New Roommate
by Sleepingkit
Summary: Craig finds out that the 1# guy he hates will be living with him, in the same room! That person of course, is Kenny. Maybe the hatred will change overtime once he finds out about Kenny. If, Craig could get over his past.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: I know most fanfiction writers name Craig's little sister, Ruby. But I've searched and her REAL name is unknown and never said on the show. So please don't get mad that I named her a different name xO! Enjoy**

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><p><strong>Chapter one: New Information<strong>

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><p>Craig Tucker, a boy of 15, sat on his bed playing with his guinea pig, Stripe. Here's a little background of the two. First, Craig has black straight hair, with a bang that covers the right eye. His a orbs is a shade of cold silver. The raven is tall and slim, but lightly muscled. Craig has a soft spot for Stripe, and it is really not wise to anger the short tempered teen. Though it was one of the reasons he got teased for by his gang.<p>

Stripe is a chubby female guinea pig. Her long hair is grayish blue, with a pure white underbelly. Both eyes are black spotted, one ear and tail are white. Stripe is Craig's living diary, secretly of course. The boy tells his guinea pig everything, which will be seen later. The rodent jogged across the covers to catch the red ball her master had tossed. Craig smiled proudly as Stripe fetched it back. It took him weeks to teach the trick, all that hard work was awarded. Just then, he heard a distinctive knock at his door.

"Come in, Mad." Craig said, knowing his sister's knock. A henna red brunette came in, her brown eyes raking over her brother's poorly kept floor. Mad wore her curly hair in 2 pig tails(A/N: her full name is Madeleine.)

"Craig, mom and dad want us." She informed. The older boy sighed, having his special time interrupted by his someone again. He put Stripe back in her cage, or as Craig likes to put it, burrow. The two siblings went down stairs to the living room. Their mother, skinny with dyed black hair pulled into two Japanese buns. Mrs. Tucker's dark green eyes watching the T.V. Her husband, Thomas, fat with graying brown hair, caught his children coming in. Craig still doesn't know where he got his raven head from, they said it was from his father's grandmother. Mrs. Tucker soon caught them as well.

***Craig's Point of View***

"Ok, you two are familiar with the McCormick family, yes?" My mom started off slowly, already knowing the answer.

"McCormick? You mean Kenny fucking McCormick? Oh yea, I know that crap filled-Ow!" Mad had kicked my ankle to shut me up. I gave the little kid a hard glare, but silently thanked her for stopping me in my profanities.

"Uhm, yes, _That_ family. W-well…well.." My father cut her off.

"Oh for peep's sake Belle! You don't gotta put it out all sweet and honey! Look, the McCormick family will be living with us for a while do to losing their only home."

"WHAT THE F-"

"_Craig." _Mad had warned me again, I growled.

"So you mean to tell me, that KENNY is going to be living under the same roof as me!" I am outraged. I HATE, HATE, HATE! That little bastard.

"Yes, Craig, Hun, sweet heart, yes." Mom said calmly. "Now I know you don't very much like their younger son, uhm.."

"Kenny? You mean Kenny Dumb-ass McCormick?" I suggested to help her memory.

"Y-Yes, Kenny. But you're gonna have to get along with him while he's here ok?"

"Mom, I can't get 'along' with him! You don't understand he-"

"Listen to your mother boy. You will respect the McCormicks and show them all your love and passion. I want you to kiss their _asses_ while their living with us. By god you will be the most proper creature on this planet, do you understand that?" My dad ordered.

"…Fine." I hissed through gritted teeth, flipping him off. He then returned it, resolving in everyone getting the bird by everyone else. My mom sighed in relief, seeing that all was well, for now.

"Well! Now that's settled, Any questions?"

"I have one. Will they be living with us permanently?" Mad asked.

"OH HELL N-"

"_Craig…" _My sister glared.

"Ok, ok…"

"Unfortunately, no. Only till things get sorted out. Here's how everything will be. Ms., And Mr. McCormick will be sleeping in the guest room. Karen will be sharing your room with you. Kevin will take your room Craig. And Kenny will stay in the attic…" My mom trailed off in her information. One thing was left out.

"Wait, if my rooms taken, then where am I sleeping?" I demanded.

"…With Kenny…in the attic.." She answered slowly.

"WHAT!" I wanted to scream, but dad gave me a look that told me not to.

"That's right. Kevin is a growing man, unlike yourself. So he needs his private space. And I won't have you sleeping on the couch like we have no space. So within a week, they'll move in and you'll be sharing a room with Kenny. You two can leave now." He dismissed us. Gathering what's left of my maturity, I walked up the stairs trying not to stomp. When I'm sure I have my total privacy, I let it out.

"Oh my fucking Jesus! Stripe do you know what just happened?" I interrogated her, she just blinked her beady eyes at me.

"My parents just informed me that the McCormicks will be staying with us. Not only my house would be intruded by those rats, I'll be in the same room with Kenny in the attic! Don't you know how much I hate that arrogant idiot? GRR!" I really, really despise him. With pure passion. This is why: He's useless. He knows his family is poor and does nothing about it, he could get a damn job but doesn't. All he does is sit in front of the T.V and drink beer and burp. Kenny hidden his face since 3rd grade as if he's better than everyone else and generously now shows it. He's a punk who disappears, at the most, for 5 months and come back acting like nothing change. His friends act the same way. Kenny contributes _nothing_ towards life and he knows it. I hate that he always smiles and laughs. Making jokes and jumping around. How can he be so care free? I hate that it seems like he never felt pain or sadness when he should. I hate that he's more happier than I am. To me, in order to fully love life, you have to hate it first. You have to go through all the hardships and depression to understand the gift of life. Kenny Lazy pants McCormick seems to not even went through any such thing. I suddenly noticed my head was dizzy and realized I had been screaming into my pillow to release my anger. I have trouble handling it. A little better, I turn on my laptop to check if anyone's on the chat site.

TheFinger: Hello?

GameMaster75: Hey Craig my man, wats up?

TheFinger: Clyde, you'd not guess what just freakballs happened!

GameMasta75:….Did u just say freakballs…?

TheFinger: THAT'S NOT THE POINT! Guess who's livin' with me next week?

GameMasta75:…Me? :D

I almost smashed my fist through the screen.

TheFinger: NO you nitwit! Kenny! Kenny the Doob McCormick! And I'm living in the same room as him

GameMasta75: Oh wow man that totally sucks. I hope Ken be ok, you might murder him dude.

TheFinger: Pfft I know.

GameMasta75: Well I got chores to do so I'll cya 2maro at school, ok?

TheFinger: Sure byes.

~GameMasta75 logged off~

~LickMeAllOver logs in~

TheFinger: The fuck? What kind of name is that? Who r u?

LickMeAllOver: I could ask you the same thing. Just know that I have a….._business,_ that I put myself out here online.

TheFinger: Wait so you're a whore?

LickMeAllOver: I prefer the term prostitute. I'm a good price, 45 bucks an hour? It's tempting.

TheFinger: No thanks…

I don't know who she is, but she seems interesting. I've never met an actual prostitute before.

LickMeAllOver: Your lost. So how are ya?

TheFinger: I cud be better. This guy I hate, Kenny, is moving in with me.

LickMeAllOver: Can't you get along with him?

TheFinger: Never, he could rot in hell for all I care.

LickMeAllOver: Wow…oops someone just pm me and offered 56 cash. Sorry, I'm on my job. Chat with ya l8ter?

TheFinger: Sure, I'll add ya.

LickMeAllOver: Cool, bye

TheFinger: WAIT YOU STILL HAVEN'T TOLD ME WHO YOU ARE!

~LickMeAllOver logged off~

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><p>REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW I COMMAND YOU TO REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! THAT'S AN ORDER MAGGOT!...sorry I feel like a drill sergeant right now.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter two: The Arrival**

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><p>Last week was hectic, preparing for the new (lame) movers was tiring. We cleaned the house over for like 10 times. I commented saying we should keep everything messy, since they're used to being dirty. That earned me a slap up side the back of my head. Mad, who's room is always spotless, just had to fix up the top bed on her bunk. <em>I<em> had to move my stuff into the attic. Which is a very high place. Good thing the extra futon is up there already, I was not going to carry a whole couch up that height. Dad had to help me hook up my electronics that needed plugs. Although I couldn't have all my stuff in the attic for two reasons. One of course, I have to share the space with Kenny. The other account is that Kevin needs some of my furniture. I also settled Stripe up in the attic with me. Mom and Dad handled the guestroom. Everything is now nice and tidy.

I've also chatted more with 'LickMeAllOver'. The only big thing I've discovered about her, is that she's a he. A big shocker. Nothing about his age, what school he goes to (if he still goes to school), where he lives, but I do text him now. He told me I could call him TongueTwister which is his prostitute name, or Puppy, which is what his clients or customers yell at him. I decided to just call him Guy.

Right now I'm in the kitchen eating flapjacks. I usually eat in my room with Stripe, but I don't really feel like climbing up to the attic with pancakes.

"Thomas, do you think the McCormicks would like my breakfast?" My Mom asked. She's been worrying about everything she's doing, wondering what they would like and dislike.

'C'mon ma, before this, all they probably ate was frozen waffles. They'll _love_ your pancakes." I told her with my straight face. Dad gave me a look.

"Of course they'll like it, Hun. No need to worry." He reassured her calmly. Her shoulders relaxed quickly. Eating another piece of flapjack, a thought had just occurred to me.

"Mads, do you think you're gonna like Karen?" I questioned. Those two will be sleeping in the same room after all. And Mad hadn't comment on the whole arrangement.

"Duh. I've been trying to tell you this, but every time I mention 'McCormick', you go into a rant about hating Kenny. Karen and I are actually great friends."

"What the-" I started.

"That's wonderful!" Mom exclaimed. "It'll be like a long slumber party for you girls! I'm so happy at least one of my children are sweet enough and gets along with other people."

"What's that suppose to mean?" I demanded. Just then the door bell ringed.

"That's them! Everyone be proper!" My mom quickly shot up and was going to sprint to the door. Then caught herself and calmly walked over. This was my cue to leave. However as I got up, dad got me.

"Sit back down boy. Put on a smile for our guest." The old man gave me an evil smile. I flipped him off, he returned it gracefully.

"Come in! Come in! This is our kitchen…" Mom brought the penniless group in. "This is Thomas my husband, he works at…" As she pointed us out and gave a little information about us, I took this chance to examine the family. Ms. McCormick greasy bright dyed red hair which usually hanged around her face, was pulled into a braided pony tail. Her young looks shown by her clear blue eyes. Her partner, Mr. McCormick wore his usual 'Scotch' hat over his shaggy light brown hair. Karen, looking like her father, had the brown long hair, but darker. Her violet eyes staring cheerfully at my sister. Kevin had his head shaven military style, one ear holding about 7 earrings. Kenny's straight rainbow tipped blonde hair was now a bit fluffed up. His deep green orbs eyeing everything in the kitchen. Pfft, arrogance.

"…And that's everything! Oh, we have plenty of pancakes left, who wants some?" Mom had finished with the introductions. Everyone said they were hungry, except surprisingly, Kenny.

"Are you sure?" Ms. McCormick asked her son. I so wanted to say it's better than those half frozen waffles, but Mad guessed what I wanted to say and bumped her elbow against my arm.

"Nah, I'm good. I'm going to Cartman's house later anyway. I could eat there." Kenny answered. As everyone was sitting down I took this time to leave again. Of course, dad stopped me.

"Oh Craig, since you got nothing better to do and Kenny's not gonna eat," I could see where this is going. "How about you give him a tour?" It wasn't actually a question. The look he gave me told me not to argue.

"Fine…" I left the kitchen without waiting for the blonde to follow. When I got into the hallway I stopped though. He emerged from the kitchen entry and came to me.

"Uh, hey." The idiot greeted. I returned it with a grunt.

"Yea, right there's the kitchen. If you looked at your left when coming out, that door is the 2nd door to the backyard." I won't bore you with the details of my house. However the tour went something like this, with me ignoring him,

_"The downstairs bathroom is here…"_

_"So what are doing today? Maybe you could come with me to Cartman's?"_

_"Right up there is where the bedrooms are…"_

_"You're 15? Cool me too. What games do you play?"_

_"If you look to you're right.."_ Yeah, I was not going to act all sweet and friendly towards this poser. We finally got to the last room, the attic. When you enter the room, you have to lift this door on the ceiling and walk up the stairs. My stuff is on the right. I quickly sat on my bed and signaled him to sit on the futon (folded in couch version).

"Ok, let me set the ground rules. THIS-" I motioned to my side, "Is off limits." Kenny nodded his fluffy head.

"Good. That's rule 1. Rule 2, you don't wake me up, EVER. Unless you know it's an absolute emergency." He nodded again.

"Rule 3, NEVER touch my Stripe." I pointed to the cage close to me. Before I could lay down the rest of the rules, Kenny broke rule 1.

"Aww! It's so adorable!" He practically _squealed. _The bastard came and looked down upon Stripe.

" 'It', is a she. And I know damn well that she's adorable. By the way you're breaking rule 1."

"Oh sorry! But can I just please, please, _please_ pick her up? She's so cute and fat!" I slapped my forehead, does he want to break all my rules? Kenny was smiling so big, squealing and making awwing noises at my pet, it was humiliating for a 15 year old.

"That's rule 3. You can't touch Stripe. Besides, someone so insignificant shouldn't even look at something so pure and angelic like Stripe." Kenny flinched at my stinging insult but I didn't care. The boy needed to be put down some. He went over to his futon where he belonged.

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><p><strong>*Kenny's point of view*<strong>

I sat in the living room of Cartman's house, watching Eric shoot up Stan's team on the game. It was an uncomfortable silence, until Kyle broke it.

"Ok, I'm gonna say the elephant in the room. How's living with Craig?" They all knew how much we get along. I fidgeted with my fingers.

"Weell, I've only been to his home for like 20 minutes then came here.."

"How'd Craig treated you?" Stan persisted.

"The same as he does at school. Ignores me, acts rude, nothing new." The raven and red head shared a look.

"Want me to beat the crap out of him?" Cartman suggested. He became much more caring over the years. Around 6th grade, we knew that all we had was each other. School and life is tough for teenagers, just letting you know. When Kyle got jumped for being teased by his Jew-fro, Eric helped him out. When Stan almost got raped in 8th grade and kept having nightmares, Kyle was there, and so on. Now they want to help me with Craig. I'm actually ok with him, but in 7th grade he started acting differently towards me.

"Ha, you don't gotta do all that. Won't he just hate me more?" I chuckled. Cartman really doesn't know how to handle things.

"Do you even know why he hates you?" Stan wondered.

"That emotionless freak won't never tell us! This is why you should of lived with one of us." Kyle insisted irritated. I shook my head, not liking when he got this way.

"You know how much I wanted that Ky. don't worry too much." Just then 'Lollipop' by aqua blasted. My friends knew exactly what it meant. They watched me miserably as I picked up my phone and read the message. After about 10 seconds, I sighed and stood.

"Well, looks like I'm needed again. Cya." Kyle looked away, Cartman studied the controller in his heads. Stan was the 1st to protest.

'C'mon Kenny! Please, there are other-" I cut him short.

"I know there are other ways. But this is…just the easiest way for me…" I soberly put on my shoes.

"What about Kevin…?" Eric queried. My eyes twinkled.

"I'm getting used to it." I paused and chuckled, thinking about it. "You guys probably think this is gross, but I'm starting to _enjoy_ it." I glanced over their faces and saw just what I was expecting. A mixture of shock and disgust.

"Oh Kenny…" Kyle said sadly, resting his head in his hands. I smiled bitterly. I don't like it when I make my only friends grief stricken because of my actions.

"I know, I know. Byes."

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><p><strong>*My point of view (For Craig)*<strong>

"I promise you, I'm gonna kill him in such a bloody manner that he's gonna wish that he'd never been born." Craig announced to his gang. Token, Tweek, and Clyde were visiting him in his attic.

"Ok, I'm pretty sure everyone is tired of your yapping of hatred," Clyde started, "So how about I tell y'all the latest rumors?"

"R-r-rumors? GAK!" Tweek sipped his coffee.

"Ugh, aren't we in high school now?" Token groaned.

"You don't understand! Look, I heard that Wendy is the peeper at the boy's locker room." That got their attention.

"Everyone thought it was Lucy though. They had all the proof…"Craig said, petting Stripe.

"Pfft, I thought it was Wendy all along." Token concluded. Clyde went on with the gossip.

"Craiggers, you might like this one. They say that Kenny's bleach blonde rainbow tipped hair is, just a wig.." The guinea pig lover kept his straight face controlled, but raised an delicate brow.

"Really now?"

"T-then w-what is-ngh- his real h-hair color?" The blonde stuttered. Craig rubbed his twitchy friend's back to calm him.

"Well, no one knows. I've heard the only people who've seen his real hair is his parents of course, and friends." Clyde answered.

"Why would Kenny go through the trouble of wearing a wig, after all those years of wearing a huge parka and finally showing himself? I don't believe it." Token pointed out. Craig silently agreed with him.

"The reason is that, something about him not wanting to reveal is whole identity or something."

"C-could you ask h-him Craig?" Tweek asked.

"I'm not gonna waste my damn breath on that pansy." The raven growled. Tweek jumped from his change of voice.

"ACK! You're gonna kill me and burn my socks in front my parents!" Craig instinctively brought the scared boy closer and whispered apologies and innocent words in his ear. Clyde and Token laughed softly at the moment.

***Craig's POV***

I stuck my middle finger at the retards. Whenever Tweek gets scared and thinks we're gonna hurt him, we all have our own way of consoling him. Apparently, my way of comforting him is, as they put it, _'way gay'_. My mom called abruptly.

"Well It's time for us to leave. Laters." Clyde shot me the peace sign, and shook Stripe's paw.

"Ya, good luck with Kenny." Token gathered his jacket. I said my good byes as I released the boy in my arms.

"G…good bye C-Craig." Tweek said softly blushing. I smiled at his shyness.

"Good bye guys."

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><p>"Oh, oh! What time is it? My son still isn't here!" Ms. McCormick worried, trembling holding her fork. "Where could he be?"<p>

We sat at the dinner table, eating rice and meatballs. The missing son, is of course, Kenny.

"Please, when he's not here-Ow! Quit doing that!" I was going to make a smart comment, but once again Mad's foot had to stop me.

"I have to do it, your mouth will get you in big trouble one day." My little sister chewed her food as if she's all knowing.

"Uhm, mom?" Kevin began, seemingly awkward to sit at the table with us. "Ken's on his job right now. That's why." A job? An actual job?

"Oh yes! That's right!" The mother turned her attention to my parents. "My two babies both got a night shift job. Sorry if they disturb you coming in late."

"Not a problem. So, what are their jobs? My son sure could use one." Dad gruffed kindly. I bore daggers into him.

"We don't know, actually." Mr. McCormick scratched the back of his head embarrassingly. He had the generosity enough to take off his hat during dinner. "Just that it's low paying." Pfft. I knew Kenny couldn't help support his family. Even with a job.

"I hope he doesn't come back too late.." Karen stated chewing her rice anxiously.

"He'll be back with in the hour." Mads comforted her.

Luckily, my sister was wrong. The next two hours past and Kenny _still_ wasn't home. I have the attic all to myself, I don't care if the bastard comes back next month!

"Good night, Stripe." I told my beloved friend before snuggling into the covers. As soon as I closed my eyes, my phone buzzed. I had gotten a text from Guy(Reminder: That's LickMeAllOver).

"_Right now I'm handling 3 different chicks all by myself ;(! Getting 75 bucks tho!"_

Being used to this, I grinned and sent back,

"_Gross dude. Guess wat? The guy I hate is not here __:) he's on this low paying job."_

Guy: "_How lucky u r. After this, I have 2 other clients. These girls are getting a little greedy so I'm gonna txt ya l8ter ok?"_

Me: _That's good I was going to bed before you interrupted me anyway. Night._

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><p><strong>AN: Ok I realized that changing my pen name out of no where was probably not the best idea. If anyone read stories by Blindmist, that is me. Examples : 4 hours, How the brotherly love act started, Under the hood.**_ Please review! I like to know what you think! Opinions matter_ here!_  
><em>


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Tiny Discoveries and Old men**

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><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I silently try to lift the door up to climb into the attic. Unfortunately, I saw Craig stir. What, wasn't waking him up rule 3? No, rule 1. The bundle under the covers raised up, rubbing his almond shaped eyes.

"Kenny what the _hell? _It's like 3 am." he groaned. "I hope you know this is rule 2." Oops.

"Sorry Craig, really it won't happen again." I quickly tore off my clothes, I was aware of my roommate's eyes watching me strip. Licking my hand sneakily, I wiped at my neck to get some of the makeup off. That, was really some night. And it was good pay. Too exhausted, I laid on the couch and started to try as much sleep I had left before school. Craig spoke up again.

"Hey, your hair." He started, I perked up. "I heard, that it's a wig…so is it true?" My eyes widen, what?

"W-where did you get that f-from?" I stuttered, I could feel him smile smugly from my reaction.

"That's none of your business where I heard it. It's true isn't it?" Oh my sweet Jesus. How could he find out, especially _where_ did he find this and how his_ source_ discovered this. I glanced at Craig, he already seems to know this answer. How can I keep this kid from spreading the truth? Wait, I got dirt on him too.

"Yea it's a wig, but I'm not gonna tell you my real hair color. If you reveal to _any_one about my secret, I'll tell yours." I threaten. Craig snorted.

"Please you have nothing on me." I grinned.

"Are you sure? Your sister and mine did talk on our phone at my old house. _My_ sister especially talks loud. You could hear every word she's saying…."

"Pfft and?" He yawned, still not seeing where I'm getting yet.

"Well, Madeleine _does_ talk about you. And my sister tends to repeat the words you say, if it's something shocking…" I trailed off. Craig just stared at me blankly. I guess I'm going to have to paint it out for him.

"I know you once had an obsession with Hello Kitty." I told him bluntly. Craig shot up in the bed.

"What! How did you find out!" The raven hissed, I smirked.

"Madeleine knows you talk to Stripe like a diary. Her and Karen were talking, and my sister basically yelled it out loud." I couldn't help it any longer. I started laughing hysterically, rolling around on the couch. Craig chucked a magazine at head, and gave me the bird.

"Sh-shut up…fine, I won't tell your secret." I nodded my head but kept giggling like a jack ass. It was just soo funny! Eventually Craig made a new rule.

"This is rule 4, if you find something humiliating about me that I used to do, don't keep giggling in my face like a schoolgirl for it!" I laughed louder, he gave me both fingers this time.

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><p>"Man, you look like shit." Cartman commented on my appearance, my eyebrow twitched. My friends and I were walking towards the school, who were nice enough to wait for me even though I'm making them late. Since Craig had more sleep, he left on time. I was out like a light until Mrs. Tucker came up, shaking me gently. She really is a great mother.<p>

"Yea, thanks. It was a tough night, had I so many to take care of. It's good pay still! I earned-"

"Kenny, I'm sorry but what you're doing to get money, is not what I would call earning." Kyle shook his red curls.

"He's right you know. But let's not talk about that right now. I bet Craig's peed off that you came in late." Stan changed the subject. I chuckled.

"Yhup. Did you know he has rules for me? Oh yea! He knows that I wear a wig." Everyone stopped, gawking at me.

"How-"

"What-"

"I'll get my gun." Now we all stood staring at Cartman.

"Seriously, fighting and killing isn't always the best and only option." I closed my eyes, pinching the bridge of my nose. I caught that habit from Stan and Kyle, we started to walk again.

"Anyways, How could Craig find out? He's gonna tell his friends!" The red head exclaimed.

"No, he's not like that. But he could tell his gang about it." Stan affirmed.

"Not even that. I blackmailed him, remember that Hello Kitty thing?" We all began to laugh uncontrollably. "Y-Yea, I put that out and now he won't say a word." I winked.

"I taught you well dude," Cartman patted my head. "I taught you well."

"Ha-ha, oh yea, are y'all still coming to my house for studying?" Kyle inquired.

"Sorry, I'm gonna be studying with Wendy." He told him. Kyle and I made whistling noises.

"Looks like Marsh hitting home run." I teased.

"Mhm, he'll be a man in no time!" Ky agreed, giggling.

"Shut up!" Stan turned red, grinning. "I'm just going over her house-"

"In her room?" Cartman asked. The raven sheepishly nodded his head. We laughed harder.

"Woot! Praise the lord, our little goth's finally gettin' some." Kyle patted his back, Stan continued to blushed. I'm glad the topic is off me, and onto to something more lighter.

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

"Eep! Ms. Laments giving u-us a test-ngh-today! H-hope I do g-good." Tweek stuttered.

"Nonsense you'll do great. Unlike me, freaking hate science." Token took his books out of his locker. Them, I, and Clyde were in the hallway. The 2nd bell ranged. Well, seems like my roommate's gonna be tardy.

"You know what I hate?" I wondered in anger.

"Kenny." All of them sighed.

"Yes, but not it. I hate that he came in late and woke me up 3 am in the morning!" I also hate that he knows my damn secret. I'm gonna have to get Mad for this when I get home…

"Seriously? What kind of job a 15 year can get that they get in that late?" Clyde thought out loud. I couldn't really care less what he did.

"I don't know, but he better not do it again. I was having such an amazing dream too. I was killing Kenny by stuffing a cupcake down his throat…such joy." I breathed in happiness. It was the best darn dream I ever had.

"Ack! C-cupcakes kill!" Tweek shivered. Clyde pulled both his ear (His way of comforting him).

"No, Craig kills. Remember that, Craig kills." The brunette told him. I punched his arm.

"Damn right I do!" Just then, I saw Kenny and his friends walk inside the building. I sent him a glare and turned away, cannot believe he knows my secret!

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><p><strong>*My POV (After school)*<strong>

Karen, Kenny, and Craig walked home. Mad was not there since she had after school tutoring.

"What else happened Kare?" Kenny questioned cheerfully at Karen.

"I got accepted into cheer-leading! The captain told me I'm very flexible." She smiled proudly. "You think Mom's gonna be happy?"

"Of course! But I don't think Dad will. With you wearing those tiny mini skirts and all. I bet boys, and some girls, would just _love_ to catch you kick up your legs." The blond poked his little sister.

"B-be quiet! You're just jealous because I have better legs than you, hmf!" Karen retaliated arrogantly. Kenny raised his hands and made a oo-ing sound.

"Whoa, whoa. Honey, you're legs so fat that I took a picture of you last Christmas and it's still printing!"

"Really now? Well yo mamma so fat that she leaves foot prints on concrete."

"You wanna talk about mamas uh? Get ready, Yo mama SOO fat, when she fell in love, she BROKE it!" Kenny poked his lips out, snapping his fingers in a girlish manner. Karen gasped, raising a hand to her mouth.

"OH NO YOU DIDN'T!"

"OH YES I DID SISTA!" Craig watched as the two siblings went on with their rants of yo mama jokes and acting overly girly. He couldn't help but crack a smile and chuckle lightly at their jokes. Even though they were insulting each other, (Not to mention their own moms), he could tell they were close. Craig started comparing the relationship to his with Mad's. Are they just as close as them? Kenny might not take care of his family, but he has a great bond with them, He thought thoughtfully.

"_Come with me honey, I'm your sweet sugar candy man. Run like the wind- fly with me to bounty land. Bite me I'm yours…"_

***Craig's POV***

A ring tone blasted. I realized it was a song by Aqua. Wait, that idiot listens to them? I noticed when Kenny checked his cell for the message, Karen quickly looked anxious like she did last night and latched onto her brother's hand. The big brother smiled calmly at her.

"I'll be ok Kare." He turned to me. "Uhm, I'll be home late. My job called me, sorry." Before I could reply about him being sorry for not being home, he turned a sharp corner and was out of sight. I stood there for a moment staring at Karen. I've never been alone with this girl. Not really knowing what to do, I kept walking ahead.

"Wow, can't have kids with you uh?" She questioned cheekily, catching up to me. Her anxiousness seemed to dissolved. I looked down at her, with her smartness and snappiness, she reminds me of me. Little McCormick. LM. That's her new name. LM. When I didn't answer, she kept talking.

"I know you hate my brother, but you don't gotta hate me." LM puffed, crossing her arms. It's true, the only McCormick I can't stand is Kenny. Speaking of which,

"What's his job anyway? You seem to know." I asked as if not interested, but am. Clyde was right, coming in 3 am in the morning, is not a normal job for a freshman. LM suddenly went silent. Time past and she still haven't replied, so I left it at that, not wanting to push her. Suddenly she says,

"I really like your sister though. You should be like her more." I smirked, seriously?

"Basically, you're asking me to be 34% more violent than what I am, act like a little girl, and wrestle my stuff animals viciously for a hobby?" LM nodded, I laughed.

"Just think it over, you'll change your mind." She said. Fiddling with her fingers she stated next, "B-but I really, _REALLY_, like Mad…." Hmm, the way LM said it, makes you think she likes my sister in a different way uh? Well, I'm not the type to help you with situations like this, so I told her bluntly,

"If you do so much, I think it's best if you tell _her_ this, instead of me." The brown haired girl gazed at me and nodded knowingly. We fell into a nice silence, until LM spoke up.

"I don't like Kenny's job. Nor do I like what it will bring."

* * *

><p>OK, Think Craig! If I multiply <em>N<em> to the numerator of _YX _and then divide that with the product of…MATH IS SHITTING USELESS! I mean, when am I ever gonna use this techniques in life? So that's it. I give up on algebra and all It's factors, fractions, numbers, time, shapes and everything else! A whistle came from Stripe.

"What's that, I should keep trying? If you say so rodent." My phone vibrated, of course from Guy.

Guy: _What's up? I'm meetin this rich old geezer at an motel._ _Get this, he's married but his wife couldn't give him all his 'needs'. So he calls me up ;) Though he wanted to have 2 lovely boys, my partner is busy._

Sweet, this is my chance to know Guy better. He's still a damn mystery to me, I'll start with his… "career".

Me: _How's it like, being a whore and all?_

Guy:_ Again, I prefer the term 'prostitute'. And it's ok I guess. You'd get beaten a couple of times by you customers, some of them like to get aggressive but you'd get used to it._

Me: _That must hurt man!_

Guy:_ Lmao duh. It's a nice price to pay though_

Me: _How much do you get paid?_

Guy: _All depends. Once, me and my partner gotten $250._

Me:_ Damn, who is your partner anyway? How do you team up?_

Guy: _My partner is this male I know. You and the person have to make out with the client(s) or you make out with your partner while you client(s) watch. It's pretty fun._

I noted that he said 'male', not boy or something. He's hiding the age identification.

Me:_ People are really sick. How can you stand that?_

Guy: _Again, you just get used to it. Then you'll enjoy it. Just learn. Plus, I have a goal and life. I need the money so I can achieve that. Then I could live in such a happy life. Oh I'm on the bus and my stop came. Wish me good luck, time to meet with wrinkly old skin! _

Me:_ Disgusting, good luck. Before you leave, cud me and you ever meet?_

Guy: _I'll think about it. Byez._

I excitedly (and shamefully) put the phone down. I could finally probably meet this dude. Being a prostitute seems to be hard, even though Guy put it in a way that seemed normal. A knock interrupted my thoughts.

"Come in." Unexpectedly, Kevin's head emerged from the door on the floor. He stepped all the way in, looking around the attic.

"Um, where is Kenny?" He questioned. Oh yea, I was too busy enjoying my life without him, I forgot to tell them where he was. Disappointing I needed to be reminded of him. I flipped my long bang out of my right eye and answered.

"He's on his job." I was gonna ask why couldn't he just call him or ask Karen, but then I recalled that Kenny's the only one who posses the cell phone, and Karen is in the shower.

"Oh yea…I remember now, he's with him." My curiosity came out again.

"What _is _Kenny's and yours job?" Kevin's green eyes wavered for a moment, but replied straight away unlike LM did.

"Our jobs are unique, hard, and sometimes even fun. If you want all the information, I could easily tell you. I have no problem with that. Though it's really Kenny's decision." The older McCormick strolled over, took my pen, pulled out a clean sheet from my note book and wrote an address.

"What's this?" I spat, how dare he just write on my stuff! Even though I wasn't really doing anything…Stripe whistled an agreement. "Shut up Stripe!" Kevin eyed me weirdly from me speaking to my pet, I flipped him off.

"Uhh…ok. Well this is where you could find Kenny. Just follow this address and you'll get all your answers." With that, he left.

* * *

><p>I can not believe I just got persuaded to leave the privacy of my attic, to go out my way of finding a boy I hate, hate, HATE! As soon as he left, my curiosity got the better of me, and I pulled on my jacket and boots and left. I'm so slow at times it hurts me. At least now, I'm at the exact address, I think. I arrived at an dingy old motel, the paint all fainted away. Why would Kenny be here? I didn't want to go inside the dirty building, I didn't trust it. So I walked around it, peering through the windows. What I saw, is something I didn't like.<p>

A chocolate brown haired male (couldn't tell age, I saw the backside), was taking off his clothing in front of the man sitting on the bed. The man was old and fully naked, just wrinkles and liver spots _every_where. Even some damn chest hair. In his left hand, he held a whip, the other, a can of cream. The brown haired male settled onto his lap and-

I almost vomited, The younger male started _sucking_ the hairy nipples. I tossed a rock at the window to warn people could see and scrammed. Just what the fuck did Kevin send me to? He gave me the wrong address and forced me to witness such inhumanity. My phone buzzed again.

Guy: _Yo, yo. I'm taking a break since the old man got scared of a noise he heard. __:)_

Me:_ Sweet. So cud me and you meet?_

Guy:_ You know, I think we just did._

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Sorry for that old man part if it disturbed you!  
><strong>


	4. Chapter 4

**Warning: There will be some romance between Kenny and Kevin displayed in this chapter.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 4: Stopping it<strong>

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

"You little bitch! Think you could just screw me over, uh?" The man spitted in my face, I didn't flinch. Both of his hands were on my neck. Though he was a senior and still aging, he had a tight grip. I was getting quite dizzy, my back was forced against the wall with his body on mines.

"When I said I didn't like it that way I meant it! Now look at what you made me do, you ignorant child!" I could feel a bone snap in my neck. The man punched my eye hard and threw me to the floor, kicking my face.

"Now she knows! My wife knows what I've been doing with _under aged _boys! I'm going to jail and it's YOUR fault! All your fault!" He stomped every part of my naked body. I wonder how much time I have left here.

"You and your arrogant face!" He got on top of me and continued choking. Since I'm pretty much used to this treatment, I didn't yell, scream, or fight back like I used to. I learned that it only makes it worse.

"ARGH!" The man, red in the face out of anger, slammed a vase against my skull. That did the trick, I was dead like a door knob.

* * *

><p>I woken up to see my favorite red head looking down at me. I had a long fleece blanket covering my body, and I was held protectively in Kyle's arms.<p>

"He woke up, Stan, Eric, he's awake!" He yelled throughout the room. When they emerged from the tiny kitchen, Stan rushed over and wrapped his arms around me as well.

"Oh Kenny, look at you…" He started to gently rub my bruises. My eyes went over to Cartman. He was watching from a distance, distressingly.

"H…How long was I out?" I asked.

"…4 days.." Eric answered. "I'm going to go find you some clothes.." He left out the apartment. Crap. I always have to go get killed and leave them worrying over me like this. Crap. Why do I always have to bring them pain, all for my selfish reasons? This is the 16th time this happened, at least it only been 4 days till they discovered where I was. But still…_crap._ I know Kevin has got to be concerned about me right now. Mom and Dad probably don't care, no they do. Just don't know what I'm doing. Karen will definitely be upset. Shit.

"You have to stop this, Kenny." Kyle told me.

"Yes, please. You can't keep doing this to yourself." Stan agreed.

"…I know."

"We just care for you, we'll help you find a different way, we promise!" The red head insisted.

"…I know." I repeated. I really didn't feel all that chatty, so they left it at that. Stan went and ran some water in the bath room. Few minutes passed and Cartman came back with some clothes.

"Get him cleaned up you guys." Eric instructed. I was going to walk over to the washroom, though apparently Kyle decided to carry me there. Stan was by the tub, hand in the water checking the temperature. Both of them helped me into the tub. I sighed as the warm water touched my bruises and cuts. I felt a black eye starting to heal as my process of coming back to life develops. The crack in my skull seemed to be cured as well. Kyle grabbed one of the sponges and wipes my face of all the dried blood. Stan worked on my brown hair.

"I'm sorry you guys…really I am." I started to tear up. I didn't cry when I gotten killed a million times, I didn't cry when I first started my prostitution, and I didn't cry when they found out about me, so why am I now?

"We know." Both of them said in unison, meaning it.

"Don't cry puppy, right?" Kyle teased me gently. Calling me by one of my prostitute names.

"Yea, TongueTwister. Everything will be ok." I kept sniffling as they bathed me. Here and there, one of them would comment on how I looked, or how it's healing. Soon, I was all cleaned.

"We'll let you change in privacy." Stan said, he was about to leave, but noticed that Kyle was stubbornly still standing and grabbed his arm, dragging the flaming head out the door. I stood up, and snatched the towel hanging and dried. As I was putting on the sweater and pants Cartman found me, I listened to what they were whispering, outside the door.

"_How can we stop him from doing this?" Kyle._

"_We can't. You know by now that Kenny's going to do what he wants and thinks best. The poor kid needs the money bad and fast, and this is the quickest way for him…" Cartman._

"_I don't like it. I don't support it. And I'm not gonna tolerate it." Stan._

"_Agreed."_

"_Well what do you want to do? Tie Kenny up and lock him in your closet?"_

More tears fell, hearing them argue over me and what to do with me is painful. Maybe they're right, I could have found a better way than this. I took the easiest way out, that fitted me. I didn't once stop to think how it would affect others. I'm selfish! Plain selfish! I got done changing and walked out, the whispers died down.

"Here you go." Kyle handed me my blonde wig, and Cartman my color eye contacts. "You know, you do look much better with your brown hair and hazel eyes Kenny."

"…" I silently put on my costume and ignored the compliment. Kyle knew I appreciated it, but hiding my identity is something I stand by. I don't feel right to know someone is seeing the whole me, all me. However then again, I'm just being narrow minded.

"You look better though, I can't even tell you died." Stan commented amazed. Everytime I die, I come back for some unknown reason. Maybe a god needed me here for him/her. Or even the devil. But every time I do come back, it takes at least about 20 minutes for my wounds to heal. None of them asked me how I got killed, it's all the same story to them. Only me coming back is what they desire to know.

* * *

><p>I stepped into Craig's, I mean my house. Well new house. I still don't feel right calling it my own yet. No one seemed to be home, but I walked into Kevin's room anyway. As soon I came in, my brother charged towards me, eloping me in his embrace, closing the door behind me. My heart quicken as love was penetrated through me. Kevin, still holding me, sits me down on the bed next to him.<p>

"What happened, now." He demanded. My eyes wandered to my hands.

"T-The man was drunk. He got angry that his wife called during our session. The wife found out about what he was doing with me, and he blamed all his mistakes onto me…he just took out all his anger one me, nothing much."

"Shit, Kenny, it's not 'nothing much'. I knew I should have came with you…I'm so sorry this keeps happening to you and not me…" He laid my head onto his chest, I felt his warmth and heart beat. I wrapped my arms around his waist, taking in his scent.

"I don't want it to be you. You wouldn't come back if it _was_ you that died. I-I got the money though." I whispered.

"Fuck the cash Ken. I'm glad you came back soon. I promise you, once we gain enough money, we'll move somewhere better. I promise you that we'll get mom and dad into rehab. I promise you that I'll spoil you and Karen for the rest of your lives. I promise we'll have a good life."

Kevin lowered his lips and brought them to mine. They were so soft and comforting, that I cried. An affection that is viewed wrong by society brings me happiness. We had started doing this just for the money from our clients. Then, it started getting _intimate. _We grew to enjoy ourselves along with the act. Eventually we grew to love each other within it. Karen knows, she doesn't care. Before my mind could flash back to the past and many mistakes, Kevin brought me back to reality. He clasped his hands against the sides of my head, deepening the kiss. His tongue rubbed against my bottom lip, I gave him entrance. My brother softly pushed me down onto the bed, I'm now caressed by his whole body.

"I love you so much Kenny. I just want the best for you, Karen, us." He breathed against my lips.

"I know Kevin, I love you too." He kissed my cheek, brushing the hair from my face. He studied my appearance.

"Why do you hide your eyes from me little brother? I'll accept you, I will." He promised me. However Kevin knew I was not going to answer, so he kept giving me his love. Kissing his delicate lips on my face. I snaked my arms around his neck, bringing him closer. I'm so content in his hold. After several love exchanges, he spoke up.

"I think we need to stop this."

"You don't know how many times I've heard this." I rolled my eyes.

"No, I meant us." Kevin lowered his head to kiss my neck, not wanting to see my devastated face.

"U-us?" Tears sprang to my eyes again, this time out of misery.

"I know Kenny, I know. It's for the best. You don't need me to get this kind of love." He kissed my lips again.

"B-but you're the o-only one w-who would a-accept me…" I bawl. He's the only one who makes me better after times like this.

"No I'm not. Please just look around you! There are other people waiting to give you affection. You just have to search.." Kevin whispered, brushing my hair again.

"Don't leave me…please.." I begged, whimpering. Kevin smiled gloomily.

"I'm not leaving you, know that. I'm always here for you, ok? Tell me you know this. Tell me."

"…..mhm.." I muttered quietly. Kevin pressed his lips against me again.

"Good. It hurts me too Ken, believe me. Your little friends are right, we have to stop this. Understood?" I nodded. "And about Craig…"

"No."

"But-"

"No."

"Ken-"

"No."

"Would-"

"N-Hm!" Before I could say no again, Kevin laid his hand firmly on my mouth.

"Confess to Craig. That's your first step. In order to stop this issue in a process, you have to open up. So as soon as you get the chance Kenny, tell Craig _everything_. If the punk doesn't accept you, then I'll kick his ass. Is that ok with you?"

I nodded reluctantly.

"Excellent, I love it when you're cooperative." Kevin laid down next to me, still holding me. "I'll miss kissing you Kenny...holding you like this...It's time someone else takes my job.."

"I'll miss it too. Kevin? Why does it have to be Craig? Why can't I confine into Madeleine or someone?" My brother smirked.

"It's because I see the way you look at that boy." I blushed. "Craig's a tough cookie, but you'll crack him. What you find so attractive about that block face anyway? He holds no emotion." I smiled with adoration.

"It's because he's like me. I go through trouble in life, but I don't show it. I laugh and grin like it's Christmas morning. Craig's face barely shows any emotion at all, like you said. So maybe, he's having some kind or been through an issue and doesn't want to show it." I explained. "I think something terrible happened around 7th grade, that's when he started hating me for an unknown reason."

"Then when you speak to him, ask about his problems. You two could probably bond over them. You need a new friend anyways. I'm getting tired of that Jew, Goth, and Fat-ass." I chuckled.

"Well that 'Goth' is getting some with the most popular freshman in our school." I stated proudly as if Stan was my own son.

"Pfft, yea right." He waved me off. I turned to him.

"Where is everyone anyway?" Kevin lost his good humor for a second.

"Out looking for you, I should really call them to tell the news. Karen, being the most obnoxious, made a whole fucking search party." My older brother shook his head. "That girl is something else. Oh, did you know she has an cute lesbian crush on Mad?"

"All along man. Don't you read her diary? And she's bi-curious."

"I could never find it! That sneaky little bitch keeps hiding it."

"Dude, Kevin, Kare puts it _right_ under her pillow every night." He stared at me shocked, I laughed. "Did she tell her yet?"

"No, Kare was about to, but then realized you wasn't home the next day and…things got a little messy." He glared at me for ruining our sister's chance.

"Excuse me for dying!" I joked. We both laughed, things were getting a little better.

Note to self, Step 1: Confess and bond with Craig Tucker.

Oh yea, THAT will be easy, a piece of cake. Speaking of which,

"You know, I haven't ate in 4 days. I'm hungry, let's eat."

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Haha, I'm starting to realize that I'm putting all sorts of couples out here, Kenny and Kevin, Karen and Craig's little sister, but still no Craig and Kenny! Don't worry, it's in the process. By the way, Have you guys found out who's Guy? The person Craig texts? I think it's obvious now XD**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter five: Step One**

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

Mad, LM, and I entered the house, late at night. Our parents were still searching for Kenny. This is exactly what I mean, he'll go missing for days or months, and come back like nothing happened. Having everyone who cares for him worry. His lost connection started a day after he left for his job. Karen went crazy with uneasiness, calling the cops demanding for a search party. Kevin tried calming her down, she wouldn't listen. Saying she's sick of this keep happening. This is the 4th day we searched everywhere, and still nothing. Kenny's friends even skipped school for a few days to look for him.

"I want my brother Mad…" LM murmured, still looking like a zombie. She lost all life from her eyes eve since Kenny went missing. How could the fool do this to his own sister? I could remember before he left for his job, how they both teased and played together.

"It's ok Kare. Please keep hoping, you said this happens a lot right? He has to come back!" My younger sister wrapped her arms around the depressed girl, she pulled away.

"I'm so tired of this! I just want Kenny…" Mads looked at me for help. I gave her a look that said, 'What could I do?'. She glared. Seriously, what am I suppose to say? I hate the missing boy, though I'm not that cold hearted to say I wish he stay unfounded.

"Uhm, Karen? We'll find him, South park isn't that big." I tried to comfort her.

"Mhm. I'm gonna tell Kevin we still failed to find him." The browned hair girl sulked out of the living room and upstairs. My little sister shook her head at me.

"Are you serious Craig? I know you hate Kenny, but so much you can't even comfort his little sister when he's missing?" I felt stabbed by the question.

"Hey, give me a break! I really don't know how to console people, unless it's Tweek. I'm not that close of a person you could expect."

"…Do you miss Kenny? Are you scared for him? Or are you just jumping with joy inside that he's not with you?"

Again, I got a stab to the heart. Do I actually act this black spirited? Then again, I can't say I miss the kid. I can't really say I'm scared for him. But I do know I'm not celebrating this situation. Before I could reply, we heard a scream from upstairs. Mads and I rushed towards the stairs, racing to where LM stood. Inside my old room, there was Kenny and Kevin, sleeping contently in each others arms. I could easily tell that they been here for awhile, since there was plates with leftover food by them. From the screech, the two brothers started waking up.

"Erm, w-what?" Kevin groaned, rubbing his eyes. Kenny, who seemed more awake, shot up quickly and looked at us sheepishly.

"Oh, Kenny..!" Karen charged towards the fake blonde and jumped on him, sobbing into his chest. Kenny embraced her tightly, whispering, what I thought, petty apologies. Mads and I stared for moment, then my sister suddenly smiled genuinely. She abruptly pulled on my arm, out of the room and closing the door.

"Why the hell you dragged me out of there!" I growled, not liking that I had got taken out of my old own room.

"They're family being reunited. Give them some privacy." Mads answered simply. I nodded my head, comprehending what she meant.

"I wonder where he was though…" I stated. She shrugged.

"At least he's back. You still haven't answered my questions earlier Craig." Mad reminded me.

"..I don't feel anything towards Kenny. However I guess I'm relieved that he's back. It'll make things happier around here."

That's again, one of the reasons why I hate him so. He's always cheerful, bringing joy and light to the room. Why can't I do such a thing? Why can't I just be as much as happy? Karen studied my face for a moment, and flipped me off.

"Well, I'm going to bed, it's like 10:34pm. I don't know about you, but I got school in the morning." With a soft hug, she walked into her room. Before closing her door she said,

"Don't forget to call Mom and Dad that he's back." Oh yea. Whipping out my cell, I dialed the number and told them the news. I could hear Mr. and Mrs. McCormick screaming with joy. A sudden fatigue feeling came over me, I'm going to follow Mad's lead and go to bed.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I sat on Kevin's bed, with Karen on my lap bawling into my shirt, clutching me.

"I-I was so sc-scared. D-don't d-die again p-p-please. At l-least n-not like t-this!" She sobbed uncontrollably. "Do y-you know how I-I f-felt? I c-could b-barely go t-to sleep! I l-love you b-brother. I b-beg you, d-don't leave m-me again.."

More tears came to my eyes. Everytime, I put my family through this. I'm used to these deaths, really. I'm used to getting killed. I'm used to all of this, but they could never get over it. My parents, yea. They'll just get some weed, get high, and forget everything within the hour. But my siblings won't.

"I'm so sorry Kare. I'm so sorry." I pressed my lips against her forehead. Kevin scooted over and wrapped his arms around the both of us, being the Big Brother. When Karen's sobs lowered to a whimper, I spoke up.

"You don't have to worry so much anymore, I'll be stopping this once and for all." My sister's head shot up to gaze at me, gawking.

"R-really?" She started to smile. My heart soared once again, I love making her happy. And I won't have to put her through this anymore.

"Yes, in order to this though, he needs to pass step one first." Kevin added. "He needs to confide in someone else besides us and his friends. That person will be Craig Tucker."

"I agree, that's a great plan. But are you so sure about Craig? I mean, the dude hates him." Karen pointed out. Kevin told her the reason he told me. A thought occurred to me.

"After I finish step one, what's step 2?" I asked. He shook his head.

"I'll tell you that after you complete step 1. In fact, you could do it right now. I'm sure Craig's isolated himself in the attic. Go now." He ordered, I stuck my tongue out at him. I've just be rejoiced with them, and now I gotta go talk to a guy who could care less about me.

"Good luck Kenny, I'm so glad you're stopping this." Karen violet eyes brighten, I hugged her tightly. Before I could leave, I heard Kevin say,

"Go get him, tiger." I smirked.

* * *

><p>When I entered the attic, I noticed that Craig seemed to be asleep. Hooray! I could now keep my secret!<p>

"You broke rule 2, _again._" An irritated hiss came from under the covers. Next, the voice soften some. "…Welcome back.." I was surprised to hear this kindness from him.

"T-thank you.." Sitting on the futon, I started twiddling with my fingers. "I-I n-n-need t-to tell you s-something…"

"Go on then, and make it fast, I need my sleep."

My heart quicken. Do I really need to tell Craig _every_thing? I really don't like it when someone knows about me. They'll turn and reject me of it, I'm sure. See, I have low self esteem. I get conscious about everything I do or say around certain people, like Craig for example. I even know how low I am. The only thing I am,(or was), good at was selling my body. I'm poor, I'll probably grow up to be like my parents. I'm ugly, I'm retarded, I'm useless, seriously. The only people I could trust is the ones closest to me. But a boy, who totally hates me, who I feel like we're the same? This won't end well.

"Hurry up!" Craig growled when I didn't reply for awhile. I gulped, starting it off with the easiest topic.

"O-Ok. Uhm, y-you remember when I told you I wear a wig? I-I also wear eye contacts to hide my eye color. I…I don't like people looking at me for who I'm really am. I know I'm hideous and a deformed creature on this earth. I say creature because I'm not even sure If I'm human. But first…"

I turned on a nearby lamp and hesitantly took off my wig. Revealing my chocolate brown hair, which almost covered my eyes. I then removed the contacts, showing my hazel orbs. I focus my attention on a far corner, I didn't want to see his reaction to my appearance.

* * *

><p>"<em>You're disgusting. Look at you!" I remember telling myself in the broken mirror one night, after I died for the umpteenth time. Dieing was still new to me, and I didn't like it one bit. I felt separated from everyone else.<em>

"_Your not even part of God's creation. God's people die and go to heaven or hell. I come straight back to life! What am I? No one will like to see this face! I need to hide this. No one wants to hear my voice either. It's whiny and annoying. I don't even like it!"_

* * *

><p>"That's why I wore my orange parka. I felt safe inside it, and that's why I thought people sorta liked me. S-since they didn't see the true me. U-until my friends convinced me to show myself, but I wore the wig and contacts.."<p>

"I know I'm ugly, you don't have to tell me other wise. I'm guessing m-my family issues is p-pretty noticeable. My p-parents smoke and drink…not getting a stable enough job, we can't p-pay the bills. That's when I started m-my prostitution…" I paused, feeling so ashamed. Craig kept silent, the only sign I could tell that he was still awake, was that he was studying me, blinking. I went on.

"It was K-Kevin, who started it first. The plan, our goal. It was to get enough m-money to get our parents into rehab, and save enough to buy a-a house. F-foolish, I know. So far we only saved enough to pay for only one of our parents to g-go into rehab. My brother didn't even want me t-to put my s-self out there, but I b-begged h-him to let me. I w-wanted…I wanted.." My voice broke, I shouldn't shed tears of this.

"..You wanted what?" Craig asked unexpectedly gently.

"..I-I wanted to f-feel like I had a r-reason I-in this l-life… I wanted t-to be useful. I'm s-so selfish that I didn't e-even think how m-my actions w-would affect those a-around me. I'm so s-stupid. I p-put them I-in so much p-pain…that's another reason why I hide my face." I pointed to myself.

* * *

><p>"<em>Kevin please, please let me help out! You shouldn't do this alone." I begged him. He still looked unsure.<em>

"_I don't Kenny…you just started high school, plus you're my brother. I could never let you do this." I got on my knees._

"_PLEASE? I want to have a reason for being here! I feel like I'm just wasting your air, let me do it, please?" After a week of begging, he gave in._

* * *

><p>"This is the face I use on my job. These are the eyes I use to look at my clients. This face is plain repulsive. A-and today…I w-went missing b-because I died. I know y-you w-won't believe me, but If y-you kill me, I'll c-come right back. Maybe not soon, b-but I will. I-"<p>

"So that's why you'd go missing for months.." Craig thought out loud.

"W-wait you believe me?" I saw him shrugged out of the corner of my eye.

"I believe in a lot of things I guess. I'm just that kind of guy. Keep going."

"Oh…so yea. This old man I was…uhm…_pleasuring_, killed me. Kyle, Stan, and Cartman found me. T-they always mostly do, sometimes Kevin or rarer, Karen will discover where I am. I d-don't know w-why I'm immortal. I'll see hell or heaven or nothing. I'm just a monstrous mystery.

"S-so yea, t-that's all I have to say for that. I don't know why you hate me Craig, I remembered when you was okay with me. B-but I s-still find you l-likable because you s-seem to be just like me. Right now, you have a blank face. You show zero emotion, hiding what y-you're feeling.

"I do that, but in a different way. I'll act happy and smile all the time, usually I'll be in a good mood. But I don't always show my sadness. I w-want people t-to not w-worry over me s-so much. S-so maybe, something bad happen to you, around 7th grade perhaps. Am I right?"

I just told him everything. He already hates me, so why is my heart beating like mad? There's really nothing I could lose, unless he'll tell people about me. I still haven't moved my eyes from the far corner, so I couldn't see his expression. The silence is killing me, I think it's getting hot in here. I'm starting to sweat from the anticipation.

"I…I hate, well I guess _hated,_ you because you lived life like a carefree dumb ass. I'd always see you smiling and chuckling. You'd bring happiness in the room, your joy radiated so bright. I hated that you seemed to be happier than me, I guess you could call me envious." Craig shrugged.

"I hated that you seemed to do nothing to help out your family, and still be that joyous. I hated that you'd go disappearing, leaving people behind wondering about you. To me and my jealousy, you were an arrogant bastard who lived life regardless.

"To me, I felt that to fully enjoy life, you had to go through pain, suffering, and hardships. All the terrible things it could throw your way. And you'd have to forget about the suffering and move on. That's pure happiness. Although…now I see what you went through…and I'm…I'm…s…s-s…s-sorry." He choked the word out like it was difficult to pronounce.

Are you kidding me? Craig Tucker is apologizing? To me? And he thought all those things about me? I'm utterly speechless. He kept talking.

"..You're not ugly Kenny-" He said my name, my real name. "-You're not stupid. You're not selfish. I actually think you're the most caring person I know. And show your face, be proud of it. Also why should you be part of the human race? It's not all that great, trust me." I think, I think he's actually trying to make me feel good about myself. He's complimenting me…he's…he's accepting my mistakes?

"You're right. Something did happened to me in 7th grade, but I don't want to speak about that right now. I know I rarely show affection in my eyes, but it's there. You just have to look…good night." Good night? I CANNOT go to sleep after that.

"W-wait! D-does this mean…we're friends?" My heart pounded as I waited for the answer.

"I guess, you could be my _associate_…being friends with a fool like you is too soon for me." He was back to his old self. I didn't care, breaking rule..1? I went over to his side squealing, and jumped on him.

"I'm SOO HAPPY! YOU LIKE ME NOW!"

"I'VE NEVER SAID ALL OF THAT! GET OFF ME,RIGHT FUCKING NOW!"

* * *

><p><strong><strong>Yay! Kenny accomplished step one! :D And poor Craig is still trying to act tough.<strong>  
><strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter six: A little friendship  
><strong>

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><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

Kenny stood in the closed bathroom, gazing at himself into mirror, at his actual self. The brunette had woken up earlier than everyone else, surprisingly. He stared back into the hazel eyes, and glanced at his dark chestnut hair. Kenny's eyes wondered towards the blonde wig and his eye contact case laying on the toilet seat, wondering if he should put them on. Last night's events replayed back in his mind. He told Craig everything about him, and the raven accepted it. The Tucker boy revealed why he hated him and apologized for accusing such things. He also remembered that Craig told him that he wasn't ugly, that he should be proud of his face. Kenny stared back at the mirror again, and couldn't help but flinch and avert his gaze. _I look so vulnerable and hideous… _He thought sheepishly. _Maybe I should just put on the wig and contacts…_ Just then, the door came open. Kenny's scream deafen as he realized it was just his sister.

"Calm down, it's me." Karen stated yawning. "You shoulda locked the door if you wanted privacy." Her deep violet eyes caught the items that rested on the toilet. Kenny grinned timidly.

"I-I'm was just wondering if I shouldn't wear them. I think I am t-though so…" Kare laid a hand on her brother's shoulder.

"Trust me Kenny, you're very adorable looking. You're a McCormick for Christ sakes! But I guess not wearing the fake hair _and_ eye contacts is too much. Here's a tip. Start with the contacts first, a lot of people would love to see those hazel eyes." Kenny fidgeted with his feet at the compliment.

"A-are you sure? You're lying. My eyes are vulgar looking. They've seen such terrible sights." Karen shook her head.

"Have you seen you're orbs? Do you even know that hazel eyes look like they change colors? Like right now, they're a golden light brown, flecked with green. It's very unique." The younger sister brushed some of her brother's hair away from his eyes.

"…Unique?" He looked a bit hopeful.

"Of course. Like my violet eyes. They're rare in people. So I show em' off! Now," Karen snatched away the contact case, causing Kenny to make a grab for them. "Ah-ah. I'm forcing you to wear your real eyes. No buts." With that she dashed out of the bathroom.

The brunette stood there blinking in shock. _Did she just took my contacts? Ok. Maybe I could just walk around today with my eyes closed…yea that'll work_. Unfortunately, and obviously, he couldn't have done that. So he got ready for school, ate breakfast, and left for school before Craig could even brush his teeth.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

"So Craig, Ken came back yesterday night?" Clyde said, through a mouth full of hamburger they had during lunch. The bastard has no kind of table manners.

"Eww, yea he did."

"D-do you k-know-ngh-where he was?" Tweek asked. I shook my head no. I don't think it would be in my right to tell them where and what exactly to Kenny. They probably wouldn't believe me anyway.

"Speak of the devil." Token commented. The boy we was talking about was walking past us, the first thing I noticed was that he had his hazel eyes. When he glanced my way and smiled friendly, I flipped him off, slightly blushing. I have hated him for so long, I really don't know how to act around him anymore. Should I completely rush in and be like I was his best friend forever, or just start it off slow and- wait, I'm talking about this like we're fucking dating or something! Before I could ponder more, I saw that my gang's faces were shocked, gawking at me. I raised a brow.

"Why the hell y'all looking like that?"

"Dude…you just _flipped Kenny off…"_ Token answered, still gawking.

"So? I flip everyone off." To set an example, I gave him the bird.

"That's just it. You only flip people off you like. That's like, how you show affection man, a weird way, but that's how you do it." Clyde went on explaining.

"A-and you hate K-Kenny. You s-said you w-would never-ugh-waste you middle f-finger o-on someone unimportant." Tweek added. My eyes widen, they were right. I slammed my hand on my face, I just displayed my likings for the fake blonde in front of them. Crap.

"You like him now, don't you?" Token guessed cleverly. "Something must have happened yesterday, because you was just about to start a 'I Hate Kenny Fan Club' a few days ago."

I kept silent, averting my gaze from them. Clyde shrugged.

"Oh well, he doesn't wanna talk. And when Craig Tucker doesn't wanna talk, he won't." The brunette patted my back. "At least you don't despise him no more! I'm so proud of you."

"H-Hey g-guys. I don't k-know If I-I'm right, but, d-did K-Kenny's eyes l-look different to y-you?" All of them turned to his table and gasped.

"You're right Tweek! You think he's wearing eye contacts?" Token questioned, I knew the answer but didn't know if I should say something. Man this is hard. If he showed his real orbs, should I affirm Token's guess? Or keep quiet?

"OH MY GOD! The rumors were right!" Clyde exclaimed with delight. "That's his real eye color! Eeek, I'm so excited. So that means that his hair is fake too!"

"Shut the hell up Clyde, don't want the whole entire school hearing." I ordered. Again, they all gawked at me. I groaned, I just showed that I cared about him.

"Wow, n-now I r-really w-w-wanna know what h-happen yesterday." Tweek stuttered.

***Kenny's POV***

I sat down next to Cartman at the table. I feel so exposed, everyone could see my eyes. 10 people already double-take when they saw me. They're surely to see how disgusting I am. Before I could even get an hello from my friends, I got interrogated.

"Dude where's your contacts!"

"Why did Craig just flip you off?"

"Guys…"

"Are you better?"

"Guys…"

"Are you going to reveal your full identity now?"

"Are you really stopping what you're doing?"

"GUYS!" I yelled. They all stopped their yammering and listened. "Good, now to answer your many many questions. Karen took my contacts, Craig flipped me off because he likes me now, yes I am better, I'm not going to reveal my identity all at once, and…I am stopping this."

"Oh Kenny, I'm so relieved." Kyle reached over the table and snaked his arms around my neck. "This is all for the best."

"Yeah, Kenny. And taking off your contacts is a good start. You look better this way." Stan said, studying my eyes. I blushed and turned my attention on my hamburger.

"Wait, you said Craig _likes_ you now? Why all of a sudden?" Cartman asked. I took a deep breath and said,

"I told him everything about me, my past, my problems, my identity, my prostitution, my deaths…everything. Kevin the Turd made me. He told me it was step one of me stopping this. Trusting and bonding with someone else. I guess me and him 'broke up'." Stan instantly held my hand, understanding what's it liked to be dumped. He had an on and off relationship with Bebe before he started hanging out with Wendy.

"Was it hard for you?"

"It still is, but I have to learn to love him more as a brother." It hurts in my heart like crap. I can never forget how much I loved Kevin and what he gave me.

"However like you said, it's for the best. Plus, I think my attractions turned over to Craig…hehe." I giggled timidly as they stared surprised at me.

"Why would you like him? Out of all the people you could fall for besides Kevin, you pick _Cold Corpse Craig_?" Stan flabbergasted, using the name we called him back in middle school, when he first started showing no emotions.

"I thought at least you'd go for Kyle!"

"H-Hey!" The smart kid's face shaded a color that almost matched his hair. He punched Stan on the arm.

"You finally accepted it uh? I knew all along." Cartman scoffed. "I tell ya, I was getting sick of you ogling him." I quickly got defensive.

"What! I was not _ogling_ him! Besides I could have done nothing but ogled him."

"Ok, ok, back up a second. You confessed everything to Craig, and what was his response? Was it pity?" Kyle inquired.

"Well, I can't say pity. I don't have a word for it. He just told me that I'm the most caring person he knows, and that I'm not ugly and stuff. Craig also told me why he hated me."

"WHY HE HATES YOU!" All 3 got in my face. The reason the raven doesn't like me was like the number one mystery in our lives.

"Damn, calm down guys. He told me that he thought I was arrogant, living life regardless, being happy all the time, he said he was jealous of me. He also told me that he thought to love life, you need to go through pain and move. That's one thing he thought I never went through. Craig thought I did nothing to be useful for my family, but now he knows." I smiled, remembering what else he confessed.

"He told me that something did happen in 7th grade. But he won't tell me yet. That's why I like him, I feel like we're the same, he makes me feel not alone. Whatever happened in 7th grade caused him to not show his emotions well."

"Oh, I could understand that." Kyle nodded.

"So…you two…are..friends?" Stan asked slowly, just like I did yesterday.

"Nah, we're _associates._" I chuckled. "Hey, it's a good start!"

"Well congratulations Ken. You're freeing yourself from these chains that kept you locked away from the bright sun shining through the clouds, the breeze that sweeps from the lake waters." Cartman said solemnly. I stared at him.

"Kyle, quit teaching him poetry, it's scaring me."

"Pfft, the fat ass is getting smarter though! Anyway we're glad that you're changing your ways Kenny." Kyle replied.

"Yea, and if Craig does anything to hurt you, we'll get Eric to beat him up." Stan promised.

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

"Yo mama so dumb, she thought a roman candle was from Italy and lit it in the house!" Karen retaliated at her brother. The four (Craig, Kenny, Mad, Karen) were walking home. Mads was there this time since her tutoring was canceled. The two McCormick siblings were arguing again with the rants of yo mama's. The insults started when Kare showed Kenny her cheer-leading uniform.

"Well Yo mama so stupid, that when you were born and saw the umbilical cord, she said 'Sweet, it comes with cable too!' " Kenny said. Mad turned to her brother.

"Do they always do this?"

"Yhup." Craig said, smiling. Their relationship _was_ pretty interesting.

"Hey Mads and Craig, wanna join us?" Kare invited, glancing at the other siblings. The raven cringed and the curly haired girl brighten.

"I'll join! Ok, Kenny, yo mama so ugly that she gave Freddy Kreuger nightmares!" Mad chirped.

"Haha, good one." Karen praised. "Are you gonna join Craig?"

"I'm way too mature to play such childish games." The silver eyed boy said arrogantly. Kenny smirked mischievously, knowing how to provoke him.

"Ok, if you're so mature as you say you are, ignore this insult. Craig, yo mama so fat, when she jumped in the air, she got stuck." The brunette teased, that popped a vein in the raven's head.

"Kenny you bastard! Yo mama so fucking dumb that she hears that it's chilly outside and grabs a bowl!" He snapped. The blonde imposer just chuckled lightly.

"That's the boy I once knew in 6th grade." Ken smiled relieved, knowing that somewhere inside, there's still the same old wise cracking Craig. The raven turned away, scorning from the comment.

"S-shut up…idiot."

"Oh yea, the 7th grade dance is coming up. Who're you're going with Karen?" Mads asked her friend. The girl brunette twiddled with her hair timidly.

"U-uhm, I-I don't know…who are y-you going with?"

"I don't know either! Eek, I'm so excited. Probably Brad, he seems good." Mad squealed. Kare looked doubtful for a split second.

"T-That's g-good. I-I hope he says y-yes.."

***Kenny's POV***

I knew straight away what was happening. Drawing my face near my little sister's ear, I whispered (or more like demanded in a hiss),

"Tell her how you feel, _now_!". I hesitantly grabbed Craig's arm and jerked him more up ahead than the girls.

"You know, I'm getting really tired of being dragged around by people. Why the hell did you pull me away?" He grunted irritated.

"My sister likes your sister. Your sister doesn't realized this. My sister wants to ask your sister on a date, but is uneasy about doing it. Since it seems like your sister wants to date this Brad guy. So, I told my sister to confess to your sister." I answered. My associate stared blankly at me. However I tried taking his advice about what he said yesterday, telling me that if I look closely enough into eyes, I could see the emotion. I did, the emotion told me, 'What the hell?'

"Oh yea, I remember that. But dude, I don't even know if Mad go that way with girls, what if she…rejects her?" Craig questioned. Something flickered in his silver orbs when he said rejected, that I couldn't read.

"I'm that sort of person who likes to take chances. If in Madeleine doesn't accept Kare that way, then at least she's sure of it. She wouldn't have to live the rest of her life thinking 'What if..' There's only one problem though."

"What?" I grinned.

"My sister is the strongest and bravest, but when it comes to someone she has a crush on, she's the most pansy and wimpiest girl I know. That's why me and you need to make a plan for Kare to confess."

"The crap? Why can't you just ask your brother for this kind of help?" He demanded me.

"Be-because I w-want to get c-closer to you." I stuttered, averting my eyes from him. "Besides, Madeleine is YOUR sister. You're involved in this as much as anyone else."

'Fine. But don't expect me to pep talk Karen about telling Mad how she feels. By the way, why you're the only one who calls my sister by her full name?" Craig questioned, noticing I kept calling her Madeleine. I shrugged lightly.

"I like her name. It's pretty." After a few seconds, the said girls walked up. Karen gave me an apologizing glance, which meant she didn't tell her. I rolled my eyes at her playfully, she stuck her tongue out.

"Ok, where were we? Oh yea, Craig, yo mama so bright that when she walked outside the sun said, 'Damn, it's morning already?' " Mad giggled at her brother's furious face. The boy flipped her off.

"Mads, yo mama so dirty that she has to creep up on bath water." We only quieted on our insults when we reached home. We didn't think our moms would like to hear our jokes.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I know my mom didn't like it when I told _her_ a yo mama joke...**REVIEW PLEASEEE!


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Long chapter title, _I know! xO_**

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><p><strong>Chapter 7: Sausage Biscuits, Steps, Plans, and Little Hints<strong>

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Saturday)<strong>

I found myself sitting at the kitchen table eating my breakfast when Kenny came in, his brown hair all over the place. He must have forgotten to put the wig on. Kenny drowsily sat down at the seat next to me, glancing at my food. When he saw my sausage biscuits he seemed to be fully awake.

"What are those?" The brunette asked me, pointing at the food. "They're like sausages between biscuits.."

"Uh, dude, duh. It's called sausage biscuits. You've never heard of them?" I questioned shocked. About everyone has ate these before.

"W-well…w-we could never afford t-them…" Kenny's eyes had a such a craving in them as he watched me eat it, I couldn't help but smile a little.

"I'm guessing you want to try it..?"

"YES! I mean, if you're ok with it." He exclaimed eagerly. I handed him the biscuit, and he held it as if it was a gift from god. Looking at it like it was so valuable. I waited patiently for about 2 minutes before I spoke up.

"In order to eat it, ya gonna have to put it in your mouth." I asserted blankly. The accelerated teen nodded vigorously and took a delicate bite out of the treat. I swear to you, as he chewed the food, his face took on a person who saw heaven.

"Oh, My, Jesus that tastes delicious!" Kenny's eyes watered like he was going to cry, I face palmed.

"Are you serious right now? It's just a piece of meat between a biscuit." He gulped down the rest of it.

"But it's so good! Could I please have some more, please?" The hazel eyes before me looked so desperate, I gave him my plate.

"Take it, I could make another batch." A thought occurred to me before I got up to go to the freezer. "Hey, you wanna know how it tastes with jelly?"

"_Jelly_? On meat?" He gasped, looking at the breakfast sandwich in his hands with a greater interest. "H-how it taste?" I smirked mischievously.

"Better than it being plain. And did you know you could eat it with _eggs _and_ cheese _between them as well?" Kenny's mouth practically dropped 3 feet. I fully laughed and grabbed the jar of jelly as I got the box of sausage biscuits.

"Here, put the jelly onto the sausage. Yea like that. Okay now try it."

"…MMM! It's so sweet! This is soo much better than waffles." He chirped. An natural instinct told me to make an offensive joke about the waffle part, but I couldn't. Watching him eat the breakfast with such joy was entertaining. Shit. I think this is what people call, 'Bonding'.

"I can't believe I'm starting to like being around you so fast.." I muttered, already regretting what I said out loud. Kenny got out of his daze and looked at me, blushing.

"Y-you like b-being around m-me?" Biting my lip, I held the urge to punch him in the face.

"I said no such thing you twit. Just eat the jelly sausage." I didn't have to order him twice, Kenny went back to his meal before I could finish the whole sentence. Though he had that arrogant knowing smile. Note to self, be careful about saying my thoughts and feelings out loud.

"So," Kenny stated, chewing, "How does it taste with eggs and cheese?"

"We have that kind in the freezer. If you're still hungry after eating that, I'll make it for you." I told him amused.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

After I had tried various types of the extraordinary sausage biscuit, and begging Craig to let me try it with ketchup and mustard, I laid on Kevin's bed, stuffed.

"Ohh, Kev. You so need to try it! It'll _melt_ your taste buds off!" I persuaded. I've never bit into something so exquisite. I should totally broadcast it on T.V. No, even better. I could hack every channel and announce the wonders of sausage biscuits…yea.

"Sure Kenny, but I don't think they taste that great. Anyways, I see that you and Craig are hitting it off pretty good." My brother grinned, laying next to me. "I'm guessing step one went well?"

"I-I think so." I stuttered at his sudden proximity, wanting to snuggle into him, getting his love like I used to. RESIST! RESIST! "But he still hasn't yet told me about what happened in 7th grade."

"Hm. Was it hard? To tell him everything?"

"Yea, I was so scared. He seems to understand though. What's step two?" My brother shot up excitedly.

"Step two: Throw Away what you Can!" He said simply.

"…What does that mean?" I asked. The shaven haired teen shook his head sadly at me.

"Oh Ken, what am I going to do with you? It means you need to erase everything that you can about your prostitution and stuff. Like, 'LickMeAllOver'. Change your username. Change your ring tone. And delete your name from our 'advertising' site." Kevin explained to me. Ah, now I see what he means.

"Step two seems pretty short to me, and easy." I commented, already going through my cell to change my username.

"No, I don't think so. Once realization comes to you, it'll hurt like a ton of bricks." The nosy bastard peered over my shoulder. "You're changing your name to 'RainbowBricks'? Dude, weak."

"Shut up! I can't think of anything else right now." I defended myself. I don't really think of a good user name on such a short notice. I then deleted my name from our 'advertising' site . I smiled lightly, remembering when we first made . On the front page, you'd see us shirtless, hanging off of each other and facing the screen. Lastly, I changed my ring tone 'Lollipop', to 'The Theft' by Atreyu. As soon as I done that, I found out what Kevin meant by realization would hit me like a ton of bricks.

I have no job.

How will I support my family? My brother surely can't prostitute himself all alone. He can't gain that much money without someone helping him. So now I'm just here being useless, again. I'm hyperventilating, oh my god. Old thoughts and questions rapidly ran through my mind. What can I do now? Why am I still living if I have no purpose? Why can't I die? Do I want to die? What would people think of me? What _am_ I exactly? _Who_ am I? How will I find something else to do in life? H-

I didn't know I was shaking and my eyes were shut before Kevin had embraced me in his arms, whispering in my ear.

"Calm down, I'm here for ya. I know it's frightening, to be back in mode again." We call my condition or whenever I hyperventilate 'mode'. Which I haven't been in since I started being a prostitute. Obviously, because I felt like I had a reason to be here.

"I-if I'm q-quitting my job…w-what e-else could I d-do?" I shivered. Kevin smiled very cheerfully.

"Step 3: Job Hunting! You, my brother, will find a new job. Like bagging groceries or something. It's not much, but it's better than nothing. Your little friends already agreed to help you get a new job." He answered.

"A new job?" I echoed, recovering from being in mode. "That'll be difficult …who would hire someone like me?"

"Quit doubting yourself so quickly, goddamn." My brother rolled his eyes. "I thought by now you'd know you're not so pathetic."

"I am." I said stubbornly. Before him and I could argue over this topic, Karen busted into the room with her head down, closing the door. We didn't know what to do, so we kept silent as she paced slowly towards us. Kare calmly took Kevin's pillow, then screamed into it.

"Well, got something on your mind kiddo?" He deadpanned. Our sister removed the pillow from her face.

"MAD!"

"We know you're mad, what's wrong?" I questioned. She glared a icy glare at me.

"No, I mean Mad! Madeleine! She keeps talking about the dance coming up and asking Brad out. Damnit I wanna ask her out but I'm too scared! And she's wondering who I'm going with. Brothers, help me! Pleaseee?" Karen got on her knees and begged. Kevin smirked and patted her head.

"Of course sis. Here's what you gotta do, first beat the crap out of this Brad guy ok? That'll show dominance. Next you get Mad and _make her yours._ She'll fall for you for sure."

We stared at our brother like he was crazy, which he is sometimes.

"Dude, she's not some kind of bear fighting over a mate." I stated.

"Uhm…yea, Kenny can you help me?" Karen turned to me.

"Yea, me and Craig are gonna find a way to help you confess." I told her.

"Craig? What he's going to do?" She cocked her head.

"Hmm, I'm thinking about maybe since he's Madeleine's older brother, he'd talk to her." Kevin snorted.

"Please, you can't even tell Craig you like him and you wanna help Kare confess to Mad?" He pointed out. "Wait, that could be step 5! Step 5: Confess to Craig! It's perfect."

"I'm getting the feeling you're enjoying this too much. And what about step 4?" I asked fearfully, not looking forward to step 5. And Kevin keeps naming the freaking steps like they're missions or something. Which, I guess they are.

"Step 4: Flirtation and Seduction."

"Oh hell no." I said quickly.

"You don't understand! Before you could confess to Craig, you have to flirt and seduce him, to ensure that when you do tell him how you feel, he'll be attracted to you already. Plus, you're like, a major in this. You've seduced many people before while you were a whore." I blushed. "And you could do steps 3 and 4 at the same time actually."

"F-fine. But if I have to flirt with Craig, than Kare has to flirt with Mad!" I insisted, not wanting to be the only one put out. Karen, who was laughing at the thought of Craig being seduced, stopped.

"That's not fair! I don't even know how to flirt, let alone seduce." She pouted. Kevin and I exchange an deviously look.

"Don't you know that we are experts in those 2 fields?" Kevin asked, acting shocked.

"Yea, we could give you some, _lessons_." I agreed. Karen's face painted with horror.

"Oh no…"

"Oh yea!"

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

"Good bye Stripe." I left the attic and down the steps, leaving to go hang out with my gang. But as I hit the landing and walked pass the guestroom I could sense a terrible yet familiar smell. I realized that Kenny's parents must be in there smoking, recalling from what he told me that night. He must been through a lot, knowing his parents are like this and still try to help them by using the money he earns into rehab. How could I have thought Kenny was being the useless and life for granting bastard, when it was his mom and dad all along?

Kenny's the one who finds a job, even the most shaming, and yet puts on a smile everyday. He dies and still finds the way to go on. I've made such an mistake by hating him. Kenny might not know it now, but in my book, he loves life, truly. A memory from 2 years ago flashes back into my head, and my heart aches. I wonder if I ever fully or could move on like Kenny did. Crap, now I think I'm starting to _admire_ him. If my friends were here, they would positively think I have a crush on the boy. Which I don't, I hope. I'm so not ready to like someone again, after what happened.

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><p>"S-Skyrim's totally a-awesome!" Tweek shouted, killing an Ice Troll in the game.<p>

"I know right, you even get to slay dragons." Clyde agreed, while stuffing a hot dog in his mouth.

"Again, you fucking have no kind of table manners." I growled,he waved me off, I gave him the bird with both fingers. Token glanced at me.

"Would you mind telling us why you're just so fond of Ken now?" The rich boy questioned politely.

"Y-Yea, c-could you?" Tweek perked up, his eyes only looking my way for a split second, then back to the game.

"Pfft, I wouldn't say I'm _fond_ of him." I scoffed. Should I tell them why? I mean, they are my friends and it's obvious they could tell I don't hate him no more. However, shouldn't I get Kenny's permission or something before telling them? Wait, I don't need his darn permission! With that new anger influencing me, I told them everything I was told by Kenny and what happened that night. Leaving nothing out.

"And don't tell a fucking soul what I said, got that?" I threaten, they all nodded, too shocked to speak. I turned my attention to Clyde. "Especially you. Rumor spreading bastard."

"I can't help it, I make and spread gossip." I flipped him off and gave a menacing look that could murder. "Fine, fine! I won't say anything. Sheesh. Oh, speaking of rumors, I've heard some new good ones-"

"Wait. So if Kenny was a prostitute, and this person who've chatted on the internet is a prostitute..could they be..?" Token inferred, cutting Clyde off.

"Are you saying that Kenny is Guy? That's impossible. I met and liked Guy before I stopped hating Kenny. Plus I haven't spoken to Guy in a long time." I protested.

"Ngh, I t-think I see w-what T-Token m-means. I-if Kenny d-did-err-get killed by an old m-man, and Guy had texted y-you saying t-that he was seeing a-an old man..it d-does connects." Tweek elaborated. I rubbed my chin in thought, trying to think of all the clues of Kenny being Guy.

_1: They both are whores._

_2: They both went to pleasure an old geezer on the same day._

_3: They both like to hide their identity._

_4: They both had a goal for being prostitutes._

Damn. Why haven't I notice this before? The only real difference I could remember is that Guy told me that he has a partner with his job. Now if Kenny, is indeed him, who would be his partner, and still keep the secret? Think, someone who's close enough that the brunette would let in. Someone who knows how to do things right and be sneaky. Someone Kenny wouldn't mind getting close to. Only one person came to mind, Kevin. Disgusting as it seems, I guess it's pretty obvious. My hints were,

_1:_ _When Ken came back from missing, we found him in Kevin's arms._

_2: Kevin and Kenny got the same jobs, duh._

_3: Kevin probably wouldn't let another person get near his brother in a situation like that, I get the 'protective vibe' from him._

_4: Kevin always seemed to be close to Kenny in a romantic way, but since after that night when Kenny confined into me, they seemed to drifted_ _a bit.  
><em>

"You know…I think you 2 are right. I think Guy is Kenny." I decided.

"What are ya gonna do now? Go straight home and yell at him for not telling you who he is?" Clyde suggested.

That was my first instinct. But, an evil plan came to me. Guy doesn't know that I know that he's Kenny. So perhaps, I could just pretend like I don't know who he is. And ask Guy questions I know Kenny wouldn't answer. The fake blonde probably feels protected under Guy, since he thinks I don't know who he actually is.

"Nah, I'm going to not tell him I know, at least not yet."

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><p><strong>I'm soo happy that I got this done, I thought I couldn't make it. Achievement!<strong> _Again, Opinions matter a lot here, SO PLEASE REVIEW!_


	8. Chapter 8

**Yay I've finally published it!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 8: Steps 3-4 and Memories<br>**

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><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Same day, later on)<strong>

After setting the future plans with Kevin and Karen, I climbed into the attic expecting Craig to still be over Clyde's house. I was scheming to pet the fat guinea pig, I can't resist! Stripe is just so fluffy and chubby looking, it's adorable. Unfortunately, my plan was ruin as I found Craig sitting on the wood floor at the end of the attic. Playing the New Super Mario game on the Wii. Excitement built up in me to see my first favorite game. The raven turned around and gave me 'the once over' with his silver orbs.

"..Hey." Craig greeted flatly. I hesitantly waved my hand and slowly made my way towards him, sitting down.

"C-can I play w-with you?" I stuttered, tapping my fingers on my legs anxiously. He raised an amused brow.

"First it's the sausage biscuits, now it's Mario." He grinned and handed me the extra remote. "You know how to do this already, right?"

I nodded happily, seeing Craig really is enjoying my company. The person I chose to play as was the yellow Toad. I don't like it that mostly all the other characters in the game have actual names, and not the other Toads. So I named the blue Toad, Toad Jester, and the yellow one, Toad Meister. We played in world 3, first stage. Oh crap, oh crap! The number '3' reminded me of step 4, Flirtation and Seduction. I gulped, this is the perfect chance to try and flirt with Craig. I glanced my hazel eyes over to him, maybe I could just do it later? I mean, there really isn't a rush. But the sooner the better. Ok, think. Craig isn't actually the person who seems flirtatious, so I could try a cheesy pick up line or something as a starter. While I was thinking, the silver eyed teen spoke up.

"What are we going to do about LM and her little crush?"

"LM? Who's that-Ha!" I laughed as I popped Craig out of the bubble and he felled right in the hole, dieing again. He glared at me.

"I call Karen LM, that's my nickname for her. You wanted me to help you with her confession for Mads, right. So what do you desire me to do exactly?" That question made me think of the perfect cheesy pick up line, without thinking about it, I said it.

"I desire for you to give me your heart, to fill the empty space in my chest."

Two signs happened after I stupidly said that. Bad sign, Craig double take at me like I was insane. Good sign, he was blushing. Over my time of being a prostitute, I learned how to define the different signs as you flirt. For example, Craig here had to look at me twice as if I was crazy, normally meaning rejection. _However,_ he _blushed_ as he stared at me. Those 2 reactions could mean 2 things. He was either taken aback and shocked that I said such a thing. Or he could have felt appreciated by my comment and just didn't know how to handle how he was feeling. The only thing I was sure of, was that my heart was beating rapidly. Seriously, out of all the things, I said '.._give me your heart.."_ IDIOT! Calm down, calm down, deep breaths. Ok, now play it off lightly.

"Haha, I'm just kidding dude! But yea, I think you could talk to Madeleine for me, you know give her an idea about Karen."

"…F-Fine, but don't expect me t-to ask her who she likes and j-junk." Craig stated. Another good sign, he stuttered. That means he's affected by my pick up line, so maybe his heart is pumping quickly as well. I slowly relaxed, this seems easier than I thought. I nudged closer to Craig, my thighs innocently touching his. Hearing his breathing hitch, I couldn't help but smirk smugly. That's my 3rd good sign next to one bad sign. If the said person's breath hitches because you touched them, it definitely means that they're nervous.

"Can we play the world with Bowser in it? I wanna jump around the lava." I asked normally as if I wasn't invading his personally space. I also noticed that he didn't push me away, which he could have easily done. That's the 4th good sign, not reacting badly to my nearness.

"S-sure." For about the next 10 minutes I sat there with my thighs rubbing against his. Craig eventually relaxed and became used to me touching him, his blush leaving his face, but still faintly there. I thought this was enough flirting for one day, so I crawled back to my old spot, giving him a break from me.

"Oh y-yea. Kenny, earlier today…I smelled your parents smoking, and I'm sorry." My head snapped to his face with shock. I know my mom and dad are retarded, but shouldn't they know well enough not to get high in another family's house?

"Oh my god." I laid back onto the floor, my arm covering my eyes. "No, _I'm_ sorry. I can't believe they'd be so ignorant and smoke that junk in your house. Please forgive them."

"The hell? Why are you sorry? It's your parent's fault for smoking." Craig abruptly paused, I could feel his silver eyes studying me. "You don't seem very upset about them doing this. Aren't kids who parents smoke supposed to be, like greatly affected by it or something, or hate their parents?"

"…I don't know about other kids, but I'm used to them smoking and drinking. I could understand why they do it though, it's a form of comfort for them. Mom and Dad always drank and smoke, but they did it more when I started going missing for months and days. They needed something to release them from the pain I brought them, and they chose drugs and beer. It's my fault really." I peered from under my arm to see Craig give me a bizarre look.

"Not everything's your fault Kenny. Your parents could have found some other type of comfort, I'm sure. I can't believe you're not even one bit angry at them for doing this. What they've done caused you to lose your home Kenny. Don't you realize that? Them smoking and drinking caused you to live such a poor life and suffering and you're not blaming them?" I smiled genuinely.

"Yea, they lost the only home I had. But at least it resulted in me living with _you_ for the time being." Craig blushed again, averting his gaze away from me. I've decided I could flirt a little more, it's getting pretty fun.

"That's one of the good things coming out of all of this. I love spending my time with you, _Craig._" I emphasized his name with deep affection that he couldn't have just brushed off. I'm starting to see that the raven isn't very much used to be flirted with, that's why he's reacting so shyly.

"W-whatever m-man. You're s-still annoying a-as always." He huffed weakly.

"_Rip them out, take them. Burn the coals as they crush and leave nothing, that resembles the soul of a man…." _My new ring tone blasted. I took out my cell and answered.

"Ciao?"

"_Konichiwa. Wait, why are we speaking in different languages? Anyway, can you meet me up at Larry's Burgers in so..17 minutes? It's time for you to find a new job my friend!" _Kyle informed me with chirpiness. Ah yes, step 3.

"Ok, I'll be there in 10." I told him.

"_Wait! If you're going to find a new, and better job I must say, what are you going to wear?"_

"What you mean wear?" Can't I just put on anything?

"_I mean you're going on interviews! No one will hire you if you come in their store or something looking like you've just been off the streets. Let me guess, right now you're wearing your famous torn jeans and a light blue shirt?"_

"…Maybe…" This kid is way too smart for his own good, that's indeed, what I'm wearing.

"_KENNY! Oi," _I could tell he was pinching the bridge of his nose in impatience, _"What am I going to do with you? Look, wear that black thin fitted sweater you've just bought. And change those raggedy jeans into gray slacks Stan gave you, which you've haven't yet worn!"_

"Cut me a break! When is a guy like me, need to wear something so professional like slacks? And aren't I getting like a fast food job or something, why I need to look important?" I demanded. Kyle thinks you need to appear intelligent in every occasion, even in a bathing suit you need a tie.

"_You could wear the slacks now! Just put on the clothes I told you and come on. Oh yea, bring your messenger might need to take applications stuff." _Click. Hm, that went well. Sighing, I stood up and went to get the items my red head ordered me to wear. I've completely forgot Craig was still there, when he spoken up.

"What are you doing?"

"Uhm, r-remember when I told you about me being a prostitute?"

"Yea, you're a slut." I glared lightly.

"I like saying prostitute. So, a few days ago, I've decided to finally quit being one and find a new job, which I'm gonna do now." I rummaged through my draws and pulled out the wanted black sweater. As I torn off my shirt, I took advantage of this and flirted with the raven again.

"Do you like what you see? You do don't you?" My response was a smack to the face with a pillow. You can't win them all, I guess.

* * *

><p>I came to Larry's Burgers and saw Kyle standing alone outside it, leaning against the wall.<p>

"Hey! Where's Stan and Cartman?" I asked, coming up to him. Kyle glanced at me hurt, as we started walking.

"What, you can't stand to be with me unless fat-ass and Stan are here? I thought we could have some alone time. Nah I'm just joking, Stan had a date with Wendy he, 'Just couldn't get out of'. And Cartman wanted to secretly spy on them." I laughed.

"So, where are we checking first?"

"We'll check the library first to see if they got any openings like, organizing books or something." Kyle looked me up and down, then cringed. "Kenny, you don't wear sneakers with slacks! Should of known to tell you what shoes to wear too."

"It could be a new style, think about it dude. It'll be fine don't worry so much." I poked him in the arm.

"I'm sorry," He sighed, "I'm just so happy you're finally getting a new job. I want it to be a perfect experience for you." I raised my brow.

"And dolling me up is the way to do it?"

"No I'm just giving you helpful tips into what to wear. But if you want me to 'doll' you up..." The red head licked his thumb and wiped it on my cheek, next he licks his palm and patted my blonde hair.

"EWWW!" I recoiled as if I was being burned. Kyle grinned mischievously.

"There, now you're dolled up." I growled while he eyed me. The red head abruptly shoved me into a near by alley, and snatched my wig off. Before I could screech with horror, he covered my mouth with his hand.

"Shh, if you scream in a alley with me like this, people would think that I'm raping you. Since Kevin keeps giving you these little steps, I've decided to make my own. Step 3 and a half: Show yourself. Look, I'm going to remove my hand...don't yell.."

He slowly lifted his hand off my mouth and I had to gain all my will power not to scream and tackle Kyle to the ground. My real hair is showing and I'm in public! I have no hat or hoodie to hide it. Eeek, Karen still has my contacts so my eyes are displayed for the world as well! Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god! What am I going to do? I'm so going to die out there, I'll come back, but I'm gonna die! Oh my god, oh my god, oh my-

I guess I was back in mode again because Kyle was shaking me by my shoulders.

"Take deep breaths Kenny, you're hyperventilating. In order to move on like you and us want, you're going to have to get used to not wearing this thing." He held up my wig. "Understood? Ok, now I'm going to pull you out of the alley since I know you're not going to move on your own.."

The flaming head tugged on my arms for a few tries, I didn't budge. To me, staying in this dirty alley all day was a good plan. I'm so not ready (or was prepared!) to have my head showing. My friend suddenly got behind me and pushed me roughly out into the open. I screamed, keeping my head down, and ran back to Kyle's side. Perhaps I could hide behind him.

"I don't get it," He started, gripping his hand on my arm to keep me walking. "You could show your hair and eyes to a person like Craig, but can't show them in public. I still don't see what's so special about him." I kept silent, too scared to speak. A few minutes later we arrived at the library and entered.

"Hi, my friend here would like to work here if there is anything available." Kyle greeted at the front desk, he jerked my arm lightly for me to raise my head. I reluctantly did, but sluggishly. I was met with an nice young looking woman with a black Afro. She smiled at me, and I ducked my head again. I'm acting like a nervous 5 year old!

"Uhm, yes, we do have an opening. What's your name son?"

"K-K-K...Ke...Ken..."

"Kendall?" She suggested.

"N-No...K..K-"

"His name is Kenneth ma'am. But he likes to be called Kenny." Kyle butted in, impatient. Peeking from under my hair, I could see the woman looking uncertain.

"Ah, well I'm sorry. I don't think your friend is what we're looking for. We need a teenager who's willing to read to the toddlers. But, it seems Kenneth is just too shy and stutters too much. I'm really sorry."

"It's ok, we'll try somewhere else." Kyle sighed and dragged me outside, I felt pathetic as hell.

"S-Sorry.." I whispered. I felt both of his hands forcing my head up.

"Don't be, that was our first try. Just gather all your bravery and keep your head up." As soon as his hands left my head, I dropped it again.

"I-I can't...I'm hideous. It's t-too hard...people w-will l-look at m-me w-weird."

"How many times will I have to tell you? You're not ugly, people won't look at you wierd. And if you find this hard, then think of something that will motivate you to show yourself."

I took his advice and thought about my family. I need to get a new job and help support them. I thought about Kare, I need to make her happy by telling her I could work again. I thought about Kevin, I need to make my brother proud by showing him the real me. I thought about my friends, I need to let them stop worrying over me. I thought about Craig, I need to prove myself to him that he could tell me things, that I could be his friend. Maybe even hopefully, something more than friends. I thought about myself, I need to get better in this life and move on. Just like Craig had said, I need to get over the terrible things and simply love life. Ok, I could do this. I raised my face to the world, for all the birds to fly by, for all the people to see. But the first thing I saw was McDonalds. The hell. Kyle saw my gawking face and chuckled.

"Yhup, McDonalds. Now I see you've gain the strength to keep your head up, I'm glad." He smiled happily. "So, this time you do all the talking, no stuttering."

"WHAT!" Too late, he shoved me (again) into the restaurant and to a worker who was on break. He whispered in my ear,

"Ask him can you speak to the manager." The guy heard the loud whisper.

"I_ am_ the manager, Mr. Grey, is there something I could help you gentleman with?"

"U-Uhm...c-could I work here..p-please?" I stammered weakly. My heart was beating like crazy, and sadly my voice came out in squeaks. My so called friend snickered at my high pitched talking.

"Ah, no can do kid. We don't need any more staff, but I'll be sure to contact you if we fire someone." Mr. Grey promised.

"T-thank y-you, s-sir.." I ran out the door and started panting as if I just got out of an horror house. Kyle appeared at my side, still snickering like a jack ass.

"Pfft! You sounded like a mouse! Wait till I tell fat-ass and Stan about this. But good try though, you're getting better at this." I punched his arm and we kept walking. This time, Kyle didn't need to pull on me. My eyes dashed from side to side anxiously. I wanted to see people's reactions at witnessing my true disgusting form. Surprisngly, several of them greeted me with a smile or waved. Some didn't even seemed to care. My friend took notice of this.

"Gosh, you're more paranoid than Tweek. I'm guessing you've discovered that no one is screaming at the sight of your face or yelling 'monster' and getting their pitchforks and torches?" He joked.

"I don't u-understand. I should be rejected!" I exclaimed, fiddling with my fingers.

"No you're not. Sometimes I think you're the only one who thinks your ugly. Even Craig said you're not hideous, that says something." Kyle grunted disbelieving.

"Oh y-yea. I f-flirted with h-him earlier." The red head snapped his head in my direction, I nodded. "Mhm. Kevin g-gave me that step, to flirt and seduce him."

"I bet Craig beat the crap out of you dude."

"Nah. He actually blushed and stuttered. He's so cute! I'm sorry, but Craig is just so adorable. You should have heard his breath hitch when I touched his thigh, so innocent. Craig seems to be emotionless, but you could see how he's feeling in his eyes. He said that. Speaking of which I like his eyes, better than mine. They're such a beautiful shade of cold silver. And his-oops, I've just sorta rambled about my crushing on him uh?" I giggled embarrassed. This is the first time I've babbled on like a girl about Craig. Kyle grinned at me amused.

"You do know, you haven't stuttered in all that chatter?" I perked up, realizing this. "I see Craig has that affect on you, your whole face brighten when you started talking about him. I'm so happy he could make you feel this way."

"Mhm, trust m-me, I could talk about him for d-days." I blushed, saying the truth.

"Wow, even when he hated you for so long. Does..does this mean you're over Kevin?" Kyle asked hesitantly.

My breathing stopped. My brother's name caused an distant memory to flash through my mind. I was back in my old house, arms wrapped around me, pulling me closer to a warm body. Kisses were stole, adoring words were whispered, and promises were committed. Hearts beating quickly next to one another, soft skin brushed against each other, and hands were searching the other's body. Moonlight shined through the cracked window, the bed springs creaked, and a new world was created. It was my memory of the first time Kevin and I had sex, but _actually_ had it. Not doing it for money, but doing it because we wanted to. The rate of my beating heart decreased, as I recalled loving him with such intensity. I recalled the joy I got out of his warmth. I recalled the sneaking we did around our parents. I recalled how right it felt when Kevin's lips touched mine. I recalled my sister's calm reaction when she accidentally came into our room and found us in the mist of making out. I recalled my friends depressed reaction when I told them about him and I. I recalled when Kevin told me we had to end our relationship with each other. I recalled him saying someone needs to take his place in caring for me. That someone must be Craig.

Am I over Kevin, truly? I know I'm starting to love Craig now, but does that mean I don't feel the same for my brother anymore? The raven has yet to show me any affection like Kevin had, but I know if I could make him open up, he will. I don't even know what 'getting over' someone means. Does it mean that I no longer feel any adoration for them? Does it mean I forget about the sweet times I've had with them? Does it mean I go on to love someone else, and act like nothing happen with them? But this is different, Kevin's my brother. Do I just act like he's my family and simply forget about the times my heart raced to see him smile at me? I don't want to forget about the memories I've had with him. I don't want to stop loving him like this, but I have to. I don't won't to forget. I bit back tears, _I can't love him anymore._

"Kenny, you ok?" Kyle had started rubbing my back. "I'm so sorry dude, I shouldn't have asked such a question so soon. Are you ok?"

"K-Kyle," I choked, "What does it m-mean, to g-get over someone? I d-don't want t-to f-forget about K-Kevin, I don't w-want to s-stop feeling this w-way for h-him." He stayed silent for a moment.

"In your unique situation, I guess getting over someone is to just love someone else, which you are. You don't have to stop loving Kevin, Ken. You don't have to forget about the times you have with each other. All you have to do is just learn to love someone else, and know that you could never have a relationship with Kevin again. Which, will be kinda hard, since you want to keep loving him. However, some people can cope with loving someone they can't have, and still go on to another person." My favorite red head brought me close to him as we walked.

"D-do you think I could cope like t-that?" I sniffled. I didn't say it, but I understood what Kyle said when he stated that people can cope with loving someone they can't have. I know Kyle likes Stan, but he doesn't go that way with boys. Plus he's with Wendy. The red head hides his crush on him very well, but I can see through the teases he pulls when he sees Stan and Wendy hanging out in school. I can see under that chipper smile he gives, even if he doesn't admit it.

"Of course you can, you're strong enough. Now clean your face up, there's a bakery across the street. You're in Home Ed right? I bet you'd do good in being an apprentice there or something." He lighten the mood. I wiped my wet face with my sleeve.

"...Why can't you just tell him how you feel? Even if there's no hope or it's useless, you should still tell him." I mumbled. Kyle glanced at me sadly.

"I know you like taking chances Kenny, though I'm not so ambitious like you are. I'm scared he'll reject me as a friend if I tell him. If I just keep it under a lock, our friendship wouldn't change." I took this in thought. His situation is such a cliche. A friend likes his super best friend, but can't tell him because it might change everything. I've heard this way too many times, and watched it in movies.

"I see what you mean Kyle, I still think it's best if you just tell him though. C'mon, I t-think this time I won't stutter and squeak like a mouse, as you put it." I bet with him. Thinking about all my problems and everyone else's, I was encouraged to push through and be brave. I even forgotten about my brown hair showing. My buddy gazed at me and smiled lightly.

"Sure, you might not squeak, but I bet you'll talk fast as hell."

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

As soon as I saw Kenny leave out the attic, I turned to Stripe.

"You just saw that, didn't you?" I questioned her, as always she just twitched her whiskers. "That idiot clearly flirted with me! He was like '_I love spending my time with you,_ Craig.' Ugh! And my heart started beating quickly, so stupid! Why would he flirt with me? I've treated him badly for so damn long, the last thing he should do is try to seduce me. H-he even touched my thigh! I can still feel his leg rubbing against mine.." A blush appeared on my cheeks and mentally slapped myself.

"Grr, don't fall for him! Don't fall for him! Don't fall for him! He's goofy, ugly, boring, weak, useless, funny, adorable, sweet, hot shirtless- DAMN IT!" A whistle came from Stripe.

"I can't 'sit down and think this over calmly'! This is serious, I think I'm falling for Kenny Fucking McCormick! Don't you remember the last time I loved someone? It didn't end well." A quick image of a girl with long indigo hair came into my mind, my chest ached. "I can't love him or anyone else! I'll just put him in pain...damn it I can't stop feeling his leg against mine! And the way he said my name..uhh this is bad." My guinea pig whistled again.

"Yea, I could go get some water. Thanks rodent." I left the attic, to down stairs, and into the living room. My parents were sitting on the couch as usual, watching T.V.

"Oh Craig, dear! I'm so relieved that you and Kenny seemed to be good friends now." My mom stated joyously.

"Yes, I'm proud of you son. What caused the sudden change of heart?" Dad asked. Nosy fucking parents.

"Pfft, I'm not a 'good friend' with Kenny. More like associates." I huffed stubbornly. Why does everyone keep thinking I'm friends with that retard?

"Ah ha! Look at that, you said his name. You always call him an insult, but you never say his actual name." Mom pointed out. "Now both my children are loving and open to new things."

"What the hell does that suppose to mean?"

"Don't use that language at your mother like that boy. Belle, I don't think _your_ son has discipline. That McCormick boy has more respect than this poor excuse for a son!" Dad declared, I growled.

"If you're going to compare me with Kenny, then I'll compare you with Stuart!" After several insults and a few rounds of flipping each other off, I headed into the kitchen to get the cup of water. I've discovered Ms. and Mr. McCormick sitting at our table.

"Oh, hey there Craig."Carol greeted.

"Yo." Stuart said simply. I scowled at them with disgust. Kenny might be ok with these punks smoking and drinking, making his life worse, but I'm not. How could they get high in my house, and say hello to me like they did nothing wrong? I gave them the bird.

"I know what you two have done, I'm not exactly happy about it." I said, getting my water and leaving them with their mouths gaping.

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><p><strong>AN: Carol-Kenny's mom. Stuart-Kenny's dad.**_ I'D LIKE TO KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THINK! *nudge nudge, wink wink* HINT HINT!_**  
><strong>


	9. Chapter 9

**Yay, the chapter title rhymes! I am so clever!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 9: Lessons and Silent Confessions<br>**

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Sunday)<strong>

RainbowBricks: _Hey, long time no see!_

Guy, or shall I say, Kenny, messaged me on the chat site. The brunette and I had gotten done with our homework(He helped me understand the shitting useless math) and went on to other businesses. Funny, Guy messages me when Kenny isn't here, hm.

TheFinger: _Dude, what's up with 'RainbowBricks'?_

RainbowBricks: _Ah, I hav wonderful news. I quit being a prostitute, I got a new job now. I cleansed myself, so I changed most of traits that involved my mistakes. Like my username. Maybe I should even delete this account and make a new one…_

Uh, Kenny told me just yesterday that he stopped being a whore as well. I took this as another reason why Guy could be Kenny. And that idiot told me he was getting a job yesterday too, shit I need to ask him what it is.

TheFinger: _Why'd you quit? Didn't you hav some type of goal being one?_

RainbowBricks: _Yea…I did. I quit becuz it was putting my friends and family into a lot of pain. I was just being selfish and unreasonable, plus it's for the best._

Great now I have to ask why Kenny quit his, and compare the answers.

TheFinger: _You've made the right choice Guy. What's ur new job?_

RainbowBricks: _Err, that's confidential. You know, you always ask me questions, I feel interrogate by a detective or something! So would you mind if I start asking you about stuff?_

Wow, didn't see that coming. The tables have been turned!

TheFinger: _Hm, sure why not._

RainbowBricks: _YAY! Ok, what's your name?_

Crap. Should I tell him? The bastard never revealed his name to me, but wait. If this is Kenny, and he knows it's me, why ask my name? Maybe he's just trying to make sure he's talking to the right guy, or he doesn't know it's me. Nah, I'll give him my name, I'm not the only Craig in this country.

TheFinger:_ It's Craig, not that you never tell me who you are._

RainbowBricks:_ Haha, yup. So it's Craig? I like that name. How old are you?_

TheFinger: _It's 'confidential'._

RainbowBricks: _Touche! Fine, you have any siblings?_

TheFinger: _Yea, one annoying tomboyish little sister. -_-_

RainbowBricks:_ Lol, I hav a little sister 2, but she's not tomboyish, she's girly. I also got an older brother. I've kissed a lot (and kinds) of people in my life, who was your first kiss? If, you've ever even had one…hehe._

Why does Kenny (or Guy) keep putting memories back in my head? The image of the indigo haired girl came back to me at the question.

TheFinger:_ If you must know, yes I've kissed someone before, and only one. She was a beautiful girl, I won't say her name._

RainbowBricks: _A girl? Ah. Can you tell me about her and why she was the only 1 you've kissed?_

TheFinger:…_She was my first love and only. I met her in 7__th__ grade, we dated, something horrible happened, that's all I'll say._

RainbowBricks: _Oh, whatever happened I'm sorry for it. But did you say 7__th__ grade?_

TheFinger: _Uh yea. Why ask?_

RainbowBricks:_ Oh, no reason. No reason at all. I'm guessing you loved her very much?_

TheFinger: _With all my heart, she's my dearest, next to my pet anyway. Look, I really don't feel like talking about this right now. So what about you and your love life?_

RainbowBricks: _It's interesting and depressing. However if you want details, I guess I could give you that. Even while making out with hundreds of people while being a prostitute, I've only really loved 2 people. The 2__nd__ person is a new crush of mines…hehe._

TheFinger: _Can you tell me about them?_

RainbowBricks:_ Alright, I'm not giving much information though._

TheFinger: _I don't think you've been aware of this, but you NEVER give much info, it's nothing new._

RainbowBricks:_ Haha, I guess you're right. Okay, I'll start with my first love. How to put it…it wasn't a…'right' kind of love as people might put it. I had affections for…a family member, a boy. I'll just go ahead and say he was my partner in being a prostitute as well. That's how our love started, just a act and for money. It got deep, and you could infer what it led to. I have no regret for loving my family member like this. Our relationship ended when I quit my old job. That's all I'll say for my first love. You probably think I'm disgusting don't you? I know I am._

TheFinger: _No, I don't think that. I actually think you're special. It's hard to learn to love someone who you wouldn't normally would. Who is your second love?_

Ok, now I'm positive that Kevin dated Kenny and he is Guy. It makes perfect sense. I also noted that he asked me if he was disgusting, a sign of low self esteem like the fake blonde has.

RainbowBricks: _My second is not really a love yet, but it's growing. The person…is someone who's not even my friend, not yet anyway. My crush began when he started hating me, which is weird. I started liking him __because__ he hated me. Although now he's ok with me. I went through and still is going through problems, and this person makes me feel not alone. I studied-_

My heart stopped, what the hell! Guy is surely talking about me. I didn't pause to think, I kept reading.

RainbowBricks: _I studied his actions, so I'm thinking something bad happen to him a few years back, which caused him to hate me. The person holds no emotion in his face, but you could see what he's feeling in his eyes, which are so gorgeous. The boy told me why he hated me and I could understand a little bit why he would feel that way. However I want to know what bad thing happened to him. I want to help him feel not alone like he did with me, I want to put that emotion back into his face, I want to make him happy, I want to love and feel love from him, I guess I want a lot of things for and from him. The person is funny, cute, smart, and under that cold exterior I could sense a sweet boy. I don't think he knows how I feel for him, but I did recently flirt with him…hehe. Oops I've done it again! I rambled on about him like yesterday! I told you I wouldn't give out a lot of information! I didn't even give my friends all this info! My bad haha, I'm like a schoolgirl. Oh, I gotta go, these jerks are bugging me to get off the PC, byes!_

_~RainbowBricks logs off~_

I felt my face heat up from the words of affection, my heart was pounding hard in my chest. I had no will power as I kept rereading the words Kenny not so secretly anymore feels for me. I can not believe, he has _crush_ on me. I felt touched and warm inside that Kenny wants to know the terrible incident that happen in 7th grade to make me feel not alone, he wants me to love him, he wants to love me_,_ he wants to make me happy and give me back the ability to display my feelings. I silently sobbed into my hands, being over come from these emotions I haven't felt in a long time. I don't want to feel this way for Kenny, I'm not ready. And now that I see what kind of person he is, I don't even want to love him. I'll just put him in suffering if I do, I'll just cause him to hate me. I'm too scared to like people anymore. Why Kenny gotta love me anyway? I'm not the only person he could have found comfort in. Shit. I don't even know _why_ I'm _starting_ to like him.

Kenny's correct though, him and I are very much alike, going through problems. He does make me feel not alone like I do for him. He's caring and strong to go through so many hardships and still have a shine in his eyes. I've only been through one and I lost all life from my face. Kenny is finally a guy who I would comment saying he truly loves life. He shows his hazel eyes and brown hair with pride and confidence, moving on. I'm still stuck here down at the bottom of the food chain, I look up to him. I don't love him, let me make that clear.

"Stripe…what…s-should I do?" The guinea pig whistled an response. "No, I can't just tell him how I feel." She whistled again.

"No, I can't sit it out." Stripe squeaked something useful. "Yea, maybe I can try ignoring my feelings, like always. Come here." I took the chubby rodent out and cuddled her. I don't want to put anyone else in pain, just because I have feelings for them. Not like last time.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

"C'mon Ken, get off that darn computer!" Kevin and Karen groaned for the millionth time. I sighed and said my goodbyes to Craig.

"Big fat meanies, I was having such a nice conversation with him." I informed them everything that happen in our chat.

"How are you even sure that's Craig? There are many people in this world with that name Kenny." My little sister pointed out. I fidgeted with my fingers embarrassed.

"W-well…when I f-found out that C-Craig was on this chatting s-site…I t-threaten Tweek t-to give m-me his user name.." I smiled timidly as I saw their surprised expressions.

"You're becoming more like Cartman everyday, you know that?" Kevin stated shaking his head at me sadly.

"I've notice that too." Karen agreed. "But if you know who he is, don't you think Craig know who you are?" I cocked my head at the question.

"I sorta actually _want_ him to know it's me. I gave out a few obvious hints he couldn't miss. But enough about me, now to _you._" She rolled her eyes.

"Do I really have to get my lessons now? I have cheer leading practice in an hour." She pouted. Kev wrapped his arms around her shoulders."Oh sister. You put me in despair! All we want to do is help you confess to little Mads."

"Ya, so just watch Kevin and I flirt so you could do this on Madeleine." I ordered. "Pay great attention."

"Fine." My brother and I already decided the whole lesson yesterday. First, he was going to flirt with me, then I with him. Kevin stood next to me, said 'hey', and slyly wrapped his arm around my waist, hand just brushing my hip. I blushed at the old contact. Karen's eyes widen at the simple flirt.

"T-This is what we l-like to call a t-touch flirt." I stuttered, explaining. "Y-you could sneak little t-touches on Mad, t-though nothing t-too much. We still d-don't know if s-she goes that w-way. Try this on Kevin." Kare looked timid, then walked up to shaven head teen and rested her head on his arm(not shoulder, since she's too short).

"L-like this?"

"Perfect! But don't rest your head too lightly, a little more pressure. If Mad doesn't show any discomfort to you touching her like this, then you could dare to wrap your hand around hers. Ok now Kenny will demonstrate a different kind of flirt." He nodded at me and I took my cue.

"Hey K-Kevin? Do you l-like hanging out with m-me?" I twirled my brown hair shyly at him.

"Of course Kenny! Why ask?"

"W-well…I just _love_-" Here, I took a step closer to him biting my lip, "to be with you."

"What is this?" Karen inquired.

"This is conversation flirt. You could do this any kind of way. You could ask shy questions to your crush that shows your likings. Or if you two are already talking, you could fit a compliment or something into it. Now try it on me." I informed her. She stood there thinking of something, which took too long so I gave her a push.

"Oh Karen! The dance is coming up, do you know who you'll ask yet?" I questioned her in my impression of Madeleine's nasally light voice. "I can't wait to see Brad!"

"I-I think I know who I'll ask." Karen started off slowly, seeing where this was going. "I think the person I wanna go with is right in front of me.."

"That's great!" Kevin and I jumped our sister in a proud bear hug. She kept whining about holding her too tightly, we didn't care.

"Oh Ken, our little sister is becoming such a little flirt!" My brother commented.

"Oh yes Kev, she's learning from the best!" I agreed. "Now you've learned the basic flirting, let's _seduce_." I winked mischievously at her. Kare shoved her way out of our hold.

"Can't I just flirt with Mad? I-I don't think seducing h-her is necessary.."

"Ah ah. Rule 1: Seducing is ALWAYS needed." Kevin declared with power. "Do you and Mad change in the same room? Or do you have your own little girl privacy?"

"W-we change in the s-same room.." Our sister's face painted a faint pink with shame. I could tell she's peeked at Madeleine's body before, I grinned knowing that she gets her pervert side from us.

"Alright, so the next time you two change, try sneaking your way into these few tactics. You could A, compliment her body. B, help her change her clothes and 'accidentally' touch a delicate part. Or C, act like you want to wrestle with her when she's shirtless, pants-less or both." Kevin instructed. "Now watch as Kenny and I demonstrate tactic B, since I'm sure you already know how to compliment Mad."

He nodded to me and I started the act. We pretended to start changing our clothes.

"Uhm, let me help you take that off..." I suggested, walking towards Kevin and acting like I was taking off his shirt, and just glanced the bottom of his chest. I blushed furiously, this is just too much.

"That's how you do tactic B, you could do the same with taking off her pants. But remember, only LIGHTLY touch her, and don't apologize. Pretend like you didn't notice it." Kevin advised. "Here's tactic C." Again, we 'changed' our clothes.

"Hey Ken, think fast!" My brother playfully tackled me onto the bed and we tussled all over. His close proximity and the grabs he did just made me dizzy from how hard my heart was pounding. While we wrestled, I looked into his face to see if he shared the same feelings. Kevin had a faint blush, his green eyes glazed with regret, I sighed. Karen abruptly interrupted my thoughts and fight.

"What if Mad doesn't want to wrestle me? You know she sorta has Craig's bad temper, she could fight me for real."

"Yes, however you're forgetting that Madeleine loves wrestling. She won't pass up a chance." I reminded her. "Ok now let's see you do all of this on us."

"Kevin, Kenny! I have cheer leading in-" She glanced at her watch. "In 26 minutes."

"Well, you better learn these moves quickly then." My brother said flatly.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Sorry if these flirts seem stupid, I'm not an expert on it XD** **  
><strong>


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I apologize for the grammar mistakes in the last chapters and probably the chapters to come everyone! I promise I'll try rereading it better, I feel so stupid! Dx Please forgive me for my fails!  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 10: Food Bagging, Discipline Talk, and More<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Monday, Lunch room)<strong>

"Get this, I've heard that a senior named James failed 6 times and got expelled from 3 schools." Clyde whispered dramatically, I rolled my eyes. The dude never knows when to quit it with the rumors.

"Clyde, man, you do realized you've only _heard_ this, right? There's a great chance that James hasn't done all that. And how do you think he feels about you spreading this?" Token reasoned uselessly.

"No, no. What _you_ don't realize is that there is still a chance that it is true. Plus, I'm not 'spreading' the gossip, I'm just announcing it secretly." The brunette explained.

"I-I don't t-think t-that-ngh-is what T-Token m-means…" Tweek stammered. Before the 3 could go on talking about the idiot spreading or announcing the rumors, a thought occurred to me.

"Dude, you didn't tell anyone what I told about Kenny right? Because if you did, I'll seriously murder you."

"Of course not! Would I be so foolish, cruel, and childish to tell everyone the juicy sad secret about Kenny McCormick?" He questioned, acting defended.

"Yes, you would." All of us answered blankly. The brunette nodded his head.

"Yea, you're right. Although, I made an exception and didn't announce Kenny's secret. Oh though, how good this rumor is! And it's a _true_ rumor, eek! Maybe I could just tell La-" I punched his arm to remind him the promise he made.

"Sp-speaking of w-which, did-ngh-you g-get e-enough p-proof t-that Kenny is Guy?" Tweek asked.

"Yea, I'm pretty sure he is." I went on to tell them the clues I have found when I spoke to him last time. That Guy had revealed to me: He had quit his prostitution like Kenny, He has a little sister like Kenny, He has low self esteem like Kenny, He likes to be called a 'prostitute' instead of a whore like Kenny, and then I recalled the part about his love life. Which lead me to recall the obvious crush he has on me.

"There's this o-other thing.." I began reluctantly. "The bastard likes me, and I'm starting to think I like him back. What should I do? Stripe told me I should ignore my feelings, but is that the right decision?"

My friends tensed at when I said I'm thinking I like Kenny too, then created a weird look when I mentioned the advice my guinea pig gave me. They don't understand, or anyone, that I could speak to my pet when she talks. People even dare to say I'm, '_delusional_'. Retards.

"I-I think y-you should just t-tell him h-how-ack-you feel. I k-know you're s-scared about l-liking s-someone but k-keeping it in I-isn't right either." The jittery teen suggested.

"Mhm, Kenny's different. Maybe what happened last time won't happen again with him. Plus, Craig, think about this REAL hard. If you keep ignoring your feelings forever, you'll turn out badly. You even said Kenny wants to help you with your past. And if you and him can date each other, then that's even better. You already seem to show much more emotion now than before." Token agreed.

"I don't know, maybe being friends with the guy is good enough-" Clyde started.

"Associates, you mean." I corrected.

"_Associates, _then. But that should be good enough. I could understand why you would be scared to like someone again, after what happened with her. Right now is not the time for you to get intimate with somebody, you're not prepared." Clyde stated. "I got your back on either choice Craiggers, it's your decision on what to do here."

I concentrated hard. If I tell Kenny I like him, (which I'm still not sure _why_ I like him) then we'll date. Though that'll lead to the chance of the incident that happened a few years ago. I don't want that to arise again. If I don't tell him I like him, then there really won't be a problem. Just that I could never give him my affections, or I'll get his. I'll have to see this bastard everyday until he moves out, and ignore my feelings. I would probably go deeper into my state of not showing my emotions. Damnit, why am I always the person to choose between 2 difficult choices? And what if Kenny confesses to me, not the other way around? Then what will I do? Reject the poor guy? Accept him? If I do, I might put him in more pain. If I don't, I'll put myself and perhaps him in pain too. I groaned frustrated.

"I don't know what I'm going to do.."

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I'm with my gang at the lunch table like regular. Today we're eating something that looks like it's been chewed by a goat, then spitted out, I munched it down anyway.

"Wendy was wonderful. We watched this scary movie and she was practically sitting in my lap." Stan gushed about their date. "She has this adorable way of eating popcorn, oh my gosh I can't explain it, but you guys have GOT to see it!"

"Oh, I know how she eats it Stanley. I was sitting right there, 2 rows ahead." Cartman grinned smugly. "The lovebirds here were so kissy kissy it was disgusting!"

"You turd! We had a good night until we stumble upon this whale crouching behind us with a camera!" Stan glared at the big boned teen. He turned his stare at Kyle. "And you knew that he was spying?"

"Y-Yea…sorry." The red head blushed shamefully. "So what happened next, you went home with her and did the whoopee?" Kyle laughed teasingly, though again, I saw behind it and caught the abrupt sadness in his eyes.

"NO! I walked h-her home…" Stan trailed off, he fidgeted.

"_And?_" I prodded.

"That's it." I rolled my eyes in impatience. "Hey, this is getting boring. What about your weekend with Kyle? Did you get a job?"

"Indeed. I'm so proud of him!" The Jew gave my head a ruffle. "He's even wearing his real hair."

"That's do to the fact that you've _burned_ my wig.." I muttered darkly, crossing my arms.

"Haha, you actually set it on fire?" Cartman snorted.

"I couldn't help myself! As soon as Kenny got accepted to a new job, I dragged him to my house and put it to flames, in celebration."

"You call that a celebration!" I burst with slight anger, though more teasing.

"In my eyes they are." Kyle deadpanned.

"Anyways, before you two start arguing, I'm guessing you're better now, Kenny? And what's your new job?"

"Y-yea, I g-got a little braver.." I fiddled with my fingers out of my shyness and self esteem. "I work a-at an grocery store, bagging food. At Finney's Market."

"That's excellent." Cartman clapped my back heartily. "When do you start?"

"Today actually, I arrive there about an hour after school ends. I work for 3 hours on weekdays and 5 on weekends." I informed them proudly. I still have a chance of supporting my family and making myself useful in life.

"We'll come see ya for sure." Stan promised. "By the way how's it going with your associate, Cold Corpse Craig?"

"It's getting better." I chirped. "I flirted with him and-"

"Oh yea! Let me tell you how Ken _babbled_ about Craig on Saturday." Kyle laughed uncontrollably. "He acted just like a lovesick schoolgirl. He went on chattering about Craig's _gorgeous_ eyes and how _cute_ he blush it was pathetic!"

"Sh-shut up! I'm not like Stan." I pointed out, my face heating.

"What's that's suppose to mean?" The raven snapped. "I don't babble over Wendy!" For the next 15 minutes we argued over who talks about their crush more. I won, _mwuahaha._

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Walk home)<strong>

Why am I always stuck with the girl? I usually have Kenny with me, though he's on this new job. And Mads is at her fucking tutoring session. I glanced down miserably at the chattering violet eyed girl.

"And Jasmine was all like, 'Courtney, your form is all wrong!' Then Courtney got in her face and did like a triple back flip!" LM exclaimed about her cheer-leading practice. "It was amazing! Oh did I mention that Courtney is the captain? Why would Jasmine talk say that to her? So idiotic. Oh then I was like-"

"Look, I don't really care what, 'you was like', okay?" I informed her intimately. LM gave me a hard stare and pouted.

"Fine, I'll just tell my LOVING brothers about it. Speaking of which, I'm so happy Kenny has a new job. I feel that he's more safer now." She smiled contently.

"What is his new job anyway?" I questioned, I keep hearing about it but not the actual thing.

"He works at Finney's Market, he bags the groceries." Karen informed. "Isn't it great that he's improving himself from the last job he had?"

Finney's Market? My mom shops there sometimes. I can't believe the brunette went from asking, 'You wanna good time big boy?' to, 'Paper or plastic?'. It was actually quite hilarious. Except it was also wonderful that Kenny could so easily move on from his problems, unlike me. Damnit ignore the emotion, ignore it! Wait did LM asked me about the _last_ job he had?

"Hold on, so you know that I know about Kenny's prostitution?" I inquired. She looked up at me smugly.

"He is my brother if you didn't recalled. Ken tells Kevin and I everything." LM paused and glanced at me. "Does that mean you accept him now?"

***Karen's POV***

"Accept?" Craig echoed. "I wouldn't say that, but I tolerate him better than I used to." I saw something flash in his cold silver eyes.

"Ok you tolerate him, so you like him now?"

"No, I could just stand to be with him now." The raven grudged, I sighed impatient.

"Why can't you simply admit that you like my brother and live with it? Everyone can see that you do."

The older boy's face lightly tainted pink, I raised an eyebrow understanding the situation he has with accepting his likings for Kenny(even though I didn't mean _that_ kind of like), wanting to reject it. I know how he feels, I didn't accept my crush on Mads until just recently. I pushed my desires for her away, thinking I shouldn't feel this way for a girl and that I'd be rejected. Now I've accepted them for what they are and I want to tell Mad how I feel, I don't know what's keeping Craig from confessing to Kenny, however I hope he'll eventually accept it.

"How was it like, living with Kenny while he was a whore?" The raven asked after a short moment of silence.

"He prefers to be called, a 'prostitute'. It was tough, every time he went out there and gave himself to complete strangers…I was scared. It made me feel better to know that sometimes Kevin would be with him, although then that meant both my brothers are in danger. All I could do is sit at home praying they'd be back. The times when Kenny disappears, when he dies, are the worst. And he had started failing some classes from falling asleep, he didn't get enough rest since he was out at night. Kenny'll put on a smile but I know that he's hurting. I'm so grateful he's showing himself and quit his prostitution."

There's a whole lot more I could have mentioned, like the nights of crying at my self to sleep, waking up crying. How my parents got much worse at being alcohol and drug addicts, using most of what they earned into getting the items. How we starved and Kevin and Kenny would dip into their cash, buying us food. How Kevin might come home with bruises and Kenny reappearing 2 months later. How I used to look in Ken's eyes and saw the fake orbs that blinked back at me, not his hazel ones. How I stopped eating, even when I had food I refused. How I would sometimes smell beer or weed on my brother's breath and know they took some out of our parents stash to help them go through the bad days. How I would get random women and men at my door, waiting for one my brothers (or both) to get them laid. How they'd give _them_ a good night, and not me. How they try to console me, and I'll be difficult. How I used to secretly peek through the holes in my walls or through Kevin's bed room door and watch as him and Kenny making out, since I was too afraid to help give them comfort. That's all I felt I could do for them, was to watch. Yea, I could have mentioned a lot more, but I didn't. I only said what I thought was needed, like to the many counselors at my school who questioned my living conditions.

"I appreciate your brother LM, you're lucky to have him." Craig acclaimed, avoiding his eyes from me. "Don't tell the bastard this, but I wish to be like him. Note that doesn't mean I _like_ him. I just approve of his trait moving on from hardships. Kenny is very...strong.."

The teen's face held that trade mark blank face, however his eyes (If looked closely) displayed something different. The silver orbs shown with adoration, flecked with depression. What is troubling him so horribly that's blocking his emotions towards my brother? He spoke again.

"He's strong, but an retard. You should have seen his face when he first bit into that sausage biscuit, it was amusing." Craig's lips curled gently into a grin, at that moment I could see what Kenny saw attractive in this block face. The Tucker is that kind of person who reveals nothing much of himself, yet you'll see little signs of the real person inside. That tiny grin on his face was just handsome, and remembering about my brother's silliness brought it there. I chuckled lightly into my hand. I'm starting to enjoy being with him.

"Although Kenny's not as retarded as you are, with your boring cheer-leading stories." He snorted.

"Boring? You talk to that rat of yours for fun!" I retorted, ok I _was_ starting to enjoy being with him.

"Take that back you dirty little runt! Stripe is anything but a rat. She's a delicate glass angel!" Craig growled. I face palmed, I'm going to have to teach a 15 year old that guinea pigs don't have wings and aren't saints.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

"Aww, thanks sonny. What's a cute smart looking young boy like you doing labor here like this?" An elder looking old woman asked me as I gave her her bags. _Well, a boy like me is__ working here because I quit having sex for money, if you really needed to know._

"Y-You're t-to kind, ma-madame. I-I'm just d-doing my j-job." I stuttered out loud, blushing. The senior reached her frail hands to grab her packed items, gave me a sweet smile and left. Inside I was violently panicking, why'd I let Kyle talk me into getting one of the most social jobs on this planet? That woman had just called me cute, when I'm not wearing my contacts or wig! She thinks I'm cute just the way I am. But screw her right now, people is everywhere, looking and talking to me! And I have to pack the food into the bags correctly or I'll get in trouble. This is too much _pressure!_ Ok, I understand how Tweek feels now. This is my first day and I'm already freaking out. I thought I could do this, be brave! Remember why I'm doing this, to help my family, make my friends not worry, prove myself to myself. Perfect, I'm ready.

"Uhm, McCormick? The customer is waiting." Christine, the cashier told me kindly. I glanced at the man who was staring at me in anger, then at the bread, tomatoes, and eggs that sat to be in the bags.

"ACK! I-I'm so sorry sir!" I hurriedly stuffed them into plastic bags and handed them to him, he snatched it.

"Humpf, that's why we don't need ignorant little kids to work in places like this!" He gruffed. Strangely, I was used to the insult, having been talk down to for a while by grown people. Christine gave me an apologizing smile as she checked out the other customer's foods, I nodded understanding. After I got the next two people out, I heard my friend's teasing voices behind me.

"Look at our boy men, hasn't he grown so much?" Cartman praised, taking in my uniform. Which consisted of a black shirt, white apron, white visor, and black pants.

"Aww I know right. He looks like he's barbequing with that adorable hat he has on." Kyle commented pointing at me.

"Hey, who wants to bet how many times Kenny asks 'Paper or plastic?' a day here?" Stan snickered.

"No, no even better. Let's bet how many times a blonde girl answers, 'It doesn't matter, I'm bi-sacksual!'" Cartman sneered, the lot of them cracked up. I was mortified.

"_Guys!_" I hissed, blushing furiously. They really know how to poke at me. "You can't just stand there, you have to buy something. This is a store!" They all looked to each other and shrugged.

"Alright with us." Kyle said, the three of them going off the get something. A few minutes later I see them in line in my lane. They bought chips, pop, candy, and...broccoli? I gave them a 'what the fuck?' face.

"Shut up my mom needs some." Cartman defended himself. I shook my head at them and packed the food.

"Hey Ken, you organize those chips with the pop so professionally." Stan laughed.

"Ya, he needs to teach me this talent of bagging food." Kyle inserted. I grinded my teeth.

"G-Guys..did you just c-come here to m-mock me?" I seethed. Cartman smiled sweetly at me.

"We would never put you in a position like that Kenny, we're not _that_ repulsive. You said you work for 3 hours so we came to pick you up after your shift."

"I'm not even done working yet t-" I started.

"Actually you could leave now McCormick, we're having a slow day anyways." Courtney generously offered. "Jeffery will take your place."

"T-Thanks Courts."

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><p>We started walking towards Kyle's house, to have another study date, after I had called the Tucker's and told them where I'll be. They insisted that since I have a new job, I have more time to catch up on my grades.<p>

"So how was your first time dude?" Cartman teased. "Out on your _big__ shot_ career."

"I-It was terrible. P-People was l-LOOKING at m-me, and t-TALKING!" I complained idiotically.

"Ha, Kyle's right you are becoming like Tweek." Stan shook his head amused. "Did anyone call you ugly or anything?"

"Well..this elderly woman said I looked cute..." I pouted as my gang roared laughing.

"Pedophiles man, everywhere. Even when you're not on your corner." Kyle stated.

"She wasn't a pedophile! Just a nice old lady. B-but do I really look ok without my c-costume?"

"YES, YOU DO." They groaned in unison. An old part of myself disbelieved them, the new, stronger, part of myself believed them. I guess I'll take the new part.

"F-fine. What are we going to study today?"

"You are so weak in social studies that I bet you can't remember how many continents there are. We're starting with that." Kyle notified, I huffed.

"I HATE social studies. Oh but I love math, I even helped Craig do his algebra. He said that it's 'shitting useless'. You should have seen his concentrated face as he tried doing this problem, it was so fascinating. And the way when he doesn't understand the question he chews on his eraser it's-" My mouth was covered by Cartman's hand.

"Jesus _Christ_. I see what you mean Kyle when he just goes on talking about him. If I didn't stop him from babbling he probably would have went all night." The big boned teen stated.

"Yhup, it's nice to watch how his face brightens though." Kyle agreed.

"Hey if Kenny gets to chatter about Craig, then I could of Wendy. Ok, her hair blowing in the wind is soo fucking sexy-" Stan's mouth got covered by my hand. Noway was I'm getting forced to listen for hours about how hot Wendy is.

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

I moronically walked into Kevin's (my old room, I like to say) room. I had planned after a long thought to seize this chance to talk about my problem with liking Kenny. I thought if anyone, I could talk to the person who has been within a relationship with him. Who probably knows how to deal with love trouble, and keep a secret. However it took me until I entered the room to realize that the oldest McCormick son is still catching or on the bus coming home from school. Kenny had once told me that Kevin wanted to go to a different high school then south park's, saying he needs more variety. I suddenly remembered that I was suppose to speak with Mads about LM, though not revealing her crush. I stepped out the door in pursue of my mission, when I got halted in the hallway by Carol and Stuart. The fuck?

"Get out of my way please, I would like to speak with my sister in my own house." I grunted, they glanced anxiously at each other.

"If you'd let us s-speak with you for a m-moment?" Carol asked slowly. I shifted and rested my weight on one side of my hip.

"Sure, talk."

"We mean, in the privacy of the guestroom." Stuart explained. I rolled my eyes and followed the punks inside the room. It reeked of some kind of inhaling drug, I scrunched my nose up. Carol picked up a can of air freshener and sprayed around the area.

"You've told us yesterday that you know what we did...could you tell us what you know exactly?" Stuart whispered seriously. I rolled my eyes again, so this is what it was all about?

"I smelled you two smoking in here like the dipshits you are. Any other questions?" I demanded.

"...C-can you not t-tell anyone else w-what you know?" Carol asked nervously, pulling her fingers. I was purely shocked.

"Are. You. KIDDING ME? That's all you two care about isn't it. Your selves and your precious beer and weed. You don't dare think about your children do you?"

"Listen here young man, you don't understand. We love our kids with all our-" I cut the husband off.

"Then why don't you show that 'love' uh?"

"I know it's hard to comprehend, but we do love our kids Craig. How did you think we felt when our two sons had became prostitutes?" Carol inquired depressingly.

"...Y-you know about that?"

"Of course we do, they are our children. Though really, when Karen was crying in her sleep, she wailed some words about them unconsciously . We overheard, but did nothing." Carol explained regretfully, glancing towards Stuart.

"What has begun we didn't try to stop. We let them did what they've done. We felt we had no right to, we caused them to go this far. But damn it, they made us proud! We now know our kids don't think we're pathetic or horrible parents. They're doing everything in their power to help us." He sniffled, tearing up a little.

"Indeed. Although the pain into watching and knowing what they were doing, was too much. So we took our easiest comfort and did drugs. Oh and little Karen..she cried so, so much." Carol sobbed into her hand. "We long to help our children get the life they deserve, but we don't know what to do. We love our kids, Craig, trust us we do. Yet we don't think our kids know that we love them..."

"I'll tell you what you _adults_ need to do. You need to stop doing this pitiful shit of drugs and spend some more time with your children. Do you guys even know that Karen got accepted into cheer-leading?" I ordered. Their eyes widen, Carol gasped.

"S-she did? Oh my baby, how couldn't I know.."

"Perhaps because you're too involved with drugs to give a damn. You call yourselves parents? Please, contact me when you get your lives together. That's _your_ 1st step." I told them, leaving and slamming the door. I was aware that I was kinda rough on them, I didn't care. They needed to realize how their mistakes are affecting Kenny, Kevin, and Karen. One affect they already found out was that their sons prostituted themselves, at least only one is doing it now. Now that I'm hyped up, I feel like turning around and going straight back to their room and talk some more. However, they need to figure it out on their own on what should be done.

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><p><strong>Yaay I've finally published it, hooray!<strong> **Sorry for long wait!** _If you're happy and you know it, review review! If you're happy and you know it, review review! If you're happy and you know it and you really wanna show it, if you're happy and you know it, review review!_


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Yayz another long chapter title!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 11: Fighting, Advice, Flashbacks, First kiss<br>**

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Early Tuesday, Attic)<br>**

My eyes unwilling blinked open to the light that had came on. I looked to my right and saw Kenny rummaging around in his drawers. How many times is he going to break rule 2? As my squinting eyes got used to the light, I noticed that he only had his shorts on, shit. I averted my eyes to the clock on the wall and it read 1:23 am.

"Kenny, what the _hell_ are you doing?" I groaned, sitting up. The brunette turned around to me with a face painted with pure fright.

"K-Kevin, h-he's not home yet. He went on his job, I have to find him." He answered frantically, pulling out random clothing and throwing them on. Kenny was biting his lip and was sweating.

"Dude, calm down. It's only been some hours, he'll be back in the morning. Go to sleep." I consoled, trying to make him feel better.

"I can't, I have to go find him Craig. You d-don't understand. I owe my brother a lot, if it were me out there, I know he'd search for me if it was possible. I'm leaving."

I watched silently as Kenny hurriedly yanked out clothes and pulled them on. He must have a lot of guilt to think he owes Kevin for caring for him. Guilt is pushing the hazel eyed boy to go out on the streets to find his brother. I sighed, if he goes alone it'll be too dangerous.

"Wait, I'm going with you." I tiredly got up and went over to my totes and pulled off my T-shirt. I didn't have my own drawers since I left that for Kevin.

"Y-You are, you s-sure?" He flabbergasted.

"Yes, it's too deadly if you go alone. I don't want you to come up missing as well." Without warning, I felt a pair of arms wrap around my exposed upper body from behind, I shivered. Kenny's hands touching my bare skin, forcing me to be pressed against the brunette's chest, his breath tickled my neck.

"Eek I'm so happy, you're _caring_ for me!" Kenny cheered, nuzzling his cheek onto my shoulder. I flushed violently at the fondling.

"I-I've never said I c-cared. L-let me g-go!" I ordered, attempting to wiggle my way out of his hold, he just held tighter, my breathing hitched.

"Oh c'mon, I could tell you're enjoying this Craig." He purred, his hands rubbing up and down across my sides. I tried my best to resist the urge to fall victim to the flirts. I grabbed the shirt I just took off and whacked it in Kenny's face, causing him to release me.

"Don't…ever gr-grab me like that a-again McCormick!" I advised seriously. The response I got was a giggle.

"You're too _cute_ sometimes. You know that?" My blush deepen and I smacked my pillow at his head next.

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><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

It's 2:30 am and I'm wandering around the streets with Craig next to me. I've just notice that I'm putting him in danger just by being with me out here. I'm done being a prostitute, however people still know me. People who have a grudge against me especially, knows me. If they discover someone I know besides Kevin, they'll hurt them. I glanced worriedly at Craig, I've gotta get my brother and bring them back home safe.

"I don't want to seem like 'that' guy but, do you know where we're headed?" The raven asked standing close to me, looking around alertly. I guess I'm more calmer, since I'm used to being out here at night. However I was surprised that I didn't tense or get timid at his nearness.

"Yea, Kevin told me before he left about his appointment with Ms. Donders. I know where she lives, so we're going to go there first."

"Has your brother been late from coming from a client before?"

"Rarely. Only about 3 times, when it does happen Karen and I go ballistic with worry, he _is_ our older brother. Kevin is much more heedful than I am when it comes to these situations. However, no matter what gets in our way, we still work and try to get our lives back together. And help our parents, it's a goal for us."

"Oh yea. Your mom and dad spoke to me yesterday. We sorta talked about you and your siblings." Craig informed me, flipping his bang out of his right eye. I jerked my attention towards him.

"W-what? What did th-they say?" His face was blank, though his eyes shown hesitation.

"Well basically, they just asked me not to tell anyone about them smoking the drugs. Then I insulted them saying that you, Karen, and Kevin don't matter to them. Your parents got offended and told me how much they love you, though not sure if you guys know that. They said that they knew you two are whores in business-"

"_Prostitutes_." I reminded.

"Whatever. When LM had been crying in her sleep, she spoke some words about ya'll, that's how they found out. They didn't feel like they should have done anything that you guys decided. Since you were doing it for them, they realized that you didn't think that they were pathetic. Your parents claimed that they try to get better for you, they don't know how though. It really peed me off, so I sorta yelled at them...sorry if you didn't appreciate that. You ok?"

"Oh Craig, they love us..." I sobbed softly into my hand. "They knew about us, and they still love us..." My kin and I decided to hide the secret from our parents mostly because we thought they'd stop us, or scold and reject us as their children. Yet they knew all along and still love us. We actually felt they loved the drugs more than us. They actually thought _we_ thought they were pathetic and reject them. How could they feel that way, yes they might seem like the worst parents in another person's view, but they're the best mom and dad they could be.

"I-I'm so happy Craig.." I whimpered cheerfully. "I wish I could speak to them now." He gaped at me.

"What? Aren't you angry? They knew you were who-prostitutes I mean, and didn't do anything to stop you."

"Y-Yea, but they love us! Besides, even if they did try to stop us, they couldn't. Mom and Dad just respected our wishes of trying to help the family, I love them so much." I smiled contently. Craig gazed at me, his silver orbs glazed over in deep thought.

"You know, I r-really ad-admire you." He started, looking away. My heart skipped a beat at the sudden compliment. "You could d-do the worst things p-possible, a-and still find something good out of i-it and sm-smile like you just did r-right now...I w-wish to be like y-you."

"C-Craig, why? Believe me, you want to be anything _but_ me." I insisted, amazed. He's that last person I'd think of to admire me. Wait, scratch that, nobody would admire me.

"No, I do. I'm still affected by something that happened to me and I can't get over it, and here you are healing from your scars." The raven fidgeted with his fingers, something I thought he never does. "I'm s-starting to d-do something I don't t-think I should b-because o-of what happened to m-me back then. What do y-you think I should do?"

***Craig's POV***

After I asked him for advice when I told him about my problem (not giving away too much info), Kenny's face took on a painting of shock. He was going to answer, until out of no where we saw Kevin up ahead. The earring wearing teen was fighting a big grown man with a white hat, who was picking up a glass bottle as a weapon.

"KEVIN!" Kenny bolted towards the older guy, jumping on top of his back, knocking him down harshly. I watched frozen as the brunette jabbed at the man's face with his fists, blood gushing out his nose. The white hat man used his large hands (That covered Kenny's whole face) to slap him off. I didn't catch the scene when he fell, because I saw another man with a gray mask on choking Kevin up against a building. I got control of my body again and was going to help. Before I could, I heard a glass shatter, a sharp pain spread across my back. I spun around to catch a punch right in the face. A 3rd man stood over me with a gun in one hand, a freshly broken wine bottle in the other.

"Shit..." I groaned, getting up and wincing from the pain in my back. I fought before, though never anyone with a gun. I was fucking scared, my heart pounded threatening to burst from my chest.

"That's correct sweetie, you're in shit." The man chuckled vilely.

He charged at me, aiming the glass towards my stomach. Since he was the heavier between us, I was quicker and dodged it, maneuvering a high kick to his face. The man cursed and slammed the gun down on my head. The excruciating pain caused me to become dizzy, opening myself for another hit. The man kneed me above my hip and I collapsed over. He then settled on top of me, grazing my cheeks with the glass bottle distressingly. I screamed from the stings and landed a good punch at his neck. The man yowled and penetrated the glass in my left arm, I screeched again. He didn't stop, yanking me up by my hair and banging my head against a close trash can. I blacked out for a moment from all the blows to my skull. For a blissful second, everything was quiet, I didn't feel no pain. Then I heard Kenny's scream in anguish, that knocked me right back into action. I opened my eyes and glanced around quickly. I caught the brunette's body, his legs were getting clubbed violently with a bat by the white hat man. My heart stopped beating at the sight. My head was still being jerked everywhere by the man, I kicked him right in the groin. He let go and screamed, I snatched away the glass bottle and pierced it into his back several times before I was sure he wasn't getting back up. I ran over to Kenny, still holding my weapon, and stabbed the glass into the man's neck. He dropped the bat and stumbled over. I was going to crouch down to the brunette, when the person I fought pointed the gun at me.

"Say goodbye Babe!" He fired the metal.

"NO!" Kenny jumped in front of me, his back facing the bullets.

"Crap, I told you not to shoot the pistol Ed! Fuck run, I'm not gonna be under murder charges." The man with the gray mask who was fighting Kevin stopped and ran off, so did the other men. I swing my eyes back to the teen in front of me, his face dripped with crimson blood from the top of his head. His mouth and nose drooling blood as well. He had a long scratch that lined vertically on his left eye. The moment made my breathing stop again, _this is all too familiar._

"K-Kenny? Kenny are you ok?" I yelled, shaking him lightly. Luckily, he nodded slowly and coughed a bit of the red fluid. I repositioned so he was on my lap, in my arms.

"Are..y-you ok?" He choked out. My eyes filled with tears for some reason. _This is all too familiar._

"Am _I_ ok? You took like 4 bullets for me! Why would you do that?" I sobbed. Kenny smiled weakly. _This is all too familiar._

"Because if you got hit, I wouldn't be able to get the chance to see that cute way you blush anymore. Remember, I'll come back, don't worry." The dieing boy raised his hand to wipe my scratched cheeks of my tears.

"P-please..." I begged, heart aching. _This is all too familiar._

"C-Craig, about-argh-that problem y-you told me earlier. I-I think y-you should just listen to y-your heart..." Kenny coughed up more blood, his body started trembling.

"That's way too hard! Stay with me please. St-stay with me!" I wailed pleading, _this is all too familiar_. He blinked slowly, then brought my face down closer to him. Kenny pressed his lips my cheek where there was less scratches, I cried more. _This is all too familiar._

"I love you..." The brunette whispered before his hazel eyes went dull and lifeless, still staring deathly at me. I bawled loudly, clutching him against me. _This is all too familiar._

"He'll be ok, I promise." A deep voice said behind me, I flinched and turned around, expecting another man to beat us up. It was just Kevin, crouching down close to me and snaking his arms around my shoulders delicately. He embraced me while I still held Kenny's dead body in my lap.

"It'll be ok Craig, I was like this my first time I saw him die too, I was worse, but it'll be ok. Hopefully he'll come back soon." Kevin spoke comfortably, rubbing circles in my back. "Cry it out, it'll make it easier."

So I did, for some reason, I sobbed onto Kenny's bloodied body. I didn't know why I was crying in the first place for his death, knowing he'd be back. I didn't know why I was so effected by him saying he loves me. I didn't know why I felt a deja vu to this event. I didn't know why I had pleaded for Kenny to stay. I didn't know why I wished I had said I loved him back. I didn't know why I had some sort of regret building up in my heart. I didn't know why I wished Kenny would have kissed my lips, not my cheeks. I didn't know why I wished _I'd_ had kissed him. I didn't know why I was mourning his death. I didn't know why I wished the bullets would have hit me, not him. I didn't know why his advice to listen to my heart was hard. I didn't know why a sudden flash back came in to mind.

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><p><em>"The young girl's beautiful indigo hair was drenched in blackish red blood. Her mouth forever frozen in shaping a word that would never be spoken. Her neck cracked in a strange deformed way. The girl's stomach appears as if a bomb had exploded inside it. The officials do not know who caused this shameful manslaughter, but their doing everything in their power to discover any clues. Here's are some comments from the poor girl's family..." The news reporter on the television announced. Mads sitting next to me, grabbed my hands, shedding some tears.<br>_

_"I'm so sorry Craig, I knew how much you loved her." She sympathized, her eye brows furrowed. "I can't believe someone would kill her in such a disgusting way!" I simply looked at her with a detached face and back at the T.V. The screen displayed my lover's mauled, mangled body.  
><em>

_"I'm fine Madeleine." I spoke toneless for the first time. "Everything is fine."_

_"No you're not, someone had just murdered you're girlfriend! You're outraged, depressed, lost, scared, everything!" Mads exclaimed worriedly. _

_"I'm fine Mad." I repeated, voice shaking. "Everything is fine."_

_"The murdered victim died in an horrible, terrible way. Whoever done this must live with this on their minds forever. The young lady's parents informed us that she was always happy, doing her homework..." The reporter chattered._

_"Craig. I'm so, so sorry." It wasn't until my sister leaned her head on me, I started crying. Not really out of grief. However more out of regret. "She loved you a lot you know that right?"_

_"Y-yes...she did love me. Just not enough.." I whimpered, replying._

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><p>I think I know why, now.<p>

"Craig, you g-good? I don't m-mean to ruin your m-mourning, but-argh-I'm afraid m-more of those guys will come back. Plus we n-need to get a hospital, too much b-blood is escaping our bodies." Kevin informed painfully, breaking me out of my trance. I had stop sobbing into Kenny's jacket, though his older brother was still holding me. When he mentioned 'hospital', the pain in my wounds seemed to come back full force.

"W-err-what about Kenny?" I questioned, wincing from speaking. "When he comes back to life, does-_ouch_-this body d-disappear or he comes back in the same body?"

"He returns in the same one. S-so, when we have to put him in a s-safe spot and c-come back for him after-argh-we get done at the hospital." I hugged the dead corpse tighter.

"We-we have to leave him?" I panted, the blood leaving me is causing me to get dizzy.

"Yes. I k-know it's tough but we got t-to. We'll get h-him back and carry him h-home though. I p-promise. C'mon Craig, y-you're more injured t-than I am." Kevin took Kenny from me and carried him into a nearby bush. He slugged back towards me and offered me a hand. I took it and stood, wobbling.

"The closet hospital is-argh-that way.." I pointed. Leaning on each other, we limped our way towards help. "...Thank you K-Kevin, for comforting-argh-me back there..I'm g-grateful for it."

"Hm. No problem-urgh-you're like a little brother to me, C-Craig." He smiled adoringly, though I saw that it hurt. "I-I should be thanking you-urgh-though. I would h-have been killed if i-it wasn't for you and K-Kenny."

"W-what happened anyway?" I asked, he shrugged gently.

"T-the usual. P-people thought I-er-have money and t-they try t-to get it."

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><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(<strong>**Days later)**

I woken up to see a wooden ceiling, and realize that I'm back in the attic. Funny, this time I was in Heaven. I laid on the futon, with a blanket on top of me. Slowly, I turned my head to the left to see Craig reading a book. I looked at myself and saw I was fairly cleaned, not covered with dried blood like usual. As I sat up, the raven spotted me, coming over and sitting next to me.

"You're awake! I'm so glad. How are you?" He inquired me anxiously. I took in his appearance. He had bandages on his head and gauze on his cheeks and nose. One of his eyes were black, but it was the right one so it was mostly covered by the bang. I could tell he probably had some other wounds, but I didn't ask or wanted to see. How could I put him through this and he asks me if _I'm_ ok?

"Of course I am! My injuries are already healing. Look at you, I'm so sorry I did this. I should have made you stayed home." I moaned in misery. I put him right in the danger he was afraid I'd get in. He could have been killed.

"No, you can't make me do things Kenny, I'll do what I want. Yes I'm badly hurt but I'm better now. The casts could come off soon anyways. If you want to know, my skull has a curable crack, I have some infected stabs in my back, cheeks, and arm. Also a broken nose. Nothing much."

"It's not 'nothing much'!" I panicked, noticing that this is just what happened with Kevin and I. Speaking of Kevin, "How's my brother? Is he ok?"

"Yhup. Only a deep cut in the leg, lost tooth, busted lip and scratched ear." Craig informed me as if we were speaking about what kind of movies we like. Why is he acting like nothing happened? Oh wait, I have to look into his eyes to see the emotion. His silver orbs told me: relief, joy, regret, and something else.

"How long was I out? Could you tell me what happened when I was gone, like how the hell you carried my dead body up into the attic?" I asked.

"After you died Kevin hidden you in the bushes-"

"Bitch. Oops, sorry. Go on." I'm going to have to speak with him about where and not to hide me.

"Yea. Him and I went to the hospital to get our treatment. Next, we got you. It was still kinda late/early, so we sneaked you in to the attic, when Mads accidentally saw you. That took about 2 hours of explaining everything. We didn't think bringing up a search party again would be necessary, so we just told our parents that you were very sick and couldn't go to school. By the way it's Saturday, you've been dead for 4 days again." I sighed with ease, I wasn't gone too long.

"You're telling me that our parents believed I was just 'sick'? Didn't they see my blood-wait where is my blood?"

"In order for the lie to work, Kevin bathed you and covered your whole body with a blanket. We pretended to take care of you." I thought for a moment, it was a good lie. Except for one flaw.

"What if I didn't come back until like 3 months later?" Craig just stared at me for a minute.

"...We...haven't thought about that..." I face palmed and chuckled lightly. It would have been better if they'd just tell them the truth about my immortality. Everyone in the house already knows since Craig told Madeleine about me, not including the parents. The raven spoke again.

"Thank you Kenny, for taking the bullets for me, you saved my life." He said softly, looking down at his hands. Ah, that must of been the reason why I went to Heaven. I blushed, remembering the scenes of what happened before I had died.

"You're welcome, I would do it any day. So.." I started hesitantly. "I'm guessing you're not mad that I kissed your cheek?" Craig's face heated a vibrant pink, he pouted and looked away.

"O-of course I'm not!" He stuttered defiantly. "It w-was your l-last m-moments of living, I w-was caught u-up in the m-mood."

"Ah, I understand. So you wouldn't really mind if I kiss you...again?" Without waiting for an answer, I leaned forward and kissed his neck this time, I was scared to touch his injured cheeks. I pulled away speedily to see his face. Craig had a look of frustration, it appeared to seem like he was fighting against himself. His eyes glowed with depression and want. After some moments, he sighed and smacked my head. I guess he made up his mind of how to react.

"Kenny, please don't kiss or shitting touch me anymore, or as soon as I get these damn bandages off I'll kick your fucking ass." He growled, though blushing. My heart skipped. Ugh, I love how he curses with that attractive nasally voice. It's even double better when he's blushing so adorably with that angry face.

"Fine I won't kiss or touch you anymore." _For now_. The raven nodded and got up.

"I'm going to tell everyone you're better, I'll be back." Before he left I said,

"I love you, Craig. I just feel like I should tell you this one more time." He slammed the door. How cute?

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><p><strong>Yes Kenny, Craig slamming the door on you <em>is<em> cute!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Eeek chapter 12! We've gotten so far!**

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><p><strong>Chapter 12: Mr. Whisper and Conversations<br>**

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><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Sunday)<strong>

"Stripe, I know I haven't been speaking to you for the past few days, but now that Kenny is alive and gone I can tell you everything that happen." I begun, taking my best friend out of her burrow and sitting her on the bed next to me. The brunette was in Kevin's room, rejoicing with his siblings. He filled me in that every time he comes back from death or one of them goes missing, they always rejoice after they're together again. Stripe whistled.

"Yes it's about Kenny again. Look, the day that he died, he_ kissed_ my cheek. Even kissed my neck when he woke up!" She twitched her nose at me in shock.

"I know right? For some reason I couldn't help but want get kiss more by his lips, which are soft and plump by the way-damn it. I'm trying to ignore my feelings until I decide on what to do but he's making it hard for me. Tweek and Token think I should tell him, Clyde says I should just keep it under wraps, and Kenny thinks I should listen to my heart." Stripe flicked her ears.

"No, I didn't tell him I'm starting to like him. I said to him that I'm doing something I don't think I should be doing because of my past. The w-worst part is…that he confessed he loves me…" My heart fluttered at remembering the intense memory. Kenny's blood stained hazel eyes wavered, gazing at me. His trembling hand still softly caressing my cheek, and his lips worded those three words to me before he left life once more.

"A-At that time, I didn't know why my chest tighten and wanting to say I love him back. But now I do Stripe…it was because I was remembering _her_." My guinea pig crawled closer to me and pressed her wet pink nose on my hand.

"I'll be alright, thanks. I just don't know what to do…" I closed my eyes tight in irritation, I hate not knowing what to do, not knowing what is right. That's another reason how and why the incident happened, because I didn't know. My ignorance caused me to do something that should never be forgiven nor forgotten. And now I'm up and falling for someone else! How could I after what I've done, this isn't right. Stripe whistled a question.

"No, I still don't know why I'm starting to like him this way! Just think, a few weeks ago I was hating Kenny, now I'm loving him. This is crap…and that kiss, why did he have to kiss me? Why is he showing his love for me _now?_" I moaned in frustration. A thought occurred to me and I suddenly craved to read my letters to Mr. Whisper.

Mr. Whisper is my secret journal (Mads probably know, since she knows I talk to Stripe) that I wrote letters to while back in 7th grade. Everything you could ever want to know about me, my thoughts, feelings, lust, anger, hobbies, past, etc, is all in here. However, in the last pages of my journal, the letters are mostly jammed with my days of dating my girlfriend. All the confusion, passion, happiness, crime, remorse, betray, and pain that went on in the relationship is recorded with all the affection I held.

"Stripe, I'm going to read over my last letters to Mr. Whisper. I don't know why I'm having an urge to, yet I am." I kissed my friend's head adoringly and sat her back in her burrow. I slid my hand between my mattresses and pulled out my journal. It was simple looking to me. Mr. Whisper resembled a book, covered in black leather and crimson red stitched going around the edges. The middle area had a deep red round smiley face. Except the eyes were X's. I grinned sadly, Mads had gave me this. I opened up the cover and started reading my past.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I laid next to Kevin on his bed, we embraced each other closely in contentment, legs tangled together. My head rested on his chest, arms wrapped around his neck. My brother's chin nuzzled in my hair, his arms curled around my waist. Neither of us has spoken for a while, the only thing that has been said was, hello's, and how's your injuries going. After that, we dropped into a perfect silence. I was breathing in his ivy spring scent when I spoke up.

"I'm so sorry, I should have gotten there sooner. I should have known you were going to be in trouble. I should have given you my cell phone just in case, then you could have called. I shouldn't had let Craig come with me and get him hurt. I shouldn't have-"

"Shut hell up with the apologies." Kevin interrupted rudely. "You _should_ have done all those things. If it wasn't for you, I'd be dead. Heck, Craig would be dead too if you hadn't took those shots for him. I only care about you coming back alive Kenny."

"You were so badly hurt..." I peered up to his face. The swell in his lips seemed to went down a great deal, the scratch on his ear was closing, But Kevin still limped some when he used his left leg.

"So? My bandages get to come off tomorrow, and Craig's. I'll live."

"Fine...wait, you told the parents that I was sick. What did you tell them about your injuries?" I asked.

"We told them we fell down the stairs." Kevin answered simply, I laughed.

"I can't believe the lame lies you think of."

"Ah, I have to tell you. After you died, you should have seen Craig. He was crying and holding you so tight, it was touching."

"H-He did?" I blushed. "He really must be falling for me then..."

"Yea Kare told me that she could tell something is stopping him from accepting his feelings. I also heard you tell Craig that you loved him. You're becoming so bold." My face heated furiously.

"O-of course! It felt l-like the p-perfect time. You g-gave me that step, remember? Step 5: Confess to Craig. H-however, Craig doesn't seem to want a relationship w-with me yet.."

"You thought the last moments of you breathing was the perfect time to tell someone you love them?" Kevin chuckled. "That could be step 6: Get Craig to confess and date you!"

"Ughh how many steps are there left?" I groaned. "Step 6 is gonna be real hard. I mean I'm already sure he likes me, Craig hinted that yesterday while we went looking for you. He asked me what should he do, and I said listen to your heart. He revealed that he doesn't think it's right to like me because of what happened to him in the past, how could I help him when he's not telling me what happened?"

"You'll think of something Ken. I have to say, I'm getting quite jealous of Craig with all the attention you're giving him. You even went as far as to kiss him!" He smiled into my hair.

"N-not on the lips though!" I exclaimed. Before I could have said more, Karen came in the room, looking at us cuddling. My brother and I guiltily pushed away from each other so hard that we slammed ourselves on to the floor._ Ouch._

"...You guys do know ya'll didn't have to that, right?" Kare giggled. "One: It's just me. Two: I know you two don't date anymore, so snuggle all you want!"

I saw a flash in her lavender eyes, which caused me to recall the last time I read her diary. I know Karen secretly craves to give us comfort, since Kevin and I are so close. She feels left out and all she could do is watch. How could I not tell that she felt this way? How many times have Kevin and I held our sister like we do each other? I sat on the bed and motioned her to sit on my lap. Kare appeared confused and hesitant at first, then came and settled between my legs. My back pressed against the wall, I wrapped my legs and arms around her from behind. I kissed the top of her head, she exhaled gratifyingly. Kevin, being the smart big brother, caught on and sat next to me, he ruffled her hair. I gazed down to see her face tainted pink from the abrupt tender loving she was receiving.

"So, how's flirting with Madeleine been going?" I asked, reminiscing _her_ steps into confessing to the curly headed girl.

"It's going good. I did everything you guys taught me." She chirped.

"How did she react to your flirts?" Kev questioned, pinching her cheek affectionately.

"Oww quit it! Mads really didn't seem to mind me touching or talking to her in that way. Although she acted way too normal. I think she silently rejected my attempts into wooing her." She sighed disappointingly. "Mad's already going with Brad to the dance. Thanks for the help guys, but I'm too late."

"Noway!" My brother and I boomed with force. The shaven haired teen went on. "When is this dance?"

"This Friday night. I told Mad that I'll just stay home since I don't like big parties. I mean it, it's ok, there's no use."

"Don't give up Kare, please." I boosted. "It's on Friday, so we still have enough time. I'll speak to Craig about this, don't worry." She was quiet for a moment.

"Fine." I smiled and gave her a noogie.

"Oh yea! Before I leave, my associate told me that our parents said.." I revealed to them the information I had gotten about Mom and Dad. When I was done, we had a good silent tearing moment.

"They love us..." Kevin whimpered happily. "If only they could show us that."

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

The brunette arrived into their room, seeing the raven reading a black book intently. Craig's bandaged head snapped up and he speedily hidden the item under the covers. Kenny raised an eyebrow in curiosity, however the Tucker gave him the bird.

"Hey, I was just informed that Madeleine is going to the dance with, _Brad._" Kenny spatted the boy's name with disgust. "Karen is feeling doubtful but Kevin and I encouraged her to keep trying. The problem still is, that your sister doesn't seem to realize my sister's emotions."

"A-and what t-the hell do y-you want me to do about it?" Craig demanded carelessly, stuttering for some reason. The hazel eyed teen drowned in himself for a second, hearing the other boy curse so hotly. "Maybe LM g-giving up o-on her is g-good, ever thought a-about that?"

"Never! She shouldn't give up on something that she wants so easily. Have you even spoke to Madeleine about Kare yet?" Craig blushed softly and averted his stormy eyes.

"No...I-I was kinda too busy w-with taking care of y-your dead body while y-you were away.." Kenny's eyes widen, _he does have concern for me_, he thought. _How adorable, he doesn't want me to know!_

"Could you talk to her now? Karen's in Kevin's room so Madeleine should be alone." The raven groaned and stood up.

"Sure, b-but after I d-do so, quit b-bugging me about this!"

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

How did that sneaky bastard talk me into having an conversation with my little sister about her love life? I'm having my own problem with mines! Those sly McCormicks making me do things I wouldn't do. I can't believe I've told Kenny that I took care of him while he was dead. Shit, he loves me. Why couldn't I stop thinking about that when he came into the room? I was stuttering like an idiot. He even caught me reading my journal, which reminded me of what I've done. I knocked on Mad's door and entered without waiting for permission like always. I'm Craig Tucker, I don't need your damn consent.

My sister's room is probably not what the average 15 year old girl's room would be. Her walls are cloaked with posters of UFC fighters, X-Men, boyish anime, all the things a male would enjoy(except of course, naked females). The only thing that proved she was a girl, is the many many stuffed animals that cover the bottom bunk. Though she practices all her fighting moves on them. I glanced around and found Mad on the floor playing Rainbow Six. I uncomfortably crept over to her and sat down. Again, I don't know how many times I'll need to say this, _I'm not the exact person you'd think of if you want to have a deep conversation.__ Let alone talk about your love problems._

"Why are you here, what do you want?" Mads asked 'sweetly'.

"I just want to spend my useful time with my favorite sister in the whole world, what's wrong with that?" I told her just as sweetly. She punched my uninjured arm without looking away from the T.V screen. Holding my urge to yank the curls out of her head, I simply flipped her off. She giggled. Crap, how am I suppose to start this?

"Uhm...you and LM are great friends..how do you feel for her?" I began stupidly. Mads stayed quiet for a long period of time, shooting up people. Shit, what if I asked the wrong thing? Perhaps I said too much? She paused the game.

"I know what this is about now. I know that Karen has a crush on me, she made that quite clear when she flirted with me for the past few days. I know how I feel for her back, and I won't ignore how I'm feeling. Although, I want Karen to confess to me herself. I want to be sure she's not ashamed of liking me that way." I blinked.

"Whoa, wait. You're saying you like Karen back?"

"I'm not saying anything. If you really want something you're going to have to wait for it, or get it yourself. I choose to wait for it. In your case, you're going to have to get what you want Craig."

"W-what do you m-mean?" I tensed, Mad sighed heavily.

"It's _obvious_ how your feelings for that boy has deepened. I've noticed the change over the last several days, how you took care of his corpse, how you look at him, how you talk to him, how I overheard you speak with Stripe, and how Kare told me what she saw in your eyes. You can't hide your feelings from me Craig."

I was quite angry that she eavesdrops on my conversations with Stripe. In fact, I'm enraged. But what she said was completely true. No matter how irritating she could be, she is my sister. So I confessed everything I was truly feeling, with my head down,

"I am falling for him. I don't know why, but I am. He makes me happy, sad, furious, pathetic, and remorseful. I still love him for it. I admire him, he gives my life a little shine every time he smiles at me, or laugh. When he flirts with me my heart pounds so hard, my face heats up. When he kissed me for the first 2 times, my skin was on fire and I wanted more, even though he didn't touch my lips. When he told me he loves me, I cried a lot. I don't want him to love me, I don't want to love him or anyone else. I'm so confused right now, I keep thinking of her. I keep remembering what I did to her. I keep remembering how I felt with her. I don't know what to do about how I feel for him. A part of me wants to accept it, the other part is afraid of the consequences." I had my face in both hands, sobbing. I felt Mad's arms wrap around my shoulders.

"What you have done back then was cruel and wrong, I'll say that. However forever living in the sin is not the path to take..." She told me pitifully.

"But what if the same thing happens?" I bawled. "I don't want to hurt someone I love again."

"I can't be sure if you'll do it again. Though Kenny would just come back. The decision rests with you on what to do. Just do the right thing, please. I hate seeing you like this again."

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

As soon as I was sure Craig was gone, I swiped Stripe out of her cage and squeeze the air out of her.

"EEEK YOU'RE SO CUUTEE!" I squealed. "AWWW! YES YOU ARE A CHUBBY LITTLE PIG, YES YOU ARE!" The guinea pig squeaked so adorably. I rubbed my face lovingly against her soft fluffy body. SHE'S SOO SOFT! I squeezed her more, SHE'S SOO FAT!

"AWW, You're just the cutest, wutest, lutest, tutest thing ever aren't ya?" I gushed. "Look at your tiny cute paws! AWWW!" I think it's clear that I have an obsession with adorable things.

While snuggling the ever cute guinea pig, my eyes caught the black book I had seen Craig hide. I reluctantly put Stripe back down and held the book, it was actually a journal. With a red smiley face that had X's for eyes. My breathing hitched, this must be a diary for Craig! All of his dirty little secrets must be within these pages, I wanna read them. Ok, now I'm becoming like Clyde. I have went through Karen's diary, but that was different. This is _Craig's_ journal. Wait, yea, this is _CRAIG'S._ How many chances will I get to go through his privacy? I had my hand on the cover when I heard,

_"See him numb! See him Crushed! Rip them out, take them..."_

The sudden noise caused me to half scream and throw the journal in another direction. It was just my phone ringing, I thought someone had caught me! I picked up the cell from the bed and answered.

"YOU ALMOST GAVE ME AN HEART ATTACK!" I greeted politely. Stan's voice came into my ear.

_"Oops, I'm sorry Ken. Didn't mean to-hey! move it lard ass! M-"_ My friends voice got cut off, a new voice came on.

_"Listen here Kenny, you better get your tiny redneck ass over mah house in 5 or ya not gonna have an arm anymore!" _Cartman boomed, then hanged up. Well. It appears I'll be going to his house.

* * *

><p>When I arrived into Eric's bedroom, I got bomb rushed. Kyle and Stan dragged me by the arms and landed me in a chair.<p>

"No matter what job you got, you die either way! Even if you just bag food." The red head sighed. "Face it Kenny, you're just cursed."

"Haha, I told you guys that years ago. So, what I miss?" I laughed.

"Well, we had to convince your boss to let you keep the job, since you were absence for days." Cartman started. "I got to be football captain too."

"And I got to 2nd base with Wendy." The raven grinned mischievously. "You should feel how her breasts are so-"

"ANYWAYS," Kyle interrupted, "On to some other news-"

"No, I want to hear about Wendy's tits. I do love those boobs." I smiled, Kyle gave me a glare.

"If you say so hehe. Her breasts are _so_ round! And her nip-"

"ENOUGH!" The red head looked mortified and furious. Cartman roared with laughter.

"It's ok Stanley, you could tell him the story when fire crotch is gone. The wimp." He teased. "Can't even take hearing about a girl's rack. He'll be a virgin forever."

"Shut up you big tub of hatred!" Kyle steamed, blushing. "Like I said, ANYWAYS, my little brother entered this skating tournament. I hope he does good." I perked up.

"You mean Ike worked up the skills to be in a match? I can't wait to see his moves."

"I know right, he needs a new skate board though. He practiced so hard the wheels fell off." Stan snickered.

"Now that we kindly told you what happened with us, what the _fuck_ happened to you, Kevin, and Craig?" Cartman inquired. "Those two look like they fought a bear."

"It's a long story, so I'll break it down to you. Basically this happened: Craig and I went out. We find my brother beating some dude. I run and help Kevin. Soon everyone of us is fighting someone. I die. The end." I smiled, they all gave me blank expressions, the 'I'm not kidding' expression. Getting in my face, my friends said,

"I know more happened that night." Kyle declared.

"You better tell us." Cartman threaten.

"Or else." Stan glared.

Damn, can't keep anything from these guys. I sighed and informed them about the other details that occurred. Like Craig telling me about his problem, my parents loving us, how Craig tried to help me when that guy was hurting my legs, how he was crying over me, how I jumped in front of the bullets, how I confessed I loved him and kissed him, how I went to heaven, and how I kissed him again. Kyle gawked, Stan looked thoughtful, and Cartman was grinning.

"Finally, you're getting a back bone!" He praised. "We're so proud of you!"

"Hehe, yea. However Kevin gave me step 6: Get Craig to Confess and Date me. How will I make him accept his feelings for me?" I groaned exasperated, not liking this step one bit. Even though I long to know what event took place in 7th grade.

"We'll give you some tips. But first, I'm starving." Stan announced heading towards the door. "I'm gonna grab some snacks."

"Wait for me, you don't know what I like." Cartman left with him. Kyle glanced at me timidly.

"I-I told Stan..Kenny." My attention jerked to him so fast.

"You did?" He nodded.

"I confessed to him 2 days after your millionth death. He looked uneasy and shocked. Although he was ok with it, our friendship isn't harmed." Kyle smiled with relief. "Stan actually sometimes jokes about me liking him. He tells Wendy that she better be careful, he has _options._"

"That's so like him, fool." I chuckled.

"Mhm. Thanks Kenny, you made me take that chance. Hopefully Craig would take that risk with you." The Jew said gratefully. I shook my head.

"No, you did it on your own, don't thank me. I'm so proud of you. So, now that you've been fully rejected, has your boy crush moved on to Cartman?"

"Pfft, never!" He scrunched his nose up indignantly . "I wouldn't go so low to like that piece of shit, trust me on that one. Even though Cartman is much nicer now. I could like _you_ for all that's worth."

"Yea, very funny." We laughed.

"I'm starting to think I like Tweek." I double take.

"W...W-what? I'm sorry I didn't think I heard right." I flabbergasted.

"I think I like Tweek." He repeated giggling. I thought for a moment.

"If you and him have kids, they'll be Twitchy Ginger Jersey Jew babies!" I joked, he punched me.

"Seriously, Fat ass's influences is effecting you in a horrible way. I know it's weird for me to like him, but don't you find the way he spasms is attractive? Like 3 days ago at school, his head snapped in a grotesque way and snapped right back. It was hot." I stared.

"...You...you have a strange taste in people..."

"Shut up! You're the one who is in love with a degenerate who's best friend is a guinea pig!" We went on insulting each other's crushes until Stan and Eric came in, glancing at us baffled.

* * *

><p><strong>Wow, what do you even call the couple Kyle x Tweek<strong>**?** **Twyle? Kyeek?**_ REVIEW IF YOU WANT A CUPCAKE!_ _(Note:_ _I_ _have no cupcake to give you)_


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Yayz I published it!  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 13: An Old Dream and the Perfect Gift<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

_Slashing the butcher knife into the flesh made him felt so good. The blood that splattered across his face motivated him to cause more to burst out. The boy had a deranged satisfying smile as he touched the victim's pale cheeks. They were in a dark, locked, place._

"_L-Let me go, y-you're hurting m-me!" The girl yelled as the unsettled boy leaned down and kissed her lips passionately for the last time. She struggled from the bounds that kept her from running away.  
><em>

"_Why did you have to go and ruin our relationship?" He asked while slicing her ear, she screamed. "I loved you so, so much. But you just _had_ to ruin it, why? You think_ you're_ in pain? Honey, you can't stand the hurt you had put me in._"

"_HELP! PLEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME!" The girl begged uselessly, no one could save her. She was tied to the wall, hanging. The boy, tired of all her screaming and yammering, penetrated her scalp and forehead. Cutting in all directions, raining blood over her indigo hair and face. The girl screeched with all her might at the suffering torture.  
><em>

"_You still won't shut up, I'm sick of your mouth. I'm sick of that laugh you give him. I'm sick of watching you be happy with someone else, while I'm still lonely!" _

_The boy then stood back, slicing the knife on her neck. When that wasn't enough, he picked out the heaviest book he could get, and numerously slammed the item on her neck. Soon, he heard a crack. The boy smirked insanely. However he wasn't done, oh not yet. Even though he was sure that the girl was dead, he wanted more. The boy lifted up her shirt, piercing the knife into and across her stomach. Attempting to get as much organs and gore coming out as possible. It's clear to say that the boy was messed up in the head at this point. He didn't know what he was actually doing, it just felt good. It felt right. The boy wanted revenge and he got what he 'deserved'. To him, the girl's sin was bad enough that her punishment should be a gruel death. To him, this girl made love and death seem much alike. To him, this girl ruined his smile and laughs. To him, this girl had taught him that you won't smile forever, so why do it now? To him, this girl could go into hell for all he cared. To him, life is a big bucket of shit that throws crap at you every single time you think that everything will be 'alright'. To him, if you put him in such pain you deserve to die in the most gruesome way by the will of his hands. To him, this girl taught him that love is a path full of grim that no one should take. The boy looked emotionless into the girl's face, her mouth opened, eyes dull._

"_This is all your fault…" He spoke softly, slicing the weapon again. He glanced to his left and saw the other already dead victim. Who's head laid detached on the table behind him. Both of these fiends had not right to live in his view.  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

I shot up abruptly in bed, waking from the horrible nightmare, or memory. I panted and sweated, glancing frantically around the attic. My heart thudded as I saw Kenny was still asleep. Something came over me and I crept over to peer at his face. His appearance even reminds me of her, he looks so peaceful. The dream was part of the scene of my greatest mistake. How could I love someone after a incident like that? Kenny wouldn't dare to have any affections for me if he knew what I've done, maybe that's it. Maybe I could just expose my past to him, then he'll reject me. But do I want him to reject me? I really don't know what I want. I looked to Stripe.

"Ignoring my feelings is becoming impossible." She whistled. "I know, I know, remember what Mads told me. The decision rests with me..." I glanced back at the brunette and gently brushed his hair. This is the first time I ever felt it, or even touched him softly. I want to touch more of him and him to touch me. I want to push him away and for him to push me away. Shit. I'm scared as hell, I can't keep going on like this.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Monday Morning)<strong>

Mmmm, sausage biscuits are SO delicious! Everyone on Earth should-no, even bigger. Everyone on Earth, _and_ on other planets should have at least one bite of this savory meal. You'll be in Heaven once you've eaten it. And trust me, I've been to Heaven before, literally. The eggs and cheese makes the breakfast better, if that's possible. Madeleine stepped sluggishly into the kitchen, making her Coco Puffs.

"Good morning Madeleine." I greeted. "I have to ask, why are you constructing a bowl of cold milk and hard corn, when you could have a warm tasty plate of sausage biscuits?"

"Morning, and because not everyone loves that the way you do Kenneth." She yawned.

"Why'd you call me by my full name? And you don't like sausage biscuits? You aren't human! Though I can't speak..."

"Because you call me by mines." Madeleine answered pointedly. "Anyways, I'm glad that our brothers are getting their bandages removed today." She sat next to me and started eating.

"Oh, so they them get taken off today? That's why Craig's still sleeping." I just noticed that my sister is not with her. "Where's Karen?"

"In a coma. I tell you, that girl can snore through a parade. I put the alarm clock _right_ next to her ear and she just dozes." Madeleine giggled. "It's like a 3 hour process to wake her up."

"I know what you mean. At our old house, Kevin and I had poured a cup of water on her." I chuckled at the memory of seeing Kare's angry wet face.

"Mhm. Ah before you do me like Craig did, Yes I know your little sister likes me." She told me bluntly. Well, that was just what I was about to do. "I know how I feel for her back, and I won' t ignore it. But I want Karen to tell me how she feels, to prove herself." I nodded understanding. She went on,

"Hopefully my brother will accept his emotions for you soon, it's not fair for him to make you wait like this." I stared shocked at her for a moment, she knows about our situation? "Duh, don't look at me like that. I am his _sister_."

"I guess you're right. Though I wouldn't mind waiting for Craig, whatever happened to him in the past, he's fighting it. I just have to be patient for him." I told her adoringly. I'll do anything for him, as long as he'll one day accept me as a lover.

"You know, I could actually tell you what happened-"

"TELL ME!" I practically jumped out of my seat.

"Whoa, didn't you say that you'd wait for him patiently?" She snorted. "If you let me finish, I was going to say 'but I won't tell you because that's for Craig to confess'."

"...Damn it." I slumped my head on the table in defeat.

"Don't worry, he'll come around. If he doesn't, I'll beat him up for you." Madeleine promised.

"You don't know how many people threaten to hurt him for me, it's kinda funny." I told her, remembering the threats Cartman, Stan, and Kevin made.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

I'm in the passenger seat, with Kevin driving to the hospital. He's running this broken down pick up truck, I don't trust it. It jerks and jumps every time we hit the tiniest bump. The auto-mobile is making this strange noise that's warning me that it'll explode. The driver is humming a tune, acting like he can't fucking see these dangerous signs.

"Uhm, Kevin?" I started off. "I don't mean to be rude but, is this rickety-dink car is safe? Are you even a good driver?"

"You mean old Black Shadow? Ah, she's the best dang truck ever driven! Yes, I am a good driver, ask Kenny." He chirped proudly. I still don't trust it, or _him._

I've realized that I had a personal chat at least once with each McCormick. Even the punk ass parents. All for, except Kevin. Sure we had that brotherly moment back at the fight where Kenny got last killed. Though we didn't talk. Okay, time to pry some information from him.

"So, how do you do in school?" I asked. The shaven haired teen glanced at me.

"I'm doing pretty good. I might not look it, but I'm in math honors." He answered happily.

"Fuck what is it with you McCormicks being great in math! The subject is shitting useless." I groaned. "What's your favorite food?"

"Pot pies. Speaking of food, you got my little brother hooked on those little breakfast sandwiches." Kevin chuckled. I groaned inwardly, how come every conversation I have nowadays leads to that brunette?

"I swear, if we start talking about Kenny, I'LL SCREAM." I advised. The older teen laughed.

"Hey, I got an idea. Let's talk about Kenny." I gave him a sharp glare. "I know there's _something_ you wanna know about him."

Wait, yes. Yes there is a lot of things I want to know about him. Fuck the McCormicks and there sneaky persuasive ways! I reluctantly asked Kevin a question I've been wondering about.

"H-How was it l-like dating Kenny...?" I inquired, trying to hide my big interest. Perhaps the detail he'll give would offer me an idea of what it will be like if I accept him. Kevin glanced me amused and sadly.

"Ah, I see what you're asking. Well, being with him, to me, is pure happiness. During the time dated, he gave me comfort with that huge smile he brings to my life. Ken would, and still is, over protective of me when I'd go out on my job. He'd tease me by saying I give other people more attention than him." He smiled.

"It seemed like a fantastic relationship." I commented softly.

"Thanks, it was. But that's not it. If you remembered, Kenny was very depressed around that time, before you and him got close. Every time he died, he'd cry for days, slowly ridiculing and putting himself down. Every death separated him from everyone else. He felt no one would love him for what he truly is."

"I recall that night he told me all this..." I stated, he nodded.

"The way Ken would act, hiding his hair and eyes, being silent since he told _himself_ that no one likes his voice, which is music to my ears. My brother would go into mode several times a day. By the way, 'mode' is when he hyperventilates and goes into some kind of different state. All of this affected everyone slowly. I started worrying, which caused Karen to not eat since both of her brothers were messed up. Mom and dad did drugs more, since all of their children were troubled.

"I wanted to give Kenny the love he thought would never come to him." I caught his eyes water, but he held it back strongly. "I wanted to make him happy, to make him know that he's not ugly, not deformed, not rejected. Every time I laid my lips on him, I tried injecting my love into him. However it wasn't enough, I've failed him. Kenny would be ok for a while, though not for long. He'll assure that he needs me, but he doesn't, not in that way. I realized that the first time he went missing at your house. I still love him very much, I'm sure Kenny feels the same way with me. I just don't feel that I gave him what he desired, I felt I wasn't enough for him. My brother deserves more than me, that's where you come in."

"..M-me?" I stuttered, he nodded again.

"Karen and I noticed how Kenny changed being with you. He puts on a real smile more, he's much braver now. He even shows his real identity, so I thank you. His family and friends couldn't help him go through these issues, and you did it without realizing it. I mean, yea, we did kinda helped him, just not much. Kenny is searching for someone to love and love him, for some insane reason, he chose you. I think everyone in the house can see that you love my brother too, not including the parents. Don't lie, we know you do. I've heard you're just not accepting that you-"

"Why is everybody talking about my love life?" I groaned.

"Because you hide it poorly." He chuckled. "Anyways, that's pretty much it. Please Craig, give Kenny the love that I couldn't award him. Please make him happy for me."

"I-I'm trying to decide on what to do about my feelings and what happened in the past. It's too difficult...I don't even know why I'm liking the dude when I hated him. What do you find attractive about him?"

"Hmm, you mean his looks? Oh, let me tell you. He has the most gorgeous hazel eyes you've seen. They're so different and clear like mirrors. Ken's lips are so soft, you've felt them and know what I mean." Kevin winked.

"S-Shut up!" I exclaimed blushing furiously.

"Hehe. I could tell you how he is in bed? Well his hands are just _amazing_. They touch everywhere, you can't stop them. His tongue is great too. Wait till you feel how he licks-"

"I said SHUT UP!" I growled, heart beating quickly from the detail he gave. Shit, I'm wandering about liking him or not, and Kevin's putting this into my head!

"Pfft, Kenny's right. You are cute." I was mortified at that comment as the teen reached over and ruffled my hair. "C'mon, you can't tell me that you've never thought about having sex with my brother."

"I haven't! And I don't want to. How did the conversation turn into this anyway?" I inquired curiously.

"Because I made it change, I have that power. So, you mean when he flirts and touches you, you don't get excited 'down there'?" He asked shocked. My mind went back to when we searching for Kevin, and I had my shirt off. The brunette's hands were rubbing against me. I was excited, but not sexually excited. Wait now that I'm starting to think about it...SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT!

"HAHAHA!" Kevin roared laughing, seeing me bang my head against the dash board. "Looks like somebody got the hots for Kenny_._"

"...I...I hope you choke on a popsicle ..." I growled jokingly.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

"The Food Network brainwashes all of your heads, trust me on this guys." Cartman announced to us seriously, we were walking to school.

"That's gotta be the most stupidest thing you've ever said Cartman. Everyone knows that it's the Disney channel that brainwashes people." Stan disagreed.

"Insane! Food Network gets you to think that you could actually cook, when you fucking can't!" The two went on quarreling. Kyle and I watched them yelling, it was quite amusing.

"You know, if anything I agree with Stan. Disney channel is kinda weird.." The red head commented.

"Please, both of the channels alters our minds." I smirked. A memory flew back into my mind from Sunday. Grabbing the Ky's arm, I dragged him back a bit from the quibbling teens.

"So, you're attracted to twitchy coffee addicted boys, uh?" I snickered, trying to hold back my growing laughter.

"Will we have to go through this situation again?" Kyle warned grinning. "Tweek is much more than that."

"Oh really? Well why don't you tell him this instead of me? Tweekers isn't all that threatening you know." I asked. "It's an easy mission to tell him you like him."

"Yea, I'm not afraid to tell him how I feel. It's just his gang, Clyde, Token, and Craig. If me and him start dating, that means I might have to hang with _them_ sometimes." The Jew shivered. Before I could mention that if Craig and I start dating he'll probably be with them anyways, we noticed that the arguing in the background had ceased. Stan and Cartman was looking at us with raised eyebrows. They must have overheard our conversation.

"Kyle...you...with Tweek? PFFT!" Eric snorted, the raven next to him laughed guiltily in his hands.

"You two are nosy as hell!" Kyle blushed furiously.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Attic)<strong>

"Isn't this just peachy Stripe? I get to miss school for 2 days since my body isn't 'prepared' to move around a lot in a busy environment" My guinea pig whistled a concern.

"You're right, I'll be missing a lot of homework. Remind me later to ask Clyde or Token for it, you know Tweek can't give me it." I chucked. The last time the boy promised me my work, he didn't give it because the underwear gnomes took it and he was terrified to get it back.

"I'm gonna go head to the shower now, can't wait to finally bathe."

The doctors had advised me not to wash up until at least 1 hour after the bandages were removed. Leaving the attic, I headed down to the bathroom and turned on the hot water. I torn off my clothing and stepped into the shower. I sighed in contentment. Unfortunately my mind went back to the conversation I had with Kevin. I had started remembering what he had told me about Kenny's tongue and hands, I found myself moving my fingers _downward_. Shit shit shit shit! But it feels so good, I could imagine the brunette nibbling my skin, his hands grabbing me. I let out a pleasurable moan, panting in the steam of the shower. Where is this new feeling come from? Kevin made me think of this, I'm SOO going to kill the crap out of him. But first, back this marvelous sensation.I whimpered as I grew harder, stroking faster. Finally, I released and slumped fetal position in the tub, shower still running.

"Fuck, now I'm _lusting_ after him," I groaned. "Just like I did with her. This is not good." It sure felt good.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

"Big fat meanie, you should be at work instead of wasting your time walking me home!" My sister huffed. "I could do this by myself, I'm not little no more."

"It's only half way." I pointed out. "Besides my boss is okay with it. I want to make sure you're safe, since Madeleine is at tutoring and Craig's not here." I heard Kare sigh in frustration at the mention of her crush's name. Should I tell her the information I have received this morning, Madeleine didn't say I couldn't. But she didn't said I can. Eh, oh well.

"Madeleine told me that she knows you like her." My sister's face looked as if she'd seen God. "Yhup, she told me that she wants you to confess to her, that's all."

"Y-You gotta be kidding me!" Kare jumped up and down excitedly. "That m-means she likes me too?"

"...She didn't say actually. Oh but you better tell her now." I gave her a nuggie. "If you don't, I'll get Kevin on you!"

"Hehe ok, ok!"

* * *

><p>"Are you better now? I heard that you were sick for a few days." Christine asked me, while checking out the food. The job was getting much easier, I'm used to random people looking and talking to me now.<p>

"Yea, I just came down with a nasty flu." I lied trustingly. "What about you? What happened while I was gone?"

"Here's your change sir. Me? Oh, the usual. Came here and worked, though there was this lady who brought a whole jar of pennies and counted out $6.89 one, by, one! I swear I was going to punch that woman." She smirked, I laughed.

"Pfft, I'm glad I wasn't here for that. What the boss say about it?"

"NOTHING. Absolutely nothing, I was furious! Ah, I'm sure your girlfriend took care of you while you were ill, uh?"

"Oh, I don't have a girlfriend, but my...associate took care of me." I informed her. I wish Craig was my girlfriend, I think he'll look good in a skirt, hehe.

"You don't have a girlfriend? Then would you be interested in going on a date with me?" Christine smiled shyly, yet boldly at me. WHOA HOLD THE PHONE, DID I JUST GET ASKED OUT?

"U-u-uhm, WOW!" I exclaimed stupidly, bagging some oranges. She asked me out. What the fuck! Excuse my language but, shitballs! No one besides Kevin has asked me out before, except for the time I was a prostitute.

"Is..that a yes?" She looked at me hopefully, basing the answer by my reaction. I gave her an apologetic look.

"I'm sorry, I-I was just taken aback. See, I don't get asked out a lot. I can't go out with you because, I have someone else in mind." Craig. My wonderful Craig. Christine didn't seem defended or sad, but a weird knowing appearance.

"I understand how you must feel for this person, good luck." I smiled.

"Thank you." Just then, my friends came into view at the entrance. "Looks like my shift is over, cya Christ."

"Byes!"

* * *

><p>"For. The. Last. Time! The Food Network is anything but an evil channel!" Stan exasperated, pinching his nose. The two were still going at it. Kyle and I attempted to stop this nonsense, though again, it's just too fun watching.<p>

"It has became obvious to me that you do not comprehend what I am stating. Food Network corrupts your mind by baking a frozen turkey under 30 minutes and having cupcake wars! What the hell do you call all that?" Cartman insisted.

"You know, I actually like that show Cupcake Wars. What happens to the loser's cupcakes? Do they throw them away?" Kyle asked thoughtfully, that is a great question.

"Not to be rude, but screw the cupcakes for a minute Ky. I'm trying to convince this difficult child that Disney Channel is much more brainwashing." The raven pleaded.

While the redhead pouted about being put to the side, my eye caught an little store that sells gifts. Without a word, I made a bee line for it and entered. Everywhere it had presents for all occasions; birthdays, weddings, parties, and especially get wells. I strolled into that section and looked around curiously. My friends came seconds later.

"What are you doing in here?" Stan inquired. Looking sheepishly at them, I answered.

"Well...I wish to get Kevin and Craig something, their getting the bandages removed today-they should be home by now. I know what to get Kev, but could ya'll help me find something for Craig?" My brother is an easy person to pick a gift out for, however Craig is a different story.

"Aww, our little Kenny wants to buy a get well present for his crush! Isn't that just the most endearing thing you've ever heard of?" Cartman poked.

"You're right, I'm warmed at the heart." Stan snickered.

"Mhm, I'm with you there. Like the gift could be their 1 week anniversary of being associates ." Kyle teased, I blushed and my eyebrow twitched.

"C-can you guys just help me? I want to show my a-affection for him more. What do you think he'll like? Some scented candles?" All 3 of them lost their humor and gave me blank looks.

"Do you actually think _Craig_ would light candles?" Eric scoffed.

"You may not know him well, but seriously?" Stan snorted.

"That's the lamest gift for a teenage boy anyway! _I_ don't even like it." Kyle declared. My group crossed their arms in disappointment, shaking their heads.

"If I pick out such idiotic gifts, then help me!" I started searching for Kevin's present first. It was quick and simple, a nice size basket of plastic wrapped sugar cookies, his favorite.

"Hey, would he like this?" Stan displayed to me a bouquet of roses. "It shows that you love him."

"...The hell, and giving him candles was an stupid idea? Can you even imagine Craig sniffing the flowers and putting them in a vase of water?" I questioned surprised, all of us laughed at the image.

"He has a point. Oh how about some chocolates?" Cartman offered. "They're sweet and more realistic."

"Hmm it's a good choice, but the candy won't last long, like my love for him." I giggled.

"How about this, it'll last and it's elegant." Kyle suggested, pointing to a glass figurine of a spider. "It's creepy, mysterious, and cold like him."

"What is _Craig_ gonna do with that Ky?" Stan flabbergasted. "That's worse than flowers, he'll break that!" We chuckled again and went back to searching.

"You don't think he'd like balloons?" I tried, eying them floating on the ceiling.

"He'd pop them." They said in unison.

"Ah, how about a decorative box?" Cartman asked, we stared at him. "What! he can't break it."

"He'll look at me like I'm dumb Eric." I grinned.

"Kenny, think, just think. For all the time you known Craig, what's one thing you know he'll love and won't reject? Think REAL hard on this Kenny." Kyle advised. I thought REAL hard, as my redhead put it, I soon got my answer.

"I know what to give him, he can't resist this gift!" I excitedly started looking through the shelves once more. When I found the perfect item, I held it proudly giggling. My friends stared at me confused.

"Trust me, he'll love it." I assured.

* * *

><p><strong>Hehe, I'm not sure why I added that part about Craig in the shower :X<br>**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Woot woot chapter 14!  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 14: First 'Date' and China Ellis<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV* (Still Monday)<br>**

Craig was relaxing on his bed when his roommate walked in, grinning and obviously hiding something behind his back. The silver eyed boy sat up and cocked his head questioningly, not liking to have anything hidden from him.

"What do you have?" He demanded, squinting his orbs. Kenny stepped closer, bringing a bag from his backside. The brunette reached in the package and shyly held out the present. The raven just stared at it. In front of him was a soft plushie stuffed guinea pig, big enough to fit both of his hands. The fur was black and white, with brown paws, the eyes were gleaming green. A deeper green ribbon tied around it's neck to finish it off. Craig grabbed the toy, still gazing and face unreadable.

"I-I know it's probably too late to g-give you a get well gift," The McCormick fiddled with his fingers, "But here you go! I just wanted to get you something for what happened."_ Oh no, he doesn't like it! Look at how he's just staring at it!,_ He thought. Surprisingly and alarmingly, Craig smiled.

"Thank you, how did you know I love guinea pigs?" _Shit he's too sweet, too kind! However this toy is so adorable.._The raven thought hopelessly and frantically, still trying to ignore his emotions.

"Eh, it was a guess." Kenny hesitantly and abruptly sat down next to the raven, peering into his face and brushing away the long bang. _Fuck the bastard's too close and he's touching me! I can't move, my heart is beating too quickly, _The Tucker stimulated, biting his lip.

"I'm so sorry, I can't believe I put in you in such danger." The brunette apologized, observing the healing marks on his crush's face. He noted that above the right eyebrow it had a small stitching. The 4 gashes(2 on either side) on his cheeks seemed to shrunk a bit and were glued or stitched together. _Why did he had to get hurt in my mess? Why does someone I love always get punished from being with me?_

"It's f-fine. Like I-I said, you couldn't s-stop me from going with y-you. You shouldn't say sorry, you s-saved my life. If a-anything I should be thanking y-you.." Craig muttered, averting his eyes. _I'm just glad that you're alive, _the raven mused secretly and humiliating from having such thoughts.

"But still, you have permanent scars while I die and come back healthy, it's not fair. How's your skull, did the tiny crack heal properly?" The hazel orb boy worried, caressing the teen's head gently.

"Mhm, t-though I c-can't wash m-my hair for about a-another 3 days." Tucker stuttered, cheeks fainting a light pink from the delicate fondle. "I b-barely feel any pain, didn't I tell y-you to q-quit touching me?"_ The more he lays his hands on me, the harder it gets for me to ignore my feelings!_

"Sorry I forgot." Kenny giggled, removing his hand. "May you show me your other injuries?" Craig lifted his long sleeved of his slightly muscled left arm, there was a stitched scar that ran horizontal. After the raven saw the brunette's concern face, he pulled the sleeve back down. _I wonder if I should show him the marks on my back...no he'll just feel more bad, he probably forgot about that injury anyways, _He pondered. Unfortunately, the McCormick remembered what he was told.

"What about the stab marks to your back?" He asked. _That's so nice, he doesn't want to show me all of his scars because he doesn't want me to worry too much,_ Kenny gushed silently, reading Craig's stormy eyes. The Tucker huffed and nodded reluctantly. Ken got up and went behind him, the teen lifted his shirt a bit. The brunette bit his tongue, keeping him from moaning in grief. Craig's lean back had a long gash that went diagonally from his right shoulder blade to his lower left section. He couldn't help but gingerly touch the scar, the raven stiffen at the airy strokes of Kenny's fingertips along his bare skin.

"Q-quit fucking t-touching me!" Craig pulled his shirt back down, the brunette got up and sat in front of him again, gazing in the other teen's silver eyes.

"...Do you really hate it when I touch or kiss you? Is it really that awful?"

"...Y-Yes, in a w-way.." The raven answered unsure. _Why is he asking me such a thing?__ I mean, I don't exactly hate it when he feels me, but again, I haven't made an decision on what to do yet._

The Tucker fidgeted uncomfortably under the McCormick's deep stare. Kenny suddenly leaned forward, just stopping centimeters before Craig's lips. The raven sucked in his breath from the unexpected proximity, his heart pounded hard. The brunette snaked his arms around the shocked boy's neck.

"I love you, a lot. Please don't be afraid of that." Ken whispered depressingly and determinedly. "I'll wait for you for as long as it takes, one day you will accept me, and I'll be right here for you. I love being with you, I love cuddling you, I love kissing you, and I love looking at you. I love _you_ Craig Tucker, I can't express that enough.." He raised his head to kiss the raven's eyebrow softly. The Tucker blushed furiously from the words and shoved Kenny off.

"D-don't say t-that to me." The raven mumbled, turning away. "I d-don't want y-you to love me. You d-don't know how my c-chest tightens every time you say t-things like that." The McCormick studied his crush's stormy distressed orbs. _Please Craig, tell me why you can't feel the same way..._Kenny begged quietly, then forced a giggled, hiding his sadness like usual.

"You're so cute, you know that? Well, I'm going to give Kevin his present." He picked up the bag and headed to the door, then at last thought he said,

"Remember when I told you what to do about your problem? 'Just listen to your heart.' So, please, listen to your heart Craig."

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I found my favorite brother lounged on the couch in the living room. He perked up when I appeared in front of him, I smiled.

"Guueess whaaaat I gooot?" I sung, waving the bag in his face.

"Hmm," Kevin sniffed in a humorous manner. "I smell...Sugar Cookies! Oh you little sly dog you, give it here!" I laughed as he reached up to snatch the package, he has a thing for these cookies.

"Ah ah, what do you say to your little bro for buying you a late get well gift?" I teased. He rubbed his chin in deep thought.

"Uhm, I say, 'if you don't fucking give me my damn mother fucking cookies I'll snap your leg?'" He smiled innocently. "Is _that_ what I say?"

"Hm, let me think about that, oh yea no!" The next thing I knew, I was being pulled down onto his lap, I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist and arms around his neck. The old position caused him and I to blush awkwardly. Kevin grinned sneakily and jerked the bag from my hands, tearing into the basket and gulping down 5 cookies already.

"Thanks Kenny, you didn't have to give me this." He said through chewing, I reached in and grabbed me one as well. "So, watcha get block face, I know you gave him something."

"Hehe is it that obvious? I got him a plushie toy guinea pig, ooh I should have shown you it before I handed it to him." I gushed. "It's soo cute, like him! Craig said he loved it."

"Pfft, you're making me more envious of him every time you say his name." Kevin shook his head chuckling. He brought his face to my cheek and licked off the crumbs slowly. Even though I knew this was just a normal gesture(for us anyways), my blush deepened and I buried my head in his chest. I felt his heart beating the same rate as mines, quickly.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't resist. Your face is right next to mines with crumbs all over it." My brother apologized embarrassed. "I'm just making this harder for you to get over me, am I?" I unwillingly nodded.

"Kyle told me, that I don't have to get over you, as long as I know that I can never date you again." I lifted my head up and smiled gratefully. "I can keep loving you like I always had." Kevin's eyes widen, then relaxed. He lowered his head on my chest.

"Really Ken, you say the darnest things."

"No, I mean it. I want to still love you, and Craig. It's better this way for me, I don't feel like I'm losing you while having affections for someone else."

"You'd never lose me, how many times will I have to tell you this?" He nuzzled my neck with his head. "You know, our brother relationship is _very_ abnormal."

"That's so true." I laughed. "How do regular brothers even act?"

"Hmm. First off, regular brothers don't sit in each other's lap like this, _and_ enjoy it." Kevin motioned to the way I was on him.

"Wait, who said I was enjoying this?" I demanded. He lifted his face and raised an eyebrow at me, I pouted. "Fine, I am. Regular brothers don't lick each other's cheeks and like it."

"Regular brothers don't say they love them in that way."

"Regular brothers never kiss each other."

"Regular brothers never slept with each other.'

"Regular brothers don't go on saying what regular brothers do." We laughed.

"Let's face it Ken, we've never been the 'everyday siblings'. I don't want to change that. "

"Pfft, me either. We've done too many things to try to change anyways. Speaking of siblings, how's Kare?"

"Ah, have you read her diary lately? It said she was soo close to confessing to Mad, but she wimped out. I swear, I'll hurt that girl."

"Haha, she only has 4 more days until the dance comes." A thought occurred to me that should have came a while ago. "Oh my god! How are you? How's the wounds healing? And oh my Jesus! Your leg got cut and I'm sitting on your lap, oh my damn-"

"Kenny! Calm down, I'm fine. They've given me pain medicine so I could walk easier. The stitches are nice and fit and my tooth will grow back. Everything's alright." I sighed relieved.

"That's-" I couldn't finish my sentence, as we saw our mom staring at us strangely and confused. Kevin and I looked from her, to our position of me sitting wrapped on his lap. It took us at least a good minute to realize the situation and remove our selves from each other.

"H-Hey mom..." The shaven head teen greeted nervously.

"Yea, h-hello." I stuttered. How long was she standing there!(?)

"...What were...uhm...well, never mind! Can you boys come with me into the guestroom? Your father and I would like to speak to you guys, and your sister." My brother and I glanced at each other, when was the last time they wanted a conversation with all 3 of us?

"Uh, ok."

* * *

><p>We walked into their room and saw Karen already sitting on the bed, we sat on either side of her. Mom closed the door, dad was the first to speak.<p>

"Kids, I'm sure you guys know your parents aren't experts on long speeches, so this'll be short. We want to say, we're sorry." I promise that you could hear a pen drop.

"We've given up on a lot of things in our lives, and it affected you all." Mom stated, clasping her hands. "We wasted all of our cash on drugs and beer, it's our fault that we lost our home, which wasn't even much."

"We put you through so much suffering, and we did nothing about it." Dad went on. "We are aware that you two, Kevin and Kenny, did drugs and drank with us, also prostituted yourselves. We aren't ashamed of that fact, we're not angry."

"You two did something that we could never do, get a job and get money for the family." Mom praised. "We're proud, also of you Karen. You were and still is strong during those times. We're just so, so sorry for our faults. But, it might not seem it, we do love you guys."

"Believe it. You three fill in our hearts at night when we dream. We know that we must be the most neglectful, pathetic, pitiful-"

"Oh just stop it!" Karen wailed, running up to dad and throwing her arms around him. "You two are the best parents I know! My brothers and I don't care about your mistakes, we don't care what bad things you've done! All we care about is if you love us, and you do. That's all that matters..."

Mom glanced from Kare to us, uncertain.

"Is...is that true?" She gasped. Kevin and I exchanged looks, I had to answer.

"Y-Yes mom. We thought that you must love the drugs and alcohol more than us." I fidgeted.

"We never really had that parental affection, you know?" Kevin finished, his green eyes watering. Mom came and embraced us.

"We promise you that we'll get a job and get a better house. Ms. and Mrs. Tucker are kind enough to help us with that." Dad informed, kissing the top of Karen's head.

"You guys can't keep living this way, so starting today, we're no longer going to hide things or do retarded mistakes." Mom told us. When she let go, my siblings and I started glancing at each other, talking in our minds. We silently made the decision to tell our secrets, Kare went first.

"M-mom, dad? We have something to say too." She went back and sat between Kevin and I again. "I'm bi-curious and has a crush on Mad." My sister grinned timidly.

"Kenny and I love each other and had sex before." Kevin confessed, gazing at them right in the eye, crap now it's my turn.

"I'm in love with Craig, and the times I go missing, I actually die." I avoided my eyes from them. It was silent for a long moment, a very uncomfortable, uneasy moment. Finally, dad recalled he had a voice.

"Ok, let me get t-this straight. Our daughter is bi-curious, that's fine. Our two sons had sex and dated, not so fine. And one of our sons dies and comes back, what the hell?"

"Stuart, language!" Mom scolded. "W-would you children, m-mind telling us a little m-more about this?"

We sighed in unison, knowing we're going to be here for awhile to tell the whole story. For the next hour, we explained how Karen gets the idea of being bi-curious from Kevin and I, we explained how my brother and I relationship started just as an act for money, then got deeper. We explained the times I die and how we don't know why I come back. We explained my situation with Craig, and it took another 20 minutes for them to believe all of this was true. We also told them the new things they probably didn't know about, for example, my new job bagging food or about the real reason why Kevin and Craig had gotten injured. It was nice, having a family chit chat like this, even if this is our first. After our talk, Kevin and I left the room, Karen stayed to get tips about picking up women from dad (never get tips from dad on _any_thing).

"I don't know about you, but I was scared shitless telling them all that." I shivered. "I'm so relieved that they're ok with it."

"Right, though I swear I head dad muttered something about 'redneck sons' when we told them how we used to date." Kevin chuckled. "Oh by the way, I won't be going to school for 2 days, and block face. The doctors advised that our body's aren't ready yet."

"Aw I see." I stated.

"Guess what, I have a plan for you to complete step 6." My brother whispered in my ear the mission and details, it was absolutely perfect.

"A-are you sure he'll like it though?" I questioned, Kev just put on a smug smirk.

"Puh-lease I'm always right."

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Tuesday Morning)<strong>

I woke up in bed to see Kenny on his side of attic, reading a book. I glanced at the clock and it was way past to being tardy for school.

"Dude, why the hell are you here? Why aren't you in school?" I ordered, not liking that my day of 6 hours not seeing the brunette has vanished.

"Since you took care of my body when I was dead, I'll take care of yours!" The brunette answered cheerfully. "Good morning. By the way, you held the guinea pig so adorably while you were sleeping."

That comment made me realized I was holding Cow in my arms, (I named the toy guinea pig Cow because it's black and white), I have to admit, he is soft and comfy. But wait, Kenny is going to take care of me all day? Oh hell no this is not good, I'm still recovering from yesterday of how he said he loves me for like the 3rd time! Not to mention what happened in the shower...and if he's staying here, what about his job?

"What are you going to do about work, you've missed enough days already when you were dead." I told him, yea that'll make him leave.

"When it's time, I'll go to Finney's Market, and come back. By then everyone else should be home from either work or school. Ah, and Kevin is at a friends house resting instead of here." My roommate informed.

"Well, I could take care of myself! I don't need you to help me, my wounds are healing just fine. I didn't need you all those other days while I was hurt." I retorted.

"Ok, then try turning in bed." He challenged. I attempted to twist and failed miserably. As soon as I tried moving my side, my back ached. "The bandages gave you some kind of support, though now it's gone, you have me."

"Grr, fine you could stay, you're wasting your time though."

"Yay!" Kenny cheered. "I'm not wasting my time, I get to spend most of my day _alone_ with you. It's practically a date!" He winked his hazel orbs, I blushed faintly.

"It's not a date." I groaned, getting up. "I'm going to go wash my face and-" He had halted me before I could leave.

"I'll wash your face for you." He offered.

"The f-fuck! I think I could clean myself up Kenny, move!"

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Kitchen)<strong>

The plan that Kevin had told me yesterday was to get a 'date' with Craig, since it's clear that I barely spend time with him during my schedule. Kev would be at his friends house so I'll have at least a good 5 or 6 hours with my love. Perhaps this will be enough for him to accept me. I'm in the kitchen, going to make him pancakes when he walked in.

"What are you doing?" He inquired, studying me taking out bowls and a frying pan.

"I'll make you breakfast!" I chirped, Craig gave me the 'once-over'.

"I don't trust your cooking, like I don't trust your brother's driving." The raven grunted, sitting down.

"Aww but you know that I'm in Home Ed so-"

"Still no." He interrupted, "I'll just have some cereal."

"Alright," I sighed, "You could have at least asked for sausage biscuits. Why do you people always pick cereal?" I reached up and got the Coco Puffs Madeleine was eating and made two bowls. I pulled up a seat and sat next to him, we ate.

"Where's your parents? The house seems really empty." The raven commented. I could tell Craig's uncomfortable from it just being us here.

"Ah, they're out looking for a job." Oh craps, what do you do on a first date? I have no idea of how to talk with this boy! And sitting here quiet with him all day is just a big waste. Luckily, he started the conversation, though shaky.

"Uhm, w-what do you do with your f-friends?" I blinked.

"Everything! Mostly dumb stuff though. Like one time, we fought over who'd be better in a bikini-_don't ask_-and Bebe and Butters were judges, it was hilarious! Kyle came in 1st, Stan and I tied, of course Cartman came last." I chuckled, unexpectedly Craig smirked amused.

"Trust me, my crew's much worse. I don't know if you remembered, but we had wandered why every time somebody got drunk, they'd forget everything that happened, that was our 8th grade science project. Somehow Token gotten us Aspen Edge and Tweek video taped us, since he was too afraid to drink. We've gotten an perfect A from our teacher and 2 months of being grounded." He laughed, I was in awe.

"I-I'm utterly I-impressed! Craig Tucker actually drank before, _wow._" I remarked, he grinned sheepishly. "What did you guys do while drunk, even better, where was I when ya'll did this?"

"Well, in the beginning of the tape, we had just started drinking. 45 minutes later, all of us were shirtless since it was 'hot', Token was on the floor knocked out, Clyde was puking in the bathroom, and I was flirting with the lamp. An hour later of more drinking, we were all singing Christmas songs for some reason. 10 minutes later we were crying about how much we love each other, then 2 minutes later we started yelling how much we hated each other. Finally, it ended up with us laying on one another on the couch asleep. During the whole video you'll hear Tweek freaking out in the background, without no one to calm him." I burst out laughing, he joined me.

"What about you? What swimsuits did ya'll wear?"

"Pfft, Cartman worn a light brown halter with pink flowers and a matching bikini bottom. I know it's a gross image, but the outfit itself was pretty. Stan worn a black and blue frilly triangle bikini top and thong that looked hot. Kyle had a red strapless with white polka dots and matching tight short shorts, plain sexy. I had a white spaghetti strap with black tiny butterflies scattered on it and a black bikini bottom with a white ribbon wrapped around it." I giggled.

"Damn, I wish I could have seen how stupid ya'll looked." Craig chuckled, I grabbed my cell on the table and went to the pictures, I shown him. He laughed at my friends poses and appearance, then looked away and blushed at mines, I smirked. "I look like a fine girl don't I?"

"J-just hush and finish eating your cereal.." He advised. "...You look _ok_ in a bikini. However, Kyle is clearly the one that does look better."

"Hehe, if you say so." This is going great, we're having fun together! I sighed contently, "This date is going on nicely so far."

"I-it's not a d-date!"

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Living room)<br>**

After eating our breakfast, we sat on the couch watching T.V.

"How about Sesame Street?" Kenny offered, flipping through the channels.

"Dude, no. I'd rather watch America's next Top Model." He glanced at me.

"Really?"

"No!" I smirked at his disappointment. "You like that show?"

"Mhm, Tyra Banks is so gorgeous and deep with the contestants, I LOVE HER! She's my hero." The brunette faked a sniffle. "I wish I could be like her someday."

"Dude, gay."

"Says the guy who plays with a guinea pig and was obsessed with Hello Kitty." He retaliated smugly, I gaped.

"Hey, don't bring that up! Those were bad times back then."

"Ha, what made you obsessed with Hello Kitty anyway?" Kenny asked, still flipping through channels.

"...She...she's so cute. I couldn't help myself! Especially Chococat, that black cat." I chattered.

"Pfft, she's not as cute as you." Kenny doted, pinching my cheek fondly. I blushed and slapped his hand away.

"Do not t-touch me!" He nodded apologetic.

"Since nothings really on, we're going to watch Spongebob." The brunette turned to the channel and settled on the yellow character, I stared at him.

"Are you serious right now?" I flabbergasted. "We're not little kids anymore."

"Yea but _no one_ is too old for Spongebob, pfft look, Patrick got hit with a coconut!" He laughed cheerfully, pointing at the screen. I glanced at the T.V and couldn't help but crack a smile.

"Fine, I guess your right, the show is just too funny. However if you tell anyone I said that, I'll hurt you." I threaten.

The episode ended and it went on to another one. It was the one when Squidward and Spongebob had to deliver Krusty Krab pizzas. I don't know what came over me, but I scooted closer to the brunette, I had a urge to be near him. I dared a glance at him, and he smiled, gently curling his arm around my waist and resting his head on my shoulder. I didn't want to reject the warmth I had gotten, so I didn't push him the fuck off (like I should have) and fixed my eyes on the T.V. We sat that way for the next 4 episodes, the way he held me was quite comfortable. Shit, bad thoughts, ignore, ignore!

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

The two teens were back in the attic playing some Naruto game.

"Why'd you pick Kankuro? I'm so going to kill you with Gaara." Craig snorted wisely.

"Kankuro's just as strong! He could easily beat Gaa-chan in shippuden." Kenny insisted. "He has Crow, that puppet, so that's 2 against one!"

"Kankuro is scared shitless of Gaara, he wouldn't dare raise one chakra thread to his younger brother. And what's up with you and puppets anyway?" The brunette giggled shyly.

"I'm a fan boy for guys that use puppets for fighting. Ugh, like Sasori No Danna, he is so hot and freaking epic!" Craig stared at him with a raised brow.

"Sakura murdered him man, and Sakura's weak."

"That's not right, she had the help of Chiyo to defeat him, plus that pink haired bitch is ugly. Hinata's more of my type."

"Hinata isn't that strong either, I like Ino more, she could get inside your mind. Now that's awesome." The raven argued.

"Oh my god, is there anything that we could agree on?" Kenny sighed, they have been disagreeing and disliking each other's favorites for the past 25 minutes.

"Uhm, we both cried when Obito died?" The silver eyed boy suggested.

"Yea! Ok, sweet. Oh, did you get emotional when Naruto and Sasuke fought? I didn't laugh for days." The hazel eyed boy shook his head gloomily.

"Argh, please don't get me on that again. Mad teased me saying 'they're just anime characters', but it's more than that!"

"I know right!"

"_Leave nothing, that resembles a soul of a man! Leave him numb, leave him-"_

The brunette grabbed his phone and turned off the alarm, checking the time.

"Well, we had a great time so far but, I gotta go to work now." Kenny informed reluctantly, having fun with the raven. "Don't worry, Madeleine and Karen should be back from school, my parents should be back from looking for a job. Your parents don't come back till 6 right?"

"Y-Yea, byes." Craig replied. The brunette studied his roommate's orbs and saw sadness and disappointment flash through them.

"Aww, You want me to stay, don't you?" Kenny gushed, the raven only blushed and averted his gaze. "AWW! That is so sweet, I'll be back, I promise." The McCormick leaned down and kissed his cheek, running out the room before he could get yelled at. Stripe whistled.

"I know, Stripe. I need to decide soon." Craig groaned, wiping his cheek.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Finney's Market)<br>**

"Hi Christine!" I greeted happily at my job partner, she smiled.

"Hiya, you seem great."

"I am, I had my first date with my crush. But on to more important matters. By any chance, have you ever tasted...sausage biscuits?" I questioned, I will spread the wonders of them little by little. Christ gave me a weird look.

"Uhm, sure, why?-Ah that'll be $23.65 sir."

"Because, aren't they just amazing? The biscuit part is nice and soft, also buttery!" During my whole shift I blabbed about the breakfast sandwich. I think Christine will now eat sausage biscuits every morning. One down, 6 million more to go.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

I was cheerfully playing with my guinea in peace, when Mad had to burst in. I'm serious, someone always have to ruin my joy time.

"What do you want?" I demanded, petting Stripe's grayish blue fur. My sister had the nerve to walk up, take my friend from me, and sit down. "What the hell!"

"How was spending most of your day with Kenny, hm? Spill." She ordered, I sighed. Of course.

"I have to admit, it was wonderful. He really is kind and funny." Mads nodded approvingly.

"So, that means you've chose to accept your feelings?"

"No, the more I'm starting to like him, the more I'm scared to date him. What if I get too attached to him as I did with her?" I worried. It went silent for a while, then she spoke up.

"Craig, I think it's time. I think you need to confess to Kenny everything that happened. If he still says he loves you, then you better fucking date him. If he rejects you, then I'll fucking choke him, ok?"

"I-it's not that simple! H-"

"Kenny confessed to you about his past didn't he?" Mad pointed out, yet interrupting me. "You said that you look up to him, but you do nothing to be like him."

"What good would it do if I told him? How will that help my problem being scared to be in a relationship again?" I inquired.

"If you tell him, you might be more relieved of the guilt that you have. Plus, aren't you Kenny alike? If you could learn to 'fully love' life as you put it, then you might be braver to accept him." She informed, I blinked.

"You're...you're too smart for your own good." I flabbergasted. "I-I'll tell him everything, though I'm not going to like it."

"You're not suppose to. And don't wimp out!"

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I entered the attic to see Craig sitting cross legged on my futon, has he been waiting for me?

"I've been w-waiting for you..." He told me. Well, that answers my question. "I-I have to confess to you about me, like you did with.." Oh my Jesus! He's going to tell me what happened! OH YES FINALLY! Calm down, calm down.

"Oh, ok." I laid down my bag and sat next to him. Craig appeared very uneasy, slightly breathing hard, I put my hand on his. "You could tell me anything."

"H-her name was China Ellis. That was the girl I dated in 7th grade...she was my first love." The raven began. China, that's a pretty name. "I-I killed her."

"...You what?" I gasped, looking at him surprised. He went right to the point. "Can you start at the very beginning?"

"Mhm." Craig took a deep breath. "In 7th grade, I first saw her. China had long indigo hair, with oval light brown eyes. I liked her from 1st sight, so I asked her out. We had started dating, it was nice. Then our relationship got intimate, that's when my love for her grew into an _obsession_ I guess. 5 months after our relationship, I caught her cheating on me. I felt that no one could love her as I did. I felt that she didn't deserve to even live anymore." He stopped, biting his lip.

"Keep going." I urged, squeezing his hand.

"...The boy China 2 timed me with, was Frank Blackstones. After I had caught her, I revealed to her what I seen. She told me that she was sorry and that it wasn't 'working out'. That pissed me off. China told me that I was getting way too clingy. So I drugged and dragged both of them into the school's meat locker. I tied them to the wall, and waited till they woke.

"I murdered Frank first, I wanted to see China's devastated face when I did so. I went as far as to chop off his head, I enjoyed it. I pressed his detached head next to hers and laughed. I threw the head on a table and slowly killed her, satisfyingly. I slitted her neck, then snapped it with a book that was in my backpack. I slashed her stomach because I wanted as much organs and blood to spill out. Funny, no one knows that I've done it, except my gang and Mad."

"...Craig how did it feel...to see someone you love kiss another? How did you feel to kill the one you love?" I asked unsure. The next thing that happened, made me jump; Craig cried, yet so soft you could barely hear it. The sight made me want to shed tears, Craig Tucker _does not_ cry. He just doesn't.

"N-Nobody had e-ever...asked m-me...how d-did I f-feel..!" He sobbed into his hands. "T-they a-asked me, _why_ I-I've done i-it, but n-never asked _how_ did I-I feel.." I instinctively embraced him, letting him bawl onto my chest, he clenched me back.

"I-I felt lost, rejected, betrayed, broken, furious, confused, and unloved when I saw her kiss Frank. I f-felt delighted, right, appeased, and _exhilarated_, when I murdered both of them. Only after I had both of their blood on me, after they were dead, after the sin I committed, I regretted what I've done. I hate myself for it. I-I really loved h-her, I did! I was another person when I did the murder, I was in another state. I-"

"Shh, shh.." I rubbed his black hair soothingly. "I understand Craig, you went through so much. You don't have to say anymore about it, I won't tell anyone. Oh Craig, I'm so sorry.."

"T-thank you Kenny." He hiccuped, still whimpering. "That's why I don't want you to love me or for me to fall for you. I'm afraid I'll do the same thing, I might get too close with you. I-I don't want to do that again, but it's so hard because m-my heart won't let me."

"If you kill me like you did China, then I'll just come back, and _still_ love you. Nothing can change that. Plus I'll be glad if you're obsessed with me." I assured him, holding him closer. "Why can't you understand that?"

"I don't even know why I'm falling for you, after so long of not feeling anything for anybody, let alone someone I had once hated.." Craig sniffled miserably.

"You can't figure out why you like me? Well, let me tell you why I'm in love with you. I love you Craig because when I was going through the worst of my depression, you made me feel not alone. You kinda made me realize that, there are other people who are like me. I love you because you gave me the courage to show my full face. I love you because you're cute and adorable. I love you because you're difficult. I love you because you make me laugh, and that you gave me the ability to break free from _my_ mistakes. So maybe, now I could help you break away from yours." I confessed to the raven, brushing tears off his face.

"Do you really have no idea of why you're liking me like this?"

"...I guess it's because you truly love life, which I can't. I'm still stuck in my past, which is pathetic. You're so cheerful and careless that I'm jealous of it. You're also one of the f-few people that can make me happy." Craig mumbled thinking. "I'm still not sure why I'm feeling this way." I blinked shocked.

"I-I make you happy?" He raised his head, and I swear to god, Craig full on smiled. I mean, he smiles, but he Full On smiled. It was absolutely beautiful.

"Mhm, like today. I did have a great little date with you. However I'm scared to accept it." He let go of me and went back to his own space. "What If I do hurt you?"

"Then I'll forgive you. Trust me Craig, I'll never stop loving you, I'm that kind of person." I thought of Kevin, and how I could never quit loving him. "I'll say this again, and keep saying it, I'll wait for you, for as long as it takes. I love you Craig." He gazed at me for a moment, deep in thought.

"What...what do you think of me, now that you know my past?" I answered right away.

"Basically, the same. Except now I know we're even more alike, you have trouble loving, like I did when Kevin and I first broke up. You're still the same Jack-Ass who flips off everyone, you're no different." Craig paused, then rested his face in his arms.

"Thank you Kenny, thank you. It's getting late, I'm going to bed." He got up and went to his side, grabbing Cow and getting settled. Before I could do the same, I noticed that he looked stiff, probably from the stitches on his back. I crept under the covers with him, and started massaging his back gingerly. Craig gasped from my sudden intrusion, then moaned in relief from the pain. I sensually kissed his neck multiple times, he sighed.

"I love you Craig." I hummed. After a silence, he finally answered the 4 words I've been waiting for.

"I...I love you too." I smiled against his skin and snaked my arms around him, bringing him closer to my body. We slept together that night.

* * *

><p><strong>Hmm, I should make a little story of when Kenny and his friends wear bikinis ;o<strong> _O kakuninshitekudasai!_ _(Google translate that if you don't know what it means)_ _or, REVIEW PLEASE!_


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Yip yip it's published! Sorry if this chap seem slow.  
><strong>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 15: The Decision and Cards<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

I awoke in a pleasant warmness, and found I was in Kenny's arms. I gazed up at his face for a moment, have I finally decided on my decision? Mads had told me maybe if I confess my past, I'd be ridden of this guilt. I still have regret for what I've done, but is regret and guilt really the same thing? I confessed that I loved him, did I actually mean that, or was I just overcome with feelings? I_ was_ out of character, though talking about China always make me that way. And if I do get into an relationship with Kenny, will I hurt him? He promised that he'd forgive me and still love me, however could I take that for granted? Perhaps he will still love me, and maybe I won't hurt him. Things have gotten so far during these last days, it's time for me to decide.

China Ellis, my first and only (well I guess not _only _anymore) love. She was in my heart for so long, filled with hatred and devotion. Murdering the poor girl felt so right at the time, I thought no one else could love her the way I do, if I couldn't have her, nobody could. She was my everything, I lived everyday thinking of her, stalking her, watching her, talking to her, calling her, buying things for her, and dreaming of her. I've confused love with obsession. Seeing another boy with my girl infuriated me. I felt that she was all I had, and I lost it. Killing both of them in a deranged way was justice to me. The first time China kissed my mouth, is when my fetish for her began. Kenny has yet to touch my lips, so if he ever does, will I do the same thing?

I'm seriously starting to see the problem here. I keep questioning every little action that _might_ happen. The brunette probably didn't do this when he moved on to fully love life. He didn't question what would happen if he didn't wear his costume, he didn't question what would happen if he quit being a slut, he didn't question what would happen if he confess to me, and if he did ask all those things, the only thing that matters is that _he took the risk_. I recall one time when him and I were walking home, and I inquired what if Mad rejects his sister, he said_ 'I'm that sort of person who likes to take chances.'_ And if my sister doesn't accept Karen that way, at least she's sure of it. She wouldn't be walking the rest of her days wondering 'What if...?'. Kenny is so right on that, living on pondering the might have been is torture. Why can't I be like him? Why am I just so afraid of the future and the consequences of my actions? Mads is right, if I look up to Kenny, to fully love life, to move on, to show my emotions, why am I doing nothing to attain my goals? I think I've decided. My decision is to 'listen to my heart.' I snuggled my face affectionately against his chest, he smelled of honey and chestnuts.

However I don't think I could handle being with him for another 6 hours. I checked the clock, he had time to get ready for school and leave. I gingerly shook Kenny, he groan fluttering his hazel eyes (I'll agree with Kevin, his orbs are quite beautiful) and focused his view onto me.

"Hm, good morning." The brunette murmured, smiling. He laid his hand in my hair adoringly, I had the urge to yell about that, but I've already decided. I need to get used to accepting my feelings, which wanted more of Kenny's fondling.

"Go to school, I'll be fine, my back is less stiff. Trust me, besides Kevin is home anyways right?" I assured, breathing against his neck. He sighed reluctantly.

"Alright, I'll leave. But you better be ok when I come back." The brunette pecked my forehead.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Walking to school)<strong>

Last night was was marvelous, yet disturbing. My emotionless Craig had once held an obsession with a girl named China. Now that I think about it, I remember someone in my class with that name, though I paid no attention. I recall the rumors and some of the girls mourning, wearing only black for a week. They must have been China's friends. My poor Craig, no wonder he had hated me. I mirrored himself, someone who couldn't enjoy life. Though now he loves me, since I reflect the person he wants to be. I make him happy, I can't believe that. But weirdly, I don't think he is a murderer, love just makes you do things. I would have never infer that he went through or would have done a crime like that. Although I think nothing of it, I even love him more for what he committed.

My friends all stared at my with curiosity, seeing my wide smile.

"What the hell happened yesterday?" Cartman demanded.

"Yea, you seem to be really chipper." Kyle commented."I thought you was supposed to still be at home today."

"You and Craig did 'it', uh?" Stan snickered, I grinned bigger.

"He told me he loves me." I revealed cheerfully, Eric clasped my shoulder proudly, Kyle and Stan squealed in a girlish manner.

"Congrats dude! So ya'll are dating now?" Stan asked.

"No, Craig hasn't said yet." I replied. "Oh and Ky, I'm here because he wanted me to go to school today. Anyways, it's best if I don't be around him for awhile, he needs to think."

"Ahem, my question is ignored. What the hell happened on your date?" Cartman ordered again.

"We told stories about hanging out with our friends, we watched Spongebob, we played Naruto, he confessed to me what happened in 7th grade, and we slept together. And no Stan, we didn't do 'it'." I chuckled as he appeared disappointed.

"Wait, what occurred in 7th grade?" The redhead asked, I shook my head.

"I promised that I wouldn't tell anyone. Unless he gives me permission to tell you all, my mouth is zipped." I shrugged, they all groaned.

"Not faaair." Cartman whined. "Can you at least give us an hint?"

"Nope, sorry. Let's talk about Tweek," Kyle reddened. "I think we need to get our little fire crotch to tell the little coffee kitten about his _undying _love for him." I laughed.

"Sh-shut up! I don't have undying love for him! It's merely a innocent crush." The Broflovski declared puffing, the raven ruffled his hair.

"Tch, yah. You have to admit, Kenny is close to having an relationship and he was a wimp! You should be able to confess to Tweek about your feeling." Stan mentioned.

"Besides, Stanley turned you down, who else you got?" Eric teased kindly, Kyle punched his shoulder as the Marsh tensed slightly.

"Heh, anyways," I stated, changing subject, "How about we do him like ya'll kinda did me-"

"That didn't sound right."

"Quiet Cartman." I giggled. "As I was saying, let's get Ky to confess in school today, put some confidence in him."

"Wait, how come your confessing operation was longer, and mines is like a 1 day process?" The Jew looked at me quizzically, I shrugged again.

"Because Craig is difficult and Kenny had first to deal with his problem. But you have no issues, you just got no backbone!" Stan answered for me.

"So it's all agreed, our sweet flaming bush will tell Tweek at lunch!" Cartman declared, we all nodded except Kyle.

"I didn't agree to no such thing!" He exclaimed.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

"Guess what?" I took Stripe out of her burrow, cuddling her in my hands. "I'm pretty sure you've overheard my conversation with him last night, so you shouldn't be surprise that I choose to accept my affection for him." She squeaked approvingly.

"Thanks, yea I'm still kinda hesitant about the whole idea. I want to start being like him, I want to love life, I want to-" My friend stopped me in my glorious speech, asking an important question.

"..I don't know actually._ How_ will I begin this relationship with Kenny, and become a much life loving person? I've decided, but I haven't even thought about how I will achieve my goals!" I groaned, sitting Stripe down, she squeaked.

"Yes, I could start it by asking him out, although I-I'm not ready for something like that, unless he's the one bringing it up." I mused, she suggested something else. "No, I can't just kiss him out of nowhere." The guinea pig twitched her whiskers indignantly .

"I'm not complicated!" I hissed, getting in her furry face. "Sorry for resisting my feelings for 2 years and being unsure about what to do about them!" Stripe poked her wet nose against mines.

"...Fine...you win cheater, too damn cute." I sat back up and folded my arms. "I could try to hint that I'm ready to be in a relationship with him?" She whistled an approval, I sighed.

"Good, now how will I do that? And I swear to God, I'm not gonna flirt with him." The greyish blue rodent squeaked an idea.

"Kevin? How will he help me?" She answered. "Well, I guess he does know about Kenny, alright I'll see."

* * *

><p>I knocked on my old room's door, I missed this place so much.<p>

"You may enter Craig." He permitted wizardly. I stepped in, he was on the floor writing something.

"What are you doing?" I inquired, cocking my head to see if I could catch what he's doodling.

"Homework, my friend had gotten it for me. Do you need me? It's about your little date yesterday isn't it?" Kevin grinned knowingly, I blushed lightly. One day, I promise that I will kill him.

"Mhm..I've decided to love your b-brother. But I don't know how I should show him, since I don't want to ask him straight out. May you teach me how to show my affection, except not too much...?" I asked reluctantly. Cannot believe I'm reaching for advise about this. I knew very well how to express myself, even if I over did it by stalking. However after the incident I learned to just keep my feelings inside, thinking that I couldn't control them and they were only to be crushed.

The shaven teen studied me with an serious angry face, the air in the room didn't seem all that sweet at the moment. Does he not want me to love Kenny, since he loves him as well? No, I recall that he personally sought me to give the brunette the love he couldn't offer. So perhaps he's being protective.

"Are you completely sure? You have no doubts about your choice?" Kevin interrogated.

"_Well,_ I do have doubts...but I don't care about that anymore. Ok maybe I care a little bit, though I'm willing to ignore that." I was now switching positions on my feet uncomfortably. He kept leering hard, eyes not wavering.

"And why are you willing to ignore that for my brother? Why do you _suddenly_ accept Kenny?" The earring boy asked. I gulped, one too many good questions.

"Uhm I'm willing to because I want to be like Kenny. I suddenly accept him because...uhh..." I fiddled with my fingers, he glared. "...I told him about my problem, he promised that it wouldn't affect him."

"So why do you love Ken?"

"I still don't know, but he makes me happy." I smiled genuinely. "My admiration for him mostly explains my feelings, I guess." Kevin held the iron gaze as he instantly stood up, marched forward and looked down upon me. I really never noticed how tall he was, about 5 inches higher, extra intimidating. I squared my shoulders and puffed out my chest. If I could beat a man with a gun, I could handle him. Surprisingly, Kevin beamed brightly and embraced me with a breath taking bear hug, rocking me side to side.

"YAY! I'm so happy, finally you've made your choice!" He cheered, then out of nowhere, "Took you damn long enough. But YAY!"

Something inside of me desired to push the delighted teen off, though If I'm going to start being used to accepting my emotions I had to acknowledge it. I slowly hugged back, though firmly. It felt nice and warm, a feeling I missed. A thought occurred to me.

"You know, Kenny acts just like you with this cheering." I smirked, Kevin shook his head mirthfully.

"No, I get this from _him._ He's always the sunniest remember." He chuckled, going back to his old humorous self. He dragged me over to the bed and sat me down. "Okay, I'll help you learn how to show your affection. But what do you mean by 'not too much.'?"

Greaat. I assume I could tell Kevin about my past, he is trustworthy. I have nothing against him and I have to admit he is a like a brother to me as well. I also need his assistance. I took a deep breath and revealed to him everything I had told Kenny last night, plus what his brother had said when I confessed to him about this. Luckily, I only sobbed barely, I'm getting better. When I was done, he was rubbing circles in my back like he did when I first saw the brunette die. The small familiar gesture is strangely calming.

"I don't have anything to say really, Ken basically had stated the same thing I'd say. Maybe not the love part though. I see what you're afraid of now, and it's ok. Loving again after so long is terrifying but I'm here for you." Kevin ruffled my hair.

"Quit that damn it!" I exclaimed, hey I might let people hug me, but I can't change all of myself, I'm a Tucker for Christ Sakes. I have _limits._ "Thanks though...you really do treat me like a brother."

"Duh, if my Kenny will marry you in the near future then I'm going to have to get used to you." He teased, I growled. "Anyways, to show your affection, though not too much, you could make him a gift." I blinked.

"What?" I'm not exactly the 'creative and artsy' type.

"He got you a guinea pig to show his love, so if you make something, it'll represent your appreciation." Kevin elaborated. "He doesn't come back until his shift is over, so we have time. By the way, you look different."

"I do?" I instinctively patted my face. "Maybe it's the scars, the doctors said it may develop over time." He shook his head again disagreeing, and smiled.

"It's not that. You smile more, your face is more brighter. That's one side effect of being around Kenny."

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Lunchroom)<br>**

"C'mon Ky, he's RIGHT over there." Stan pestered. "Just GO!" The redhead insisted on stabbing his tatter tots with the spork.

"Get some back bone! Oh my gosh, it's just Tweek, what is he going to do? Spill his coffee on you?" Eric exasperated, the Jew gave him a look.

"If yer don't get yer freckled face over to that table down yonder, I'll whip yer yellow belly, lily liver ass! And yer ma will hear bout this t'night, so get up boy!" I ordered in my impression of my dad when he's drunk and mad. Cartman and Stan busted up laughing, Kyle's mouth threaten to smile, but he was stubborn. We were trying to get him to confess to the coffee kitten.

"There's way too many people over there. I refuse to ask him out in front of his gang, that's like rule 1." He pointed out.

"Ugh you're so weak! Yet you're the smartest in our class." Cartman groaned, I laughed.

"Damn straight I am." Kyle nodded.

"Lunch is going to end soon. Look, how about we walk with you over to the table, and distract Token and Clyde. While that's happening, you could talk with Tweek." Stan planned. "Does that fit your taste?"

"It sounds nice. However I'll just look like a wimp-"

"Which you are."

"Shut up Ken. I'm going to simply walk over there and do it. I don't need anybody!" Kyle stood up determined. "I'm my on men!"

"Praise the lord!" Cartman joked. "Fire crotch is strong!"

"Amen!" Stan put in. "Our Jew is movin' on up!"

"Hallelujah! His God is raining bravery down on him!" I teased.

"...I hate you guys, with intimacy." We watched as Broflovski walked shakily though boldly towards the table. We couldn't hear what was said, but it went something like this,

Clyde speaks to him first, seemingly cautious about Kyle's sudden presence.

Kyle assures nothing's wrong, glances at Tweek shyly, the blonde waves timidly.

Token observes the gesture and understands. Whispers something in Clyde's ear, they move a little off.

Tweek gazes after them alarmed, stuttering on about something. Kyle calms him down by touching his shoulder. Some talk, Tweek blushes and nods. Kyle smiles and comes back.

"Well, what happened?" I prodded grinning.

"I got a coffee date with him after school." The redhead glowed. "I'm so excited!"

"Woot!" Cartman patted his back.

"Congrats dude." Stan acclaimed.

"Sweet, you reeled him in nicely." I winked. Kyle smiled anxiously.

"Thanks guys, I'm so nervous! I hope I don't bore him."

"Tch, please you'd never put Tweek to sleep. I don't think anyone can." Stan assured smirking.

"Heh, I hope you're right. Did you guys see that sexy way he twitched his body while I was over there? Amazing right?" Kyle gushed. "I was scared I'd get a nosebleed!"

"...Dude, weird." We deadpanned in unison.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Attic)<strong>

_Dear Mr. Whisper,_

_Hey, I know I haven't wrote to you in some time (2 years), since I have Stripe to talk to. I know you missed me, do you feel neglected? You shouldn't be, because I still do think of you. So I have some news you've didn't get to hear. One, I don't like Hello Kitty anymore, how great is that? In 8th grade, Token and Clyde had tricked me into having a sleep over and when Tweek and I were playing, they slowly stole all of my Kitty merchandise and gave it to Butters. After beating the crap out of them and not speaking to them for a month, I thanked them._

_ Another thing that had happened, the McCormick family had moved in about 2 weeks ago. Yes, that means I have to live with Kenny, the person I hated the most on the forsaken planet. You won't believe how it changed so drastically, I love him now. Shocking, I know. Kenny really isn't the person I thought he was-remember what I had told you in the past letters?-Yea, he actually went through torture and got pass all that misery. The kid suffered from depression that he caused upon himself. He feels distant from all of the normal humans, do to our ability of dieing and staying that way. Kenny could do the same, but come back. Trust me I saw it for with my own eyes. There's so much I need to write, though I'll only give you quick short details for now. He knows what I've done in the past to China, he doesn't care and still loves me. I want to be like him, to enjoy life, so I'll start by expressing my emotions, with the aid of Kevin. Hopefully not too much._

_P.S: Sorry for the short letter._

_ Write back?_

* * *

><p>I smirked as I closed the journal, realizing I still use my old signature of asking 'Write back?' knowing well that Mr. Whisper is incapable of doing so. I just had always wished he would have replied, if once. I don't know why I suddenly wanted to write to him after so long. Perhaps if anyone would ever read this, the journal wouldn't end with the page of my murder. Abruptly, Kevin burst through the door, carrying a backpack.<p>

"I know now! I know how you could show that you adore him!" He came excitedly next to me, and rested the package on the bed. I flipped my bang cautiously.

"What is it?" His smile broaden, if possible.

"You'll make Kenny a love card!" Kevin squealed, the two brothers are seriously alike.

"Oh fuck no." I said bluntly, though mortified.

"Aw, please? I'll let you put sparkles on it." He tempted poorly.

"Still fuck no. It's way too girly and gay." I cringed, yet blushing. The last time I had made a card(or 246 cards, who's counting?) was for China. "And _sparkles_ is just making it worst. Besides, Why would Kenny want one?"

"Excellent! Boy I love it when people are cooperative." Kevin smiled as he took out construction paper, crayons, and such. "He'd want it because Ken thinks cards are one of the greatest signs of affection. Especially and only, homemade ones."

"Why does he think that? I thought sex was the biggest way to show it."

"Hm, you have to remember that Kenny and I always had intercourse with our clients. So it wasn't really anything to us. Sex is something we did for money, and it could be thrown around everywhere. People easily cheat, abuse, and are addicted to sex. But to Kenny, cards are more valuable and pure, something that only the beloved can create. Cards have words of endearment, or a drawing of joy, or a poem of passion. He thinks sex could never be like that, it has too much lust with no room for love." The teen elaborated. "He says cards are permanent, lasts for a lifetime if kept safe. Sex only lasts the time it extends, it could never be held secure."

"He...he sounds so morbid and deep." I mused quietly. "I'm noticing I don't even actually know Kenny that well, I've never knew he had these kinds of thoughts...I've never saw cards and sex in that view before. Or even _compared_ them.."

This just causes my admiration for the brunette to grow. He thinks so differently from everyone else, yet so misunderstood and confused, he finds cards more suitable for love than sex, he hid himself from the world, he shows himself to the world, he can't die, and so many other things. Kenny is a beautiful creature to me. A beautiful mysterious entity that glows a shine into my life. My heart, it's fluttering. Is this what it felt like for China? No, it's different, much different. I have a sudden urge to clutch my chest in the magnificence of this new/old overwhelming feeling. I love Kenny.

"Dude, I'm his brother, it's obvious I'd be aware of these things." Kevin chuckled. "I see what you mean though, you two don't speak a lot unless alone. if you want to know more about him, then attempt talking with him when you get the chance."

"I'll try that. You kept saying you and him 'did' sex, does that mean you quit being an whore too?" I inquired, he nodded grinning.

"Mhm! I stopped today, my family and I are becoming better for ourselves and each other. We had a good talk awhile ago. I'm so glad everything is getting well. Karen's surely relieved." I blinked taken aback, I'll be damned. Those punks for parents are actually being real adults, that deserves some praise.

"That's great, finally they're doing something." I commented, then looking down at the materials. "What type of card should I make?"

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I walked into the kitchen to find my older sibling and roommate chatting and eating sandwiches together as if they had always done it. I raised both eyebrows at them amused, how adorable was this? I would had stood there watching for the whole time, if Kevin didn't sense me behind him.

"Welcome back!" He greeted, awfully exhilarated. The raven turned around to see me and instantly turned away. Oh that's a good sign right? Kev got up and lifted him out of his seat.

"By the way Kenny, Craig has something for you." Kevin informed joyfully, pushing the Tucker my way, he flipped him off. I gaped shocked.

"R-Really? You have something for me?" I asked, the silver eyed boy glanced back at me unsure.

"Yea, it's in the attic.."

"Well, go on and show him already! We don't got all day!" My brother laughed while the teen glared steely.

* * *

><p>"H-Here..I made you this." Craig handed me a card, folded side ways. He averted his orbs from me. It was light pink with a red heart on the front and sparkles. I opened the card and smiled. It read,<p>

_Thanks for taking care of me, here's a poem.._

_~Roses are red_

_My love was dead_

_Violets are blue_

_But you came through_

_Roses are red_

_Lies were said_

_Violets are blue_

_But you are true~_

"Aww! Thank you for this, it's so nice and cute!" I gushed, he blushed furiously but nodded. "I don't exactly understand what the poem means though.."

"Er, when I said 'my love was dead' I was referring to my affection for China and how it ended, then you came a-along and now it's alive again. There was a lot of lies in my old relationship, though y-you seem more t-truthful..." Craig explained.

Is he saying that I put the life back into his heart? Is he trying to communicate his feelings? I kissed his cheek softly, he didn't complain or reject it. I wanted to ask if we're dating, although I didn't want to push it. Instead, I pulled him down with me on to the futon and hugged him. Craig shyly wrapped his arms around me back, a surprise. I think he's trying to get used to his feelings more often and respond to them. I have to ask some questions.

"Do you feel better?" I asked.

"Yes."

"...Do you really love me?" He nodded silently, I sighed.

"...Are you ready to date me?" I ventured, uncertain of his reaction.

"Y-yes, but I want to t-take it slow. No kissing on the l-lips." Craig warned, my heart soared. He's mine now, I own him!

"You're serious? Oh my gosh yay!" I hugged him tighter. "I promise you I'll be the best partner you could have!"

"L-Let me go Kenny! I can't breathe!" The silver eyed boy's face redden. "And you're forgetting about my b-back!"

"Eep, I'm sorry. I'm just so happy, you're my boyfriend! But why can't I kiss you on the lips? That doesn't seem fair." I pouted.

"I'm afraid my obsession will start if you do, like the last time. So if we don't kiss too soon, maybe it won't happen. I just don't want to hurt you."

"I understand, you need time to move on like I did. I'll wait for you as long as it takes. I want ALL of you." I smiled, snuggling closer to him.

"T-there's one problem though. I don't feel like I know you well, so when is there time when we could talk?" He asked. "It won't be much of a relationship if we only spend 20 minutes of the day with each other."

"Hm, how about Saturday? I'm off work and you're off school. Oh crud Karen!" I shot up quickly. Saturday, before that is Friday!

"What about Karen?" Craig sat up as well, though not all that alarmed.

"The dance is in 2 days and she still hasn't confessed! The little coward! How the hell will we get her to spill before it's too late?" I groaned, shutting my eyes. We mused about this situation for a minute, then my roommate spoke up.

"I think I know how. Mad loves the UFC, so Karen could beat up Brad and win her?" Craig suggested, I stared at him. The plan sounded so familiar...someone had said this before, who?

"It's so insane it's perfect! However, my little sister is a cheer leader, she doesn't know the first thing about fighting. Let alone a boy."

"Tch, you and Kevin fought well with those men when you died. You could teach her a little something." He assured smiling. Again, when he smiles it's the absolutely beautiful sight in the world.

"Heh, I guess you're right. But we only know street fighting, no actual wrestling moves. Didn't you do a high kick to that guy's face? You could teach her." The raven quickly shook his head.

"I watched some UFC with Mad and 'played' with her, so I do know some moves. Though I think it'd be best if you teach Kare, I'm not the patient type with teaching things." He grunted, I laughed.

"You're not that nice of a person are you?"

"Nope." Craig smirked.

* * *

><p><strong>EEEEK The next chapter is the last one ;O!(FINALLY!) And I think I need to <strong>**balance out Craig's character, he's becoming way too frigging soft!  
><strong>


	16. Chapter 16

_A/N: Waaah my story is at it's end! T.T But Hooray for new South Park episodes this 14th! :D The first part in this chapter is telling what happened on the last 2 days. Cheesy Chapter title, I know!  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 16: Loving Life, Loving you, Is my End, Our End<br>**

* * *

><p><strong>*Karen's POV*<strong>

On Thursday, Kenny had taken Craig's advice and taught me fighting moves with Kevin. I hadn't fancied the idea that much.

"Why do I have to duel Brad for Mad?" I had huffed, just not noticing how perfectly the two names rhyme. Brad and Mad. My brothers and Craig were all in the Kevin's room. The raven had sat on the edge of bed watching us amused with his chin resting in his hand, though uncomfortable. I think he is still awkward about dating Kenny and us knowing. Although we welcomed him eagerly.

"You gotta go in combat because one, you're a damn wimp who can't tell Madeleine how you feel, even when she plain said she wants you to!" Kenny pointed how grinning.

"And that the dance is coming soon so this is really all you got left kid." Kevin added. "Besides, I had offered the plan to beat him up a _long_ time ago, remember?"

In order to start the fighting lesson, they told me I had to tie my long dark brown hair into a pony tail, preventing the boy from pulling it. Kevin then taught me how to kick effectively, since he worked most in that department. Luckily, my cheer leading practices made it easier for me to not get tired as quickly and be more flexible. I learned to kick hard low and high instantly, Kev's hands being the punching bag. Craig also put in his tips on punting as well, saying keep my balance on the foot I use for staying on the ground. After doing that for 15 minutes, Kenny took his turn, teaching me how to punch and charge correctly. I had no great arm strength(duh), so slugging Brad wasn't my best chance. When I moved on to charging, I tried pushing the brunette over like he displayed to me with Kevin, though he didn't move an inch. In the corner of my eye, I had saw Craig smirking.

"That's not funny! I can't knock down a heavy person!" I had complained in anger, seeing the Tucker's smile. Kenny snickered and demonstrated an accurate push with our brother once more. The brunette attacked well, getting him down. I tried this a few more times and succeeded. Lastly, we worked on blocking and dodging, which was an simple task. My older brothers praised that I am a fast learner and will be a expert in rumbling with random people on the streets.

The next day at school, Mads and I had walked into the gates when I spotted Brad's blonde hair. The next thing I knew, I was dashing towards him, leaping into the air to attain more force (picked that up from Ken) and flatten the boy onto the ground. I heard Mad's voice yelling my name, though I didn't stop. My brothers were right, my unexpected and abrupt attack got him by surprise, so I had the chance to smash his face with my fists. Brad twisted his body and I was now on the bottom, getting my face bruised. It had hurt like hell, but I instinctively blocked and twirled my waist around, getting him off me. I stood up and started stomping Brad, I was about to do more damage when a teacher pulled me away. I hadn't even notice the crowd of students cheering on the fight, except I did saw Mad and her cute smirk gazing at me and clapping.

"Nice work McCormick." She approved as I was escorted into the school by the teacher. I had blushed and nodded. Yes I did it!

Sadly, I got a 2 day suspension for assault and pounding my feet into Brad's ribs. My other punishment was that I couldn't go to the dance. When I had left the Principle's office, I found Mads standing outside it. She abruptly hugged and kissed my lips, I almost fainted.

"You know, you could have just _told_ me how you felt. You didn't have to go all ape and beat up my date." She grinned sweetly. "I'm glad though, I didn't know a guy I was about to go out with could lose to a cheer leader!"

"Y-You like m-me t-too?" I stammered, dizzily.

"Of course idiot! Thought that'd be obvious since I kissed you." Mads shook her curls disappointingly. "So, that means we could go to the dance together now right?"

"N-no. I'm suspended for fighting." Strangely, my tomboy beamed.

"Great! I only wanted to go to that dance because all the other girls were going. Sweet, you and me could have like an anti-prom or something!" And that's how on Friday night, I was with Mads in her room having a Gothic theme slumber party. Better than it sounds, especially when we went to sleep...hehe.

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

Another thing had happened on Friday, the boys had announced their relationship to their parents and friends. Craig of course, was slightly reluctant of telling his parents, since they knew how sensitive he is about dating after the death of China. Kenny had started comforting him, though the raven declared that he didn't need someone to always hold his hand when he's having trouble. When they had revealed their relationship, the adults were thrilled. Mr. Tucker said the change from hating Kenny, to liking Kenny, then finally dating Kenny is astonishing. The raven had fumed at this comment, causing him to give the bird, which revolved in an Tucker family argument. The hazel eyed teen snickered quietly next to his boyfriend, observing the feud. It went something like this,

"Craig, please do not show your middle finger to your father."

"You don't need to defend me Belle! I can handle this twerp blind folded."

"Don't you raise your voice at her, and I'm certainly not a twerp!"

"Fine, you're not a twerp. You're a RUNT."

"Calm down honey. Look Thomas, we've been over this dozens of times. I can lecture _our_ kids as much as you can."

"Yes though when an problem is put into my view, _I'm_ the one who's suppose to solve it, not you."

"How about you guys just be fucking happy that I'm dating again and we all shut the hell up so I can leave?"

"Craig, no swearing!" Both Mrs. and Mr. Tucker yelled at the same time. The stormy orb boy rolled his eyes and flipped them off with both fingers, they returned it gracefully. During this, the McCormick parents were watching alarmed, but entertained. Later, they told their friends the news, who congratulated and prayed for the best.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Saturday)<strong>

Bent over, I kissed my boyfriend's forehead blissfully. He woke up slowly, and stared at me for a second.

"Good...morning." Craig snaked his arms around my neck and tugged me down with him. I brought my arms around his waist and snuggled. I'm so blithe now, that I have him. Though we haven't been talking much together, today is our first _official_ date. So we will definitely spend quality time with each other today.

"You know, you've really have been expressing your feelings lately." I whispered, nuzzling against his black hair, surprisingly soft.

"Tch, no I-I haven't. I haven't even kissed you yet, you're always the one making it. Or I haven't said 'I love you' first..." Craig pointed out sadly. It's true, the relationship so far feels one sided. For the past couple of days, I'm always the one showing affection and him returning it. Sometimes I feel like he'll start to say he loves me, but he holds it back. He'll only say he loves me when I say it first. Also, Craig will lean forward, just inches from kissing my cheek, then he'll pull back abruptly. My heart aches at this routine, however I have to wait for him, like I promised.

"It's okay if you can't do those things yet, it just matters that you feel the same for me. Besides, you still show your emotions good enough." I hummed, tangling my legs within his. The difference in Craig's face and voice is unbelievable. Assuming he's happy, his lips would speak words with such cheer, his face glows. Unfortunately, if my raven catches that you've witnessed this part of him, he'll immediately revert back to being stoic.

"...Have I been doing stuff..that could be considered 'adhesive'?" He asked worriedly. This is the 8th time he has questioned if he was being clingy, wondering if he's starting to be obsessive.

"No, of course not." I answered. "But I wouldn't mind if you've gotten _closer_ to me, if you know what I mean..." Craig blushed vividly and pushed me away.

"Damn pervert. I'm gonna go brush my teeth." He grunted, exiting the attic.

I sighed yearningly, if only we could do just a bit more then kissing cheeks and holding each other. Why is he so afraid of growing a fetish for me? I'll never cheat on him, leave him, or hurt him. Furthermore, if he does kill me for whatever reason, I'll clearly come back. Ready to accept his apology and give him a another chance. Scratch that, I'll give him a thousand chances, millions! Craig is mine, he completes me, he awards me with strength, he lets me know silently that I'm not alone. In fact, I think _I'm_ going to be the obsessive one in this relationship. I don't ever want to lose him, I truly love him with all my heart. I know how he makes me feel, but how do I make him feel? What if I don't make him feel anything, and that's why he doesn't kiss me? My breathing is getting harder, I'm going back into Mode. Calm down, he loves me, he said so himself. I just need to help him express it more.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*(Kitchen)<strong>

"The house seems to be much improved! Everything is much more cheerier, with the boys and girls dating each other." Mom had commented, chewing her toast. I was sat next to Kenny, the parents on the other side of the table.

I really don't see how everything's happier, if anything this place is more quieter. Since I'm not yelling at the brunette as much. I glanced at Kenny and saw him already staring at me with those adoring hazel orbs. My eye twitched, blushing I went back to my food. Then realizing my action could have been viewed as an rejection, I reached under the table and squeezed his hand firmly for a second, he made an satisfying giggle. I groaned inwardly, how the hell am I suppose to adjust my emotions when I can't show them completely? Kenny claims I'm getting better, yet I'm not so sure. What if I'm not sufficient as a boyfriend? If I don't show him how much I admire him, then he'll surely leave me, feeling unloved. Why can't I ever keep anyone I cherish? I mentally gave myself the bird, I have to be optimistic, in order to fully love this life. I have to work for achieving my bliss, which right now is the McCormick. The adults went on talking.

"So, how about your boy Kevin? Is he dating any young cute _girl_?" My dad asked, totally emphasizing the girl part. Kenny and I smirked, our fathers are overly disappointed that their sons are fags. Except we go both ways, mostly me. The blonde poser had told me that the only reason he tolerated making out with women when he was a whore, is because of their chest. But if men grow boobs, he would, and quote, 'be hardcore gay'.

"Ah, Kevin? He's great, though a bit slow." Mrs. McCormick chirped. When my parents appeared confused on the slow part, Stuart added more detail.

"We encouraged our eldest son to date again, though he's taking baby steps." Mr. McCormick explained.

"Oh, little Craig here was just the same after his break up. Sadly, his last ex-girlfriend was dreadfully murder. However it seems your Kenny perked him up finely." Dad gave me a shit eating grin.

"_'little_ Craig'?" I seethed. before I could lecture him about my being 15 and giving him a nice picture of my finger, mom caught on to what was going to occur and spoke up.

"Ahem, may I ask about your doing in getting a new job now?" She inquired.

"We've been meaning to tell you, Stuart got a shift at mechanics and I at this fashion store. We can't thank you enough for your help." The red head smiled so genuinely and prettily, I even sucked in my breath. In spite of her greasy braided hair, and crooked teeth, her smile exposes her true beauty. I only thought her clear blue eyes shown how good she looked, since they displayed how young she is.

"Indeed, you guys are practically saints. We should be able to move out in about 2 weeks and get into a stable apartment. If there's anything you'd need, come to us first. We'll try to give what we can for paying you back" The Scotch hat wearing male promised. I paused for a moment, hearing they'll be moving out soon. Funny, I longed for this day to come, now I don't want it. I caught Kenny gazing at me again.

"It'll be alright," He mouthed. "We can always see each other at school, call or text, and on weekends." I nodded.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*(Attic)<strong>

"Where you wanna go baby?" I snickered as I got hit with a pillow by a redden raven. The dude hates it when I call him pet names, though I love his reactions. We were preparing for our official date, changing clothes. After a long silence, Craig confessed,

"...I have no idea where I want to go. I haven't gone out with anybody in years, I also don't want to be picky. What do you want to do?" I scratched my head ashamed.

"You and I are both noobs in the dating industry. How about we start off at Stark's Pond?" I suggested.

"If we're going to have a picnic then I'm just going to sleep all day. That's way too fucking gay and girly." The guinea pig lover scrunched up his nose in disgust. I laughed.

"What's wrong with that? Besides you're _exactly_ girly and gay!" That earned me another smack to the body by Cow. How dare he use the toy I've given him against me? That's so adorable.

"If you haven't notice, I'm obviously the man in this relationship. You're the female." He snorted.

"Wait, wait, what?" I stumbled. "If YOU haven't notice, you're always blushing and pushing me away when I touch you too much! You're clearly the uke!"

"Pfft, that's because I'm claustrophobic-"

"Liar!" I rolled over laughing from the dumb lie.

"Shut the hell up. Plus you're shorter than me, that automatically makes me the top person." Craig pointed out, he kinda had me there.

"Fine, I'll accept that that's true. However you are forgetting you stutter more than me! Like a innocent shy girl." I grinned.

"Ok, the female is always the cutest, the male is always the hottest. I'm the hot one, you're the cute one." I gasped.

"Are you serious? I'm not hot, though YOU'RE the most adorablestester thing I know! Besides Stripe of course." My love blushed faintly.

"I-I'm am not cute! I'm a man!" He growled.

"Oh? The way you stuttered just now was pretty adorable." Craig fumed. "And the way you're getting angry like you're going to choke me is cute." I smiled.

"Alright, I curse more than you. The seme has a dirtier mouth than the uke."

"Yes, but I have a dirtier _mind_ than you." My roommate glared a cold glare at me. "Hehe, face it, you're on the bottom, I'll be on top."

"Never."

"You made me a card with sparkles and a poem." I reasoned.

"Kevin made me do that! I'm older than you."

"I'm smarter than you."

"No the f-"

"In math." I smiled bigger as he had an stumped expression and looked like he was going to punch me. Craig stepped closer to me, staring at me very seriously in the eyes. I was a bit scared, though I took this opportunity to drown in his grey mist of orbs. He leaned forward near my ear, and whispered a measurement. I chuckled lightly, then grabbing his chin, I said in his ear _my_ measurement. After I said so, the raven had an surprised look.

"R-really? We're the SAME length?" I nodded mirthfully. "Damn it. Okay, I'm more stronger than you."

"You're only stronger in _some_ ways. In a match, you might win physically. Mentally, I'm not sure who would win, we're both fragile in that area." I mused. Who would win if him and I ever fought?

"So you admit that I'm the seme?" Craig prodded stubbornly.

"No, you're just too cute to be on top!" I gushed. He cocked his head in thought.

"So you're saying you're more manly than me?"

"Uhm, no. I'm not all that tough, but I know I'm not girly." The raven stood up, went to Stripe's cage, and got her out. He then handed her to me, as soon as her fur touched my hand I squealed.

"AWWW SHE IS SOOO FREAKING CUTE! AWW YESH YOU ARE! Look at your wittle little paws!" I chattered, rubbing her head against my cheek. "AWWW! You're just the softest little mousie there is uh?"

My happiness was spoiled when I saw Craig staring at me with both brows raised.

"..."

"What? Stripe is so cute!"

"..." Now he had an blank look, I couldn't even read his eyes.

"Craig?"

"...That was...what you just did...erm.." He muttered. "Kenny, you do know that was the most GIRLIEST scene I had ever seen?"

"Sorry, I have a weakness for darling stuff like this, and you." I pouted, he smirked proudly.

"Then it's settled, I'm the seme. Now give me back my Stripe before I hurt you."

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

As we arrived at Stark's Pond, the sausage biscuit freak laid flat on the grass, his arms folded behind his head.

"Are you sane?" I questioned amused. "You're simply going to lay on this grass people stepped, spit, and peed on? Maybe even dumped on, it's South Park after all."

"Mhm, I've gotten myself into messier situations before. Relax Craig, come down here with me." He urged. I sighed and sat cross legged next to him. I thought better of it, I got up and repositioned Kenny so his head rested in my lap. I let my hands brush his brown hair affectionately (I hoped it seemed affectionate). Am I showing my love for him right? Am I over doing it? Am I not doing enough? I started to pat his head vigorously. Perhaps too rough, since Kenny reached up and held my hand to keep it still.

"You're trying too hard Hun, you letting me on your lap is fulfilling as it is." He hummed, closing his eyes in peace. The assurance made me relieved, though he had called me 'Hun' (girly as hell) therefore I pinched his nose sharply. Ken let out an sweet 'ow' noise, I smiled gently. I closed my eyes with him, letting the breeze pass against us. I leaned back on my hands. After about 20 minutes of stillness(I almost dozed off), my boyfriend spoke.

"For us being on a date to know each other better, we're horrible." Ah, I forgot. We were suppose to get closer and communicate, not sit in the grass and fall asleep.

"We could try talking about ourselves?" I offered.

"Mk. Well this is where I had my first death, where my friends and Kevin first saw it." Kenny told me distantly, as if he was back in the memory.

"I-I'm so sorry. What happened, and why wasn't LM there?"

"We were camping, I was 6 and Kare was 4, so she was too young to come. Which she whined about. I could recall being so carefree.." I gazed down to see a soft smile on him. "We were having fun, playing cops and robbers, having wars, pretending to hunt each other down. Then it started raining abruptly, thunder spreading across the sky. Kevin yelled for us to get inside our tent, we ran towards it, already drenched. Craig, do you see that tree over there, that's broken in half?"

I turned to where he pointed and saw saw it, the tree was detached from it's trunk.

"That's how I died. The lightening struck it, the tree fell on top of me." I winced, imagining the pain. "No, it's fine. An 100 tree smacking me is a quick fatality." He said comfortingly.

"I'm sorry." I apologize again, not knowing why. "But if that was your first death, how did they know you'd be back and keep your body safe?"

"That's just it, they didn't." Kenny chuckled. "I was in hell then, since I stole animal crackers from mini markets. I looked up at my friends and Kevin and saw them sobbing, mourning my death. I cried along with them, I cried for the next 2 weeks. The devil tortured me heartlessly, and his demons. I was repeatedly burned, cursed at, drowned in blood, and stabbed. Then one day, I blinked open my eyes and saw I was back on Earth. I walked home with dry blood coating me. Kevin noticed me and instantly embraced me. Asking if I'm some kind of ghost or evil spirit. When I said it was me, he told me about how he and my friends didn't tell anyone about my death. We promised that no one else would know what happened that day."

"Oh. Any..anything else?" I prodded hesitantly, not wanting to push. I want to know about him.

"I wasn't troubled, surprisingly. To me, it was all a bad dream, it didn't happen. Then I kept dieing a good 5 times a week. Shot at, ran over, fell out the window, you name it. I continued to come back to life. I didn't know what I was, I still don't. You pretty much know the rest, me being separated from everyone else, hiding myself, messed up in the head, blah." Kenny finished.

"You know you're not ugly, right? And that you're not useless in life?" I questioned concerned.

"Sorta yes, I still get self conscious sometimes. The only issue I have now is finding out what I am." He said softly.

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I didn't want to get into my many troubles of discovering what I am and why I'm living, even though this date is for us to know more of each other. But that doesn't mean it has to be all depressed right? Before he could speak again, I said,

"We should talk about something else. Like, how is South Park to you?" Craig shook his head in good humor.

"Did you really just ask that? This place can somehow be full of shit and awesomeness at the same time."

"Hehe, I know what you mean." I chuckled. "Remember when those aliens came and Kyle cursed them out?"

"Haha yeah. Or that time when all those girls dated Clyde just to use him for later?" The raven snickered. "Then he spread the rumor of all of them having herpes of the mouth." I peered up at him shocked. I had flat out believed the gossip and avoided those girls for that whole year.

"Wow. Oh how about the 'Rise of the Homeless?'"

"I was scared shitless man! All those bums and hobos coming everywhere, it was gross and terrif-" Craig had stopped short, seeing my plain face. "S-Sorry..I didn't mean it like that! You're one of the good bums."

"It's ok. Hey how much do you play outside?" I've been wondering this for awhile. The only times I do see him out is when he's playing basketball in the summer, not all year around like my gang and I do. Other times, he'd be in the coffee shop with Tweek, or at the movies or whatever.

"_Play?_ Seriously? You've obviously don't know my how old I am. See, _play_ turns into _video gaming_ at my age. I haven't played in like 2 years. I told you, I'm very mature." Once more, I peer up shocked.

"You mean you haven't had fun in 24 months?" I shouted. "You poor, poor child!" I sprang up and lifted my love up to his feet, that caused a grunt of disapproval. I hauled him over closer to the pond.

"Let's play in the water!" I chirped childishly, clasping my hands. Craig gave me his famous blank face.

"No." He deadpanned, turning around. Fueled by my determination to release the antic side out of him and to show him how to have fun, I 'reasonably' jumped onto his back and wrestled him to the ground(His back is perfectly healed now, so it's ok).

"KENNY WHAT THE FUCK!" The silver eyed teen thrashed uselessly in my hold. My legs were in between his so he couldn't get up, my hands securing his arms.

"Well whaddaya know, I would win if we fight. Better be careful Craig." I winked teasingly as he flailed harder. "Aw, you know you like the position we're in, admit it." His face turned scarlet and he growled. Pure adorableness.

"I'm going to count up to 5." My darling started slowly. "If you're not off me by then, I'll be forced to punch you. 1...2..." I smiled sweetly and dragged him over near the pond, wading in the low end. Feeling the water touch his body, Craig abruptly spun and jumped up. I quickly grab his arms and hold them behind his back.

"Why is it so hard for you to have fun?" I asked miserably. I've never seen such a child, who rejects playing in the water? NOBODY. EVER.

"I do have fun you moron, let me go! Just because I don't wanna splash in the-" Before I could let him finish his speech, I reached down and slapped the water up onto his face. I tell you after I did so, Craig's face took on an appearance that would even make Damien run for the hills.

"Oh, _now_ it's ON!" I screamed excitedly as I was shoved down by him, I instinctively wrapped my legs around his torso and rolled. The little water splattered around us as we tackled each other, our clothes only a bit wet since we weren't in the deep end. Another roll, he was on top of me. Magnetic stormy orbs gazed at my hazel ones.

"Tch, you are so fucking stupid." Craig laughed which petrified me, seeing and hearing him laugh and smile so freely.

Deciding to take advantage of this opportunity I cherished the angelic moment. That's it, Craig is my angel. My demonic, stubborn, short tempered, bad ass, cautious, funny, cute, angel. I'm so grateful now, seeing I really do make him happy. The raven's smile is such a captivating picture, and his laugh is an sublime melody to my ears. Why can't he be like this more often? Why only he's like this when it's just us (not that I'm complaining)? I wish I could make him like this more often, he's just so beautiful. Who knew silver eyes could twinkle as if it was a star. Or a corpse could laugh as if it was a kid on the swings. Those alluring plump lips smiling down at me, I wish to feel them against my own. I want to kiss my angel with all my love, though my angel is not ready for that, so I'll wait. Unfortunately, Craig eventually realizes my dreamy staring and quiets down. He then starts blushing and scorning when I _keep_ staring. I smiled gently, I snaking my arms around his neck and bringing his head closer. I feathered kisses all over his face, occasionally feeling the closed scars on his cheeks.

"I love you so much." I sighed against my angel's chin, the raven inhaled.

"I love you too.." I kissed his eyebrow, cheeks, forehead, nose, any place that wasn't his mouth. Not even going close to the corner of his lips. I adore kissing him in such a manner, to touch him affectionately. I hummed pleasantly against Craig's skin. After several more smooches, he pushed back, flushed and panting. He pants when I overwhelm him with emotions. I mentally kicked myself, how dare I forget not to flood him with my passion and embrace him too much? My partner is so damn careful about not becoming obsessive over me, I have a limit of how much I could touch him. Yet I respect it.

"S-Sorry," Craig apologized still flushed, seeing my slightly disappointed face. "I did like it.." I reached up and caressed his cheek.

"Nah, it's fine." I forced a smile. Remembering the constant wetness on my back and hair, I recalled we were in the pond. "We should get up."

Stepping on land, we surveyed out clothes, luckily we were only a bit drenched. Should be dry within 20 minutes. Then, a memory flew back into my mind and I screeched. I snatched up Craig's hand and jolted towards the woods speedily. I heard his complaints about being dragged around by people, though I ignored it for now. After running far enough into the forest, I stopped.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

"I...I want..an explanation!" I demanded, puffing. I swear I'm going to catch a heart attack with this fool. Especially from all those kisses he planted.

"Er, my friends and I have an tradition of spying on each other with our first dates." Kenny clarified. "But I want ours to be private...hehe."

"Don't you 'hehe' me!" I exclaimed hysterically, laughing lightly. "That is retarded as hell!"

"Agreed," He laughed. "Nevertheless it's fun, you gotta try it. Speaking of first date, Kyle is going out with Tweek today! That means...Stan must be trailing me."

"Why Stan and not Cartman?"

"Cartman won't admit it, though he favors Kyle more than me. He'll definitely be with him today. I wonder how Ky and the coffee kitten are doing so far..." Kenny pondered excitedly. I squinted my eyes.

"Why is that Jew with Tweek anyway? Is he trying to harm him? I swear if he puts one scrawny ass hand on him I'll cut off his balls without numbing. I'll stab each of his eyeballs 6 times and twist his neck until it snaps off! Then I will go on to burn his body and rain the ashes over a christian church." I growled. My partner gave me an disturbed look.

"Whoa, where did that come from! Are you ok?" I blushed fuddled, we started walking.

"You see, my gang and I had grown _protective _of Tweek over the years-"

"Pfft, that's an under statement. How about OVER protective?" I glared at him warningly, he shut his trap.

"As I was saying. Tweek is so jittery, naive, fearful, sweet, fragile, hot and innocent. Wait, he's not that innocent. We couldn't help but guard him and keep him safe. Like this one time, a boy tried to trick Tweek into giving him money, which almost worked."

"What happened?" Kenny asked curiously.

"Token, Clyde, and I ganged up and beat the crap out of him, that's what happened." I smiled. "Thus, it's wise Kyle not hurt Tweek, or we'll put him such misery."

"Do you have any mercy?" He exasperated.

"Every now and then." I grinned.

"I'm certain Kyle would never hurt a delicate flower like your coffee kitten Craig. Wait, you called Tweek hot."

"Yeah, don't you think the way he stutters and spazzes is fine?" Kenny shook his brunette head.

"I don't understand Kyle and you. Anyways, do you have more questions for me?"

"I really don't have anymore." I shrugged, not thinking of anything at the moment.

"I have one, how was it like not showing your emotions? I've been wondering that for a long time now. Not smiling much or laughing, going on in life balling up your true feelings." My roommate confessed. I lifted my orbs up to the sky.

"It was...I don't know, I've never put much thought into it. My body and heart was cracked from killing China, so it felt natural not smiling or anything anymore, since it wouldn't last. I felt nothing. Although now, I want to show you all of my love that I could muster." His hazel eyes beamed cheerfully at the commitment. Kenny squeezed my hand firmly.

"Take your time, I'll wait for you, remember?" He noted. "I love you." I glanced at him guiltily then turned away.

"I love you too." Another thing, I can't say I love him to his face. The only reason I did back at the pond was since he was kissing my chin, so I couldn't see his eyes. I wish I could show I care more, though it's hard. He'll surely leave me if I don't satisfy him. However, if I become clingy, he'll leave. What _is_ the right amount of attention you should provide your lover for a steady relationship? First, I gave China too much. Now, I'm not giving enough, and I _know_ it causes Kenny to hurt. The way he looked when I pulled away from his kisses, it stabbed me. The sausage biscuit freak tries to act like everything's okay, although I know it's not. I see what Kevin meant, Kenny does deserve more. He deserves to feel the love he thought would never come, and I'm lucky enough to bestow that. I admire him so much. Turning, I was about to say 'I love you', he glanced at me hopefully. Of course, a voice warned me what happened the last time I loved someone and I wimped out. The brunette smiled sadly and nodded understandingly.

"It's okay." He assured. I hate it when the McCormick does that, I feel even worse. Comforting me, saying '_its okay_', _'it's alright_, or '_I'll wait_.' He shouldn't _have_ to wait. I love him. I love him. I love him. I said it in my head for the past 2 days at night, though never saying it out loud to him first. I would begin thinking that I'm not enough for him, though that's quitter's talk. I'm not going to lose him, not like China. Kenny showed me that even if laughs and smiles won't last, I could take what life gives me. He shows me love isn't hopeless. He blesses me by bringing my shitty life happiness. And I can't even permit him to kiss my lips. After walking for about 30 minutes, Kenny halted.

"We should stop here, we don't want to get too deep into the woods and become lost." The brunette advised, I nodded. We went over to a sturdy tree and sat against it, still holding hands. I just remembered that Kenny is Guy, the dude I had met over the internet. I was going to accuse and interrogate him, but I decided to keep it to myself till later use. Also, our clothes are about dry now. I finally thought of another question, though probably a sensitive one.

"Kenny...do you..do you _want_ to die?" I asked carefully. I tensed when I saw his body flinch. He was quiet for a minute, then answered.

"I-I'll tell you the truth. Yes, I want to die, it's one of the things I crave for the most."

"Oh Ken.."

"No, don't be sorry, or try to convince me otherwise. But in the beginning it was worse. Around the earlier times I was first dieing, my thirst to stay in the After Life was strong. I attempted suicide, though Kevin would always stop me before doing so, or my friends. Around that time, I was kept over good watch."

* * *

><p><strong>*Kenny's POV*<strong>

I sighed, naturally Craig would ask this sooner or later. Everyone who's aware of my secret does, except my parents. They haven't inquired about my want yet. I struggled to explain more.

"I just desire to be 'normal' and be a pure human. Though nothings 'normal'. It's not like I want to die exactly _right_ now. You don't know how it feels to not pass away completely, to be separated from everyone else. To wonder why you're even here, or maybe why God doesn't want you or the Devil. Neither keeps me in there sanctum for long. I must be some kind of monstrosity cursed for being created. Or when I was little, I thought I had super powers."

I could remember being Mysterion, playing with all of them and actually saving people. I named myself Mysterion because, duh, no one knew my identity which I loved back then. Though mostly because I felt as if I was a big question mark, walking around everyday.

"Dude, you shouldn't even want to die, not ever. Not even in your condition." Craig asserted. "You're right, I don't know how it feels, seeing Heaven and Hell numerous of times. However you have people who care for you. Do you recall what I said when you first told me about your deaths? I said being a human isn't all that great, and it isn't. You've probably haven't noticed, but humans are complete assholes, causing wars, pollution, ruining the Earth. You're unique Kenny, I mean that. Yes, you might be some kind of cursed creature, but I appreciate you for that. Who knows, if you're not human, you could be an angel."

Except your my angel, so how can I be too? Though I have thought of that. However there's one thing,

"If I could be an angel, there's an equal chance I could be a demon." I pointed out. I glanced over to him and saw another new face I haven't behold yet. A look of concern. Craig's eyes emitted worry, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Don't be so distressed about it, I'm okay. I'm not trying to kill myself anymore, so everything's okay, really." I clutched his hand firmly.

"But...I.." The raven began, I gazed at him again. He turned away. Once more, my darling was going to say he loves me, then stopped.

"I know, I'm simply too interested in death. I even pondered about how I want my life to end. I want my end to be like Deidara's in Naruto. A beautiful explosion and bang, perfect art. I shall only last forever in your memory and heart, not lasting on Earth forever to be watched like Sasori's belief in art." I mused mirthfully. Deidara is such a genius, when seeing art, you have to let the beauty go. That's how I want to die, with a bang. He smirked at me.

"Are you serious? You actually want to explode?"

"W-well not exactly, though I have exploded before. I want to go out like a candle light. Soft, silent, and sudden. Painless and painful. So technically, it's still some sort of 'bang'." I stammered, realizing how ridiculous it sounded. I have to try explaining myself better. Craig blinked at me.

"Gosh, I love your morbidness." He smiled. "You think about things regular people don't do so often." I blushed faintly.

"Thank y-you. How do you want your end to be?" My love cocked his head in thought for moment.

"I want to end with the world, for the world to end with me I guess. When I die, the world should die as well, so the people I care for will be with me too. Also everyone should die anyway, what's it been, over 2000 years? Yea, we had a good run on Earth."

"Pfft! Don't you think that's, I don't know, SELFISH?" I laughed, he shrugged shamelessly.

"What is love to you?" Craig questioned unexpectedly, I had to look twice. "What, I can't ask something!"

"N-no, I was just taken aback. I think love is giving the person you care for your heart and full affection basically. Going out of their way to be and protect you. That's what I got from Kevin anyways. That's why I think cards are a better way to show love then sex. Intercourse has too much lust in it. Though, if you really love the person, sex is AWESOME." I grinned, remembering the last times I had it. Love practically suffocates you when you're nailing the one you dear.

"...How is sex..?" Craig asked looking away, I could spot a blush on his cheeks. I uncontrollably giggled.

"You mean you've-pfft!- never had sex?(!) I thought you've done it with China!" It appears I've made him feel worse, for he turned back scorning.

"Not everyone does it! And with China...we only went as far as putting our hands under each other's clothes." This is kinda funny, Craig is asking _me_ what sex is like.

"I could show you, better than tell you." I flirted, he snorted.

"Tch, I don't think you're that amazing in bed."

"Hehe, you'd be surprised. Haven't my brother told you how I am?" I inquired, knowing how Kev gets. The way my angel's blush darken, I knew he has been informed. "Teehee! Okay, I can't really explain it. I just know that it's exhilarating. So, what is love to you?"

"Hm, at first, I thought it was keeping the one you loved on surveillance every 5 minutes. Stalking them on facebook and in real life, making sure know one gets too close to them. I thought love was a one chance thing only. So you obviously had to make sure you keep that person, even by force. However now, I know that's the incorrect way to love someone." Craig mused, his silver eyes seemingly going back into the past. I knew this was a touchy subject, so I asked gently,

"What do you think of love now, that you're with me?" He gazed at me, orbs glowing affection. I promise you I actually felt the force of the affection pushing me back.

"I think love is when you feel free with that person. When you look up to that person, when you want to hold that person close always. When you're happiest with them. When you feel like you're falling, the air is rushing against you. Though you never hit the ground."

"AWW-" I began, overcome from the adorableness.

"But if you tell a soul about this, I'll fucking rip your head off and chew it in front of your family!" He threaten. I nodded giggling, wrapping both my arms around his arm and resting my body on him, I closed my eyes. The raven can be so cute sometimes, he really is expressing himself more.

* * *

><p><strong>*Craig's POV*<strong>

After a long pause, I've discovered that Kenny had fallen asleep. Glancing down, I could see his hazel orbs shut, lips slightly parted. I gingerly repositioned myself so I wouldn't jar him awake. I sat in front of him, holding his shoulders to prevent him from falling over. Why can't I say I love him, before he tells me so? It's very easy and simple. Only takes about 2 seconds at the most. We appear to be great partners so far, though I'm not giving anything for Kenny. He awards me with such passion and fondness, I want to offer something. I want to feel the touch of his lips against mines as much as anyone else. I want to love him, fully. I found myself leaning near his dreaming face.

"I..I love...I love you." I whispered shakily. I pressed my lips to his delicately. I held it there as my heart warned to shoot out of my chest. He felt great, the affection seemed overwhelming. I pulled back and studied his face, still sleeping. Realization struck me, I kissed him on the lips. I told him I love him.. And I've done of all of this _first._ This time I kissed him more firmly, breathing I love you again. My heart is practically exploding from the caressing I'm causing. Horrifyingly, arms snaked around my neck, tugging me closer.

"I love you too, Craig." Kenny's gentle voice muttered against my lips. My eyes popped open to see shocking hazel. I jerked back.

"I-I'm sorry!" I stuttered uselessly. My partner tugged me back onto him.

"This is what we both need.." His kissed my neck tenderly, I gasped. "We both desired to be and have love for someone, so we have each other. Please Craig, let me sink my affection inside you, and you returning it."

* * *

><p><strong>*My POV*<strong>

The raven moaned as he felt his boyfriend's tongue brush against his bottom lip. _Every sense in my body is telling me to run, not to let this bastard plant his love into, I don't want to harm him. But I have to let him,_ the Tucker thought frantically. Kenny played with his angel's tongue with his own, vibrating a moan in his mouth. The brunette then started to thrust his hips against the other teen's. Revolving in Craig gasping again.

"Is that okay? Not too much?" Kenny cautioned, pulling back. _I don't want to _force_ him into doing this..._ he worried. _I want him to want_ _and accept this as much as I do. _Fortunately, the silver eyed boy nodded and pressed their mouths back together. The complicated teen felt the McCormick's hand slid other his shirt, he shuddered. Craig had an urge to repay the pleasure he was bursting with, so he began to rub his hands up and down Kenny's thighs. The sausage biscuit freak groaned in response.

"You're my angel." He suddenly hummed. "You're beautiful just like one, troubled like a innocent child, and giving me hope."

"You're my savior." Craig replied, kissing his lips softly. "You bring my heart life, you're admirable like a hero, and you give me strength."

_I give him hope?_, The raven mused. _I give him strength?,_ The brunette pondered, _How cute!_

Kenny embraced his darling tightly, kissing him hard. _Is this what it feels like to be loved and give it? _He wondered. _Is this is what I believed_ _that would never come to me?_ The McCormick started rubbing his fingers against Craig's sides under the shirt. The guinea pig appreciator groaned and squeezed his roommate's thighs, causing him to moan.

"Kenny..." Craig whispered between kisses. "I'm enjoying this...a lot I must say." The hazel orbs shined before him.

"You're not alone sweet heart." _Maybe I'm liking this too much. I'm beginning to want more of him. My heart swells each time our tongues brush, each time he moans in contentment, each time he squeezes me. What if I lose this, him? No, I don't want that. I need to detach from Kenny before_ _I lose control, _The raven thought wildly, _My head is getting dizzy from all this anyways._

Craig pulled back panting, resting his head on his savior's chest. The McCormick removed his hands from under his shirt.

"...Are you obsessed with me?" Kenny asked curiously, though more amused. He couldn't understand how the raven handled all the passion he injected into him for that long. He was sure his angel was going to start panting when he touched his bare skin.

"...I don't know. I don't want to lose you. I don't want you to hate me. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want you to reject me. I think I am obsessed with you.." Craig sighed, moving to kiss the boy's neck softly.

"You know what? _I_ don't want to lose you, _I_ don't want you to hate me, _I _don't want to hurt, and _I _don't want you to reject me. So lets be obsessed together." The hazel eyed teen smiled gently. The Tucker gazed at him and kissed his lips passionately, bravely.

"That sounds like a great plan. I love you Kenny." Craig murmured.

"I love you too." Kenny kissed back.

* * *

><p><em>I change my mind, <em>this_ is how I want to end my life. With him, giving him the assurance he needs on Earth. Helping him love thi_s _insane world, fully. With him, I'm complete. If I ever die with my angel,_ _I know I'll always forever be with him._ _I was and am selfish before I met him, _I_ wanted to be loved, but I've never thought of giving it. __I've never thought about other people wishing the same as I do. Once again, I never think of anyone else. However, when he's in my arms, enjoying my embrace, I'm in peace. With him, I am dead, not in Heaven, nor hell, nor Earth. I'm in peace, just that. And when I'm not with him, I'm alive._

* * *

><p><em>Perhaps my end of dieing with the world IS an horrible idea. Ending my life with my partner seems like a much better offer. Now that I could love this life, and love him, I don't want to kill the world along with me. When my end comes, he will eventually die again and I'll see him hopefully. Then when it's time for him to go back down to Earth for some reason, <em>I'll_ wait for him that time. He wouldn't have to wait for me any longer. I love him, I love him, I love. We will be obsessed together. I have to let go of Her. I had let my heart pass away with Her, I shouldn't have allowed that to happen. Although he had corrected my mistake. By encouraging me to accept my feelings and expose them. Yes, loving life, loving him, is my end. Our end._

* * *

><p><strong>AWWW! SO SWEET! THEY WANT TO END THEIR LIFE WITH EACH OTHER! -sniffle- My story is now over!. I wonder if Stan was still spying on Kenny when they were making out...he probably puked. I REALLY hope you enjoyed reading this :D! First,<strong>

**_Thank you for all that reviewed while I was making this, all of your comments made my day and made me smile! And I mean everyone!  
><em>**

**_If you haven't yet reviewed, DO IT NOW! If you can, please tell me why you liked or disliked this fanfic, again I must know your opinions!_**

**_ Also, can't wait for the 14th, New episodes!  
><em>**


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